Mom and Pop Art                                             Written by Al Jean
                                                 Directed by Steven Dean Moore
==============================================================================
Production code: AABF15                   Original Airdate on FOX: 11-Apr-1999
Capsule revision A (10-Jul-01)
==============================================================================
> "TV Guide" Synopsis  {hl}
==============================================================================
   [Canadian TV Guide] Homer's ability to channel his anger into art impresses
   art dealer Astrid Weller (Isabella Rossellini).

==============================================================================
> Title sequence
==============================================================================
Blackboard:     A TRAINED APE COULD / NOT TEACH GYM

                A TRAINED APE COULD / NOT TEACH GY   at cutoff

Couch:          The family wears cowboy hats and rides on the couch,
                sidesaddle.  Beneath them, a trapdoor in the floor opens and
                the couch falls through.  The camera looks through the door,
                and we see the family falling towards a city far below, like
                Slim Pickens riding the bomb in "Dr. Strangelove."  [Recycled
                from AABF07]

==============================================================================
> Did You Notice...
==============================================================================
   ... Barney's former girlfriend, the Japanese conceptual artist, frequents
       the art shows?
   ... Homer chucks a loaded gun into Maggie's playpen -- while she's in it?
   ... the mystery vegetables on Marge's curtains seem to have morphed back
       into carrots?

Ben Collins:
   ... Milhouse has an Isotopes pennant in his room?

Don Del Grande:
   ... Homer was supposed to start painting the garage on July 18, 1995?
   ... Maggie falls when Marge and the kids appear from behind the house?
   ... apparently, the question "where does all of the money the family make
       [go]?" has been answered, $68,000 at a time
   ... Jasper Johns only had 11 words, including "yoink"?
   ... Homer draws by holding his pencil in his fist?
   ... the four-armed/legged man was wearing a jockstrap?
   ... Homer is not a fan of the magician Valentino (the one from "Magic's
       Biggest Secrets Finally Revealed")?
   ... Milhouse has a "Krusty the Klown Show" garbage can?
   ... in the last scene, Maggie is on the roof with a lifejacket?

Yuri Dieujuste:
   ... the warning about snapping your fingers?
   ... Luanne and Pryo at the Louvre: American Style
   ... Sarah and Chief Wiggum water-skiing?
   ... the Debutante from 4F05 has returned?

Jordan Eisenberg:
   ... Doug Vaccaro's apron has a man who's just hit his thumb with a hammer?
   ... Lenny calls Carl "big guy?"
   ... a lion and a lamb sleeping together?
   ... this was the first "Yoink!" done by a celebrity guest?

E. E. Fooner:
   ... some of the boxes in the hardware store are stacked to resemble the USA
       flag?

Curtis Gibby:
   ... at Homer's showing, Barney had a jacket, but his belly was showing
       through his T-shirt like always?  (What a slob! <g>)

Joe Green:
   ... Astrid Weller drives a BMW?  [See "Comments" section for more -- Ed.]
   ... a man is dressed like a caveman at the gallery?

Dave Hall:
   ... Homer emptied at least two beers into his coconut?
   ... Homer hasn't finish painting the garage in almost 3.5 years?
   ... the BBQ Pit kit is both new and on sale?
   ... Lisa wore the overalls over her strapless dress?
   ... a wristwatch strapped to a 2-by-4?
   ... Homer dons different entire after buying the BBQ pit kit?
   ... Homer carries a flashlight around with him?
   ... not hearing gun shots worries Marge?
   ... Ms. Weller wears a black wristband on her left wrist?
   ... Maggie is missing from dinner?
   ... Homer makes fun of a man in an apron yet he dons one later?
   ... the two bar denizens, Larry and Sam, are missing from the bar?
   ... someone is selling Homer Simpson merchandise at the art show?
   ... Milhouse's Mom and her boyfriend at the art show?
   ... Maggie could ride a tricycle?  :-)
   ... Homer used barbwire in his attempt to build a birdhouse?
   ... Homer and Marge holding hands at the Springsonian Museum?
   ... no cars on the street when Homer and Bart steal the door mats?
   ... the Simpsons have (had) a vanity door mat?
   ... every home has a fire hydrant in front of it?
   ... the SNPP cooling towers on the Springfield skyline?
   ... Jebediah Springfield's statue has a snorkel and the bear too?
   ... Maude isn't in the portraits that hang above Ned and her bed?
   ... the Krusty Walky-talky on Milhouse's desk?
   ... the set of skis in Milhouse's bedroom?
   ... Prof. Frink taking a stroll in his plastic bubble?
   ... Burns and Smithers taking a leisurely ride in a swan?
   ... Bart and Lisa having a picnic on the roof?
   ... Eddie and Lou drive a speedboat while the Wiggums water-ski.
   ... Chief Wiggum wears nothing but shorts and his police hat.

Darrel Jones:
   ... Cletus's voice sounds a little off?

Haynes Lee:
   ... "Astrid Weller" is an anagram for "Sell weird art"?

Tyler McHenry:
   ... that Bart is eating an entire cheese wheel?
   ... the Texan who makes foolish purchases at the second art fair?
   ... Matt Groening's signature is on the frame, not the picture?
   ... Homer recognizes Andy Warhol?

Tom Rinschler:
   ... Santa's Little Helper under the dining room table as the family eats?

Benjamin Robinson:
   ... for that matter, Marge forgot to take Maggie out back with the other
       kids?
   ... only Smithers pedals the swan boat?

Evan Ross:
   ... Bart licking the Popsicle?
   ... Bart takes off his shirt when he is outside on the roof at the end?

Mike Smith:
   ... it's Jean's first Simpsons script (Solo and/or with other people) in
       almost three years (Since "Lisa's Sax" was one of the four 3G episodes
       made after Season 7)?
   ... the episode title referred to the hardware store that brought much of
       the items that his artworks was made from?

Gary Wilson:
   ... normal stores in Springfield don't sell pants for a man of Homer's
       "carriage" (239 lbs.)?
   ... it's been four years since Homer started painting the garage and no one
       even through away the paint cans?
   ... Mom and Pop Hardware is a subsidiary of Global Dynamics, Inc?
   ... the Pimply Faced Teen is pricing steel wool?
   ... Skinner is no longer charmed by Edna's "ha!" laugh?
   ... Skinner and Krabappel weren't very concerned that Bart heard their
       conversation, even though their relationship is still a secret?
   ... it's the Christmas season when this episode takes place (or Springfield
       has a Toys for Tots box year round)?
   ... Chief Wiggum knows "Père Noël" is French for "Santa Clause", no matter
       how poorly he pronounces it?
   ... Marge doesn't seem concerned that Homer has a gun in the house anymore?
   ... Homer has apparently had his car since the days when he was "Single 'n'
       Sassy" or wants people to think he still is single?
   ... Barney apparently has been going to AA Meetings (12 Steps)?
   ... Homer is angry at the implication that Bart is attracted to Milhouse,
       yet seems quite intrigued at watching his friends shower?
   ... Homer thinks he's screwed up Bart?

Alexander S. Woods:
   ... the Piet Mondrian work on the cover of Art in America?

==============================================================================
> Voice Credits
==============================================================================
- Starring
   - Dan Castellaneta (Homer, Barney, Tex)
   - Julie Kavner (Marge)
   - Nancy Cartwright (Bart)
   - Yeardley Smith (Lisa)
   - Hank Azaria (Teen, Doug, Wiggum, Cletus, Moe, Gunter, Carl, Worker, Andy
        Warhol)
   - Harry Shearer (Ned, Skinner, Announcer  {je}, Burns, Smithers, Lenny)

- Special Guest Voice
   - Jasper Johns (Himself)
   - Isabella Rossellini (Astrid)
   - Marcia Wallace (Edna)

- Also Starring
   - Pamela Hayden (Milhouse)
   - Tress MacNeille (Extra woman)
   - Maggie Roswell (Maude  {je})
   - Karl Wiedergott (Cecil [?])

==============================================================================
> Movie (and other) references
==============================================================================
   + pop art (art genre)  {tr}
      - title is a take-off  [See "Comments" section for more -- Ed.]

   + "Dr. Strangelove" (movie)
      - family rides an atom bomb to its target, like the Slim Pickens
        character in the movie
      - [I decided to re-cite the reference, after all -- Ed.]

   + "Lime in the Coconut" (song)  {jg}
      - Homer sings Harry Nilsson song, but about beer

   - Hawaiian Punch (canned drink)  {dh}
      - Homer dons Hawaiian hat and shirt, lying in the hammock, sipping on a
        coconut drink [like the commercials for Hawaiian Punch]

   + Home Depot (chain of hardware stores)  {yd}
      - "Mom and Pop Hardware" store similar  [See "Comments" section for more
        -- Ed.]

   + "Home Improvement" (TV series)
      - "Toolin' Around'" strongly resembles show-within-a-show "Tool Time"

   ~ Orchard Supply Hardware (chain of hardware stores)  {ddg}
      - the in-store ad is similar to Richard Karn's ads

   - "Godfather" (movie)  {asw}
      - Homer pulls gun from behind water tank of toilet

   + Pere Noël (mythical figure)  {bjr}
      - Wiggum calls Homer "pear Noël", referencing Homer's body shape and the
        French Santa Claus  [See "Comments" section for more -- Ed.]

   - "Psycho" (movie)  {gw}
      - when Homer is driving in his car, trying to get rid of the BBQ, the
        shots and music are similar to the famous scene where Janet Leigh is
        driving in the rain

   + "Love, American Style" (TV series)
      - Springfield's avant-garde gallery called "Louvre: American Style"

   + "White Christmas" (song)  {tr}
      - Burns nearly bought "Guernica" for a song -- this one

   + "David" (statue)  {bjr}
      - Michelangelo's statue of David recreated with junk at the first art
        show

   + "A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte" (painting)  {ddg}
      - Barney's napkin drawing is a copy of Seruat's famous painting of a
        French riverbank scene

   + Homer's "Odyssey" (epic poem)
      - Greek epic poem (and poet) lend name to Homer's solo art show

   + The Smithsonian (museum)  {bjr}
      - The Springsonian Museum inspired by the Washington, D.C., showcase

   + "Life In Hell" (comic strip)
      - Homer disses an Akbar and Jeff painting from this strip  [N.B.:
        "Simpsons" creator Matt Groening also draws "Life in Hell" -- Ed.]

   - "Duck Amuck" (cartoon)

   - "Rabbit Rampage" (cartoon)  {eac}
      - two classic Warner Brothers cartoons that featured the characters
        arguing with their animators and being partially erased

   + "The Sleeping Gypsy" (painting)  {bjr}
      - the first image in Homer's nightmare comes from this Henri Rousseau
        painting

   + "Terminator 2" (movie)  {jg}
      - the gunman in the Cubist painting says "Hasta la vista, baby!"

   - "Mortal Kombat" (video game)  {cg}
      - in Homer's dream, Leonardo's 4-armed, 4-legged man punching and
        kicking him is like Goro (and other multi-armed creatures) in this
        series of games

   + Andy Warhol (artist)
      - his famous picture of Campbell soup appears in museum and Homer's
        dream
      - artist himself fights Homer in the dream sequence [See "Comments"
        section for more -- Ed.]

   + "Magic's Greatest Secrets Revealed" (TV specials)
      - Homer confuses Cristo with Valentino, the Masked Magician from these
        specials

   + Noah's Ark (Biblical tale)  {hl}
      - at first, Ned thinks the Lord has drowned the wicked and spared the
        righteous

   + "Everything's Coming Up Roses" (song)  {jg}
      - "Everything's coming up Milhouse!"

==============================================================================
> Previous episode references
==============================================================================
- Moe's Bigotry  {bc}
   - [2F15] "We saved your ass in World War II"
   - [3F20] Anti-immigrant campaign
   - [AABF14] Bad-mouths Catholics

- [7G03] Name of Homer's Solo Show: Homer's Odyssey  {dh}
- [7G03] Homer's Odyssey (episode title) gag is re-used on a sign in this ep
         {gw}
- [7F05] Antoine "Tex" O'Hara appears  {jg}
- [7F06] Wild animals in a pool of water  {je}
- [7F12] Homer tries to speak French  {bc}
- [7F13] Lenny and Carl shower at SNPP  {gw}
- [7F14] Homer tries to return a dilapidated item  {gw}
- [7F18] Marge's artistic fascination with painting Ringo Starr
- [7F18] A Simpson is featured in an art museum  {mr}
- [7F18] Marge's art career mentioned
- [7F23] Homer buys a new barbecue  {je}
- [8F04] Krusty Walky-talky  {dh}
- [8F07] Attempted birdhouse #2  {je}
- [8F12], [2F31] Belching contests  {gw}
- [8F16] Homers failed attempts at being a handy man  {gw}
- [9F04] Fat Tony disposes of a body  {er}
- [9F19] Ray Jay Johnson's career mentioned
- [9F21] The Yoko Ono lookalike appears  {mr}
- [9F21] Barney is more talented than one would expect  {gw}
- [1F05] Homer tries, without luck, to get rid of an object  {gw}
- [1F08], [4F24], [5F08] Antoine "Tex" O'Hara is seen  {gw}
- [1F08], [1F09], [5F01] Homer has a gun in the house (though it was a bigger
         deal in 5F01 and was not a shotgun)  {gw}
- [1F16], [2F16], [3F19] A shotgun is fired one-handed  {er}
- [2F03] Simpson house underwater in one of the alternate futures  {am}
- [2F20] In a frenzy, someone ends up destroying something of their own as
         well  ("Take that, nuclear power plant!" cf. "See you in hell, The
         Simpsons!")  {je}
- [2F31] Belching contest  {hl}
- [3F16] Last time Marge's eyes are seen in the dark  {dj}
- [3G01] The "Better Homes Than Yours" magazine gag was similar to the
         Barbecue gag in this ep  {gw}
- [3G03] Homer puts something harmful in the baby's crib  (liquor bottle /
         shotgun)  {je}
- [4F05] The young debutante appears  {je}
- [4F09] Bart eavesdrops on Skinner and Krabapple's relationship
- [4F14] Evergreen Terrace flooded  {ms}
- [4F22] Angry socialite appears  {es}
- [5F04] Homer warns people of his wrath  {je}
- [5F11] Bill Gates "I didn't get rich by writing a lot of checks" is similar
         to the Pimply Faced Teens line  {gw}
- [5F15] Marge's sailboat painting  {ms}
- [5F17] Springsonian Museum seen  {bjr}
- [AABF13] Beanie Babies referenced in conjunction with crime  {gw}

==============================================================================
> Freeze frame fun
==============================================================================
- Homer's garage note  {dh}

         START
          HERE
      TOMORROW
       7/17/95

- Do-it-yourself center sign  {bjr}

          MOM & POP
          HARDWARE

       A SUBSIDIARY OF
    GLOBAL DYNAMICS, INC.

- Homer's rear bumper (or rather, his car's rear bumper)  {bjr}

    SINGLE    +------+
     'N'      |3FJP24|
    SASSY     +------+

- Art museum banner and sign, first show  {dh}

    INSIDE:  OUTSIDER ART

          LOUVRE:
       AMERICAN STYLE

- Art museum banner, second show  {dh}

    SOLO SHOW:  HOMER'S ODYSSEY

- Art museum lobby sign  {bjr}

      NO SHIRT,
      NO SHOES,
    NO CHARDONNAY

- Springsonian sign

      SPRINGSONIAN
         MUSEUM
    "WHERE THE ELITE
     MEET MAGRITTE"

==============================================================================
> Animation, continuity, and other goofs
==============================================================================
+  Unless this episode was supposed to take place in August, 1995, the date
   painted on that garage just doesn't make sense with the other episodes.
   {je}

=  The partial garage painting disappears.  {bc}

=  Lisa's cement scraper vanishes after she uses it.  {dh}

-  Homer's wheelbarrow is missing in certain shots.  {dh}

*  Damned cartoon cement!  Real cement never works that quickly.  {ag}

+  The kitchen curtains have switched from corn to carrots.  {bc}

c  Said: "you stupid ..."  CC: "You son of a ..."  {ag}

+  Homer is shaving his shoulders when he has never had hair on his shoulders?
   {gw}

-  Marge's red pearl necklace shows up slightly green in the bathroom mirror.
   {dh}

-  The master bathroom toilet shouldn't have the water tank above the toilet.
   (See other episodes.)  {dh}

+  Wasn't "The Cartridge Family" all about Marge insisting that Homer didn't
   keep a gun in the house?  Tonight she saw him wielding a shotgun and didn't
   so much as blink an eye!  [See "Comments" section for more -- Ed.]  {eac}

=  Homer's bumper is still on car even thought it's supposed to be torn off.
   {hl}

=  After Marge calls Homer to the door, the shaving cream on his shoulders
   disappears.  {dj}

=  Maggie is in her crib when Homer answers the door, but later appears with
   the other kids when they poke their heads around the corner of the house.
   (And I don't think she could have gotten there that fast by herself,
   either.)

-  When Homer meets Ms. Weller, certain shots have the path of sidewalk (in
   the front yard) leading towards the street instead of the driveway.  {dh}

+  Homers license plate was 795 DVI before, not 3FJP24.  {gw}

=  While at the art show, Bart keeps taking bites out of his cookie [a wheel
   of cheese, actually -- Ed.], but only two bite marks are shown.  {eg}

+  Mr. Burns recognizes Homer's name when Homer is mentioned?  Maybe he's
   finally learned his name.  {er}

+  We've seen Marge's ring and it is certainly not Rock Candy (so shoot me, I
   know I wrecked the joke, but that's capsule submissions for ya)  {gw}

=  Homer's arty friends are smoking cigarettes at Moe's yet no actual smoke
   leaves the cigarettes.  {dh}

=  Homer's eyes weren't visible in the dark like Marge's.  {ddg}

*  Snorkels won't help unless you can swim/float to the top.  {tmh}

-  The moon looked a little too big as Homer and Bart vandalized the town.

-  Why the hell does a street have a fire hydrant on _both sides_ every five
   feet?  Talk about paranoid!  (I'd hate to have to find a parking spot in
   that area.)  :-D  {je}

*  What was holding all of that water inside the town?  [Eric Sansoni rebuts,
   "Well, it wouldn't be the first time an American city has been flooded to
   that kind of height.  Springfield could be set lower than the surrounding
   areas."]  {tmh}

==============================================================================
> Reviews
==============================================================================
Ellen A. Cohen:  Some good bits, like all the parts with Ned Flanders, and the
   Matt Groening/giant pencil gag.  If I were Edna, I'd have smacked Skinner
   tonight. And by the ending, I was wondering if the episode wasn't one of
   Alex [Flandonwittsy]'s Homercentric episode parodies.  What was the point?
   Homer wrecks the whole town, but somehow everyone finds it okay?  It was
   beautiful and everything, but stank of insanity!  (Well, I guess every
   outsider artist has to be insane.) Here's hoping the plots will start
   making more sense ... stupid TV, be more funny!  I got more laughs in the
   first five minutes of "Family Guy" than in the whole half hour of "Mom and
   Pop Art".  (C-)

Ben Collins:  This has all the ingredients of a standard Bad Simpsons Episode:
   a heavy dose of Jerkass Homer, a ludicrous plot, lame gags that run way too
   long, little subtlety, and a "wacky" ending.  But, being a part-time
   "culture" fan, I found the art references intelligent and observant.  At
   least there are still some writers who care about things other than lame
   stand-up comics and celebrities. This may be the best possible Jerkass
   Homer episode these days.  (C-)

Lucas Cox:  Not a classic, but one of the better ones for this season.  It was
   nice to see them slide some educational stuff into the episode without
   seeming too awkward about it.  It was disappointing to see next to no Bart
   and Lisa though, they should have had some sort of sub plot involving the
   two.  Homer's art pieces were pretty funny, I think the idea of Homer's
   various failures being interpreted as art was ingenious.  My biggest gripe
   however was the ending.  Not only that it was a little too far fetched and
   contrived, but I honestly don't think Homer would be smart enough to come
   up with such a scheme.  However, the quality of the humor was above average
   for season 10, so I'll give this one a  (B)

Sarah Culp:  Fairly average, some good chuckles here and there.  The ending,
   although very wacky and almost certainly a gaping continuity mistake, did
   leave me with a good feeling.  I liked Homer's dream sequence as well.
   (B-)

Jordan Eisenberg:  Although the plot is so incredibly stupid it's almost
   laughable, I just can't give this episode a bad grade.  IMO, it had some of
   the season's funniest moments, such as Homer being erased, and also the
   wealth of FFF jokes and hidden gags.  (I'd have _never_ figured out the
   "Astrid Weller" anagram until Haynes Lee pointed it out!)  Some unfunny
   stuff was still overdone, like Jasper Johns acting like a kleptomaniac, and
   I can't stress enough how stupid the plot was.  But it was still as fun to
   watch as I could ever ask for.  Welcome back, Al Jean.  (A-)

Curtis Gibby:  This was a pretty good episode, with some well-placed humor.  I
   saw the monstrous jerk-a$$ Homer (i.e., when Marge was mad at him in bed),
   but I liked how they made up in the end.  Anyhoo, the first act wasn't
   great, so I'm going to give this one a  (B+)

Andrew Gill:  I'm divided on this one.  On one hand, the first act was
   terrible, and displays Homer at his worst.  The second act, on the other
   hand, is almost good, since they actually showed true interaction between
   Homer and someone else.  The third act, on the other hand, was terrific.  I
   would buy Homer's Venice, if I could.  (B-)

Joe Green:  Despite being yet another showcase for Homer (yawn), this episode
   had the kind of intelligent writing that recalls OFF's glory days.  I also
   appreciated the callbacks to certain older episodes.  (A-)

Darrel Jones:  A nice, but not great, episode.  Nothing spectacular enough to
   be a classic, but several great gags.  I liked Burns' "gave it up for a
   song" monologue, and Homer's dream was a classic!  Even the usual wacky
   ending didn't seem as bad.  8/10  (A-)

Haynes Lee:  This had a bad start as another Homer has a new occupation
   premise but fortunately it did not end in a total disaster.  Flanders had
   some good lines and Milhouse's "floods" pants were great.  (B)

Jake Lennington:  I'll admit I was a little bit against this episode from the
   start when I knew it was going to be yet another --"Homer on another Job"
   ep. However, I was pleasantly surprised at how much a believable jerk he
   was.  For the first time in a long time, I actually cared about Homer's
   plight with originality, and Marge's frustrations at Homer's sudden rise to
   art fame.  While it was a little disjointed at the start, the whole episode
   came together nicely in the second act and proceeded to finish on an
   artistic level with the flooded streets.  Overall, while not the most
   humorous episodes, it gave me a warm fuzzy feeling that I haven't had since
   "I'm with Cupid".  (A)

Andrew Levine:  I thought that this episodes had some very predictable jokes
   and a very unpredictable ending.  In the end the two balance each other
   out.  This is getting to be a very tired formula, though.  (C+)

Patrick McGovern:  Serendipitous!  Had the feeling of a good old fashioned ep
   like "I'm with Cupid" and last week's "Simpsons Bible Stories".  The
   writing was sharp, and there were two of the BEST celebrity voice-overs
   they've ever had (Jasper Johns was a riot, and Isabella Rossellini did a
   great job).  Also of note is the great continuity from the old "Marge takes
   up painting" ep of the past (I particularly liked Homer reminiscing over
   his "Schoolgirl dreams").  Homer's dream sequence was on par with "Homer's
   Night Out" as the most ROTFL sequence in ages, especially with Andy Warhol
   in there ("Soup's on, fat boy!").  Better yet was the ending which, while
   wacky, was well thought out and nicely done, and they managed to overcome
   possible sappiness with Jasper Johns hilarious last bit.  A classic, and
   Season 10's second best ep (Next to last week's).  (A)

Tyler McHenry:  Maybe my expectations have been lowered, but I didn't find it
   to be a bad episode.  Not very good though.  The plot was tired, and there
   weren't even any good gags to save it.  I wasn't groaning in agony, but I
   wasn't laughing either.  Boring!  (C)

Tom Rinschler:  This episode, and especially its ending, was as surreal as
   Dali's "The Persistence of Memory" featured in the story.  On the one hand,
   it had several good jokes, some interesting criticism of art (as well as
   featuring many famous works), and re-introduced Marge's dream of being an
   artist.  On the minus side, however, it had a disjointed feel, over-did
   some jokes (Smithers' reaction, for example), and failed to develop some
   interesting plot ideas.  Overall, a mixed, disappointing episode.  (C+)

Matt Rose:  Mmm ... hippo.  This one at times had a feel that was somewhat of
   a throwback to the Simpsons of old, but ultimately it became nothing more
   than a typical late-season "Homer gets into some wacky plot twist involving
   a gratuitous celebrity guest voice and all is solved in some bizarre
   non-sequitur ending". Although this show had some funny moments (for some
   reason the recurring joke with Jasper Johns cracked me up), I really
   believe they've run out of plot ideas.  Oh well ... at least Homer's
   character was palatable (in fact, I enjoy that cheery "I like stories" kind
   of characterization).  This episode is pretty much middle of the road for
   me.  (C+)

Jason Rosenbaum:  Tonight was an episode wasn't great, but it set a new
   milestone in Simpsons history: it had the absolute best third act EVER.
   Although the first and second were uneventful, the third act teemed with
   humor.  Especially the part where Homer says "Matt Groening, why is he
   here?" and then a pencil tries to erase Homer and it's actually a piece of
   art.  I swear, I was laughing so hard.  This episode would probably be a C-
   without the third act, but with the third act, I give it a solid  (B)

Evan Ross:  Very good.  I enjoyed this episode very much.  If it wasn't for
   some parts, this would have been a very good episode.  However, the plot
   was weak at parts and the jokes didn't quite fill it in.  (A-)

Eric Sansoni:  With this episode, written by Al Jean, once again the new work
   of past writers outclasses the work of the freshmen on The Simpsons'
   writing staff.  [...]  He provides a few real laughs, including the utterly
   great visual gag involving the cover of the barbecue manual, then settles
   in to his more cerebral satire.  He sticks with his idea from beginning to
   end, taking it to an ultimate length that is really the least convincing
   part of the episode, but made more palatable with the addition of lots of
   fast-paced extra details.  He may not conclude with the real weight of his
   inspiration, but he finds pleasure in the visuals, and a sweetness between
   Homer and Marge that kept a smile on my face.  (B+)

Alexander S. Woods:  Another far out ending but the Johns' stealing the
   painting saved it.  Way too many art refs:  Mondrian, Warhol, Dali,
   Picasso, Johns', Renoir, and more.  AP Art History pays off!  Family riding
   the couch ala Slim Pickens in Dr. Strangelove was hilarious.  I didn't
   catch the chalkboard--something about an ape and gym class.  (A)

Yours Truly:  One of the better "Homer gets a new job" shows, this episode
   benefits from strong characterization, reasonably realistic plotting, and
   interesting links back to "Brush with Greatness (7F18)."  (And probably
   from Al Jean's influence, as well.)  Homer does an excellent job of being
   boorish enough to entertain, but not so mean he enrages.  Other bonuses are
   lots of material for games of "spot the artist," and good guest appearances
   by Isabella Rossellini and Jasper Johns.  (A-)

AVERAGE GRADE:  B (3.01)   Std Dev.: 0.8308   (29 reviews computed)

==============================================================================
> Comments and other observations
==============================================================================
>> "Simpsons" scene held hostage.  Film at eleven

John Dinsdale:  I taped tomorrow night's new episode off satellite this
   morning (the feed for Canadian TV) and during the title card there was
   something about "Revised version/Hostage Scene Removed".  Does anyone know
   what this missing scene is and why it was cut?  Something to do with
   Kosovo?  I wonder if it's only cut in Canada or will be missing on FOX too,
   and whether it will be reinstated for syndication.


David Brunt:  Maybe the episode was overrunning, and that was a substantial
   cut to bring it down to time.  The title card -- and any other Fox record -
   - may list it to differentiate it from the full version.  Just a
   suggestion.  No, I don't know what it was ... :-)


[When the episode repeated, the scene of the tree with yellow "hostage
   remembrance" ribbons was reinstated. -- Ed.]


Nathan DeHoff:  I think it was removed the first time because the episode was
   aired so soon after the American hostages were taken in Kosovo.  Someone
   mentioned something about a "hostage scene" earlier, and I guess that was
   it.


>> I Think I've Heard His Name Before

Mike Smith recounts Al Jean's history:  Yes, Al Jean is nicknamed "I Murdered
   Mike Reiss" (as referred to in "Treehouse Of Horror IX" [AABF01]).  This is
   his regular episode as a writer, having previously written as a solo
   writer, "Lisa's Sax" (3G02), which is one four 3G episodes produced after
   Season 7 as a filler episode, which didn't air until Season 9.

   But, many OFF fans still remember the classic episodes that Jean & Reiss
   wrote, such as "The Way We Was" (The first flashback episode [7F12]),
   "Stark Raving Dad" (The infamous Michael Jackson episode [7F24]), "Lisa's
   Pony" (The first episode that described the bonding of Homer & Lisa
   [8F06]), Treehouse of Horror II ([8F02]), and III (The "Clown Without Pity"
   segment [9F04]) and "Simpsoncalifragilisticexpiala(Annoyed Grunt)cious"
   (The famous Shari Bobbins episode, which marked their last OFF episode as
   writers [3G03]), as well as "There's No Disgrace Like Home" (7G04), and
   "Moaning Lisa" (7G06).  They also wrote the storyline for "'Round
   Springfield" (2F32).


>> About the title ...

Tom Rinschler explains:  Pop Art is the name given to a style of art of the
   mid-twentieth century.  It was known for taking ordinary, everyday objects,
   and turning them into art. Its most famous practitioner was Andy Warhol,
   who was best known for painting soup labels, one of which Homer was
   drooling over in the museum.  Mr. Warhol himself appeared later in the
   episode, pummeling Homer with the soup cans in the latter's dream.


>> Stargazing

Mike Smith:  Isabella Rossellini is maybe best known for those highly-
   successful miniseries produced under the Hallmark Entertainment banner,
   such "The Odyssey" and "Merlin".  Before she became a star, she was a
   daughter of one of the most-hated marriages in Hollywood history, between
   Ingrid Bergman and Roberto Rossellini.  In fact, according of the IMDB,
   she's twins, since her twin sister is Isotta Rossellini!  Her stepsister is
   film critic Pia Lindstrom.


Andrew Levine adds:  She [also] has appeared in many Italian films, as well as
   "Death Becomes Her" and "Wyatt Earp".


>> Musical References

Gary Wilson:  "Arrivederci Roma," sung by Dean Martin, is played during the
   closing scenes.  [K. Coxnard says it's Vic Damone -- Ed.]


>> Not quite Mom and Pop Hardware ...

Yuri Dieujuste:  Home Depot is a large chain of hardware stores in the United
   States.  They are usually designed as large warehouse like-stores.  If you
   don't understand, just think of a local hardware store as a local corner
   store and Home Depot as a large supermarket.  In fact some Home Depots in
   my area (New York Metro) are open 24/7 or have late closing hours.


>> Carrots vs. Corn -- the debate continues

Todd P. Emerson writes:  Okay, regardless of what Marge told John in "Homer's
   Phobia," tonight's episode should prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that
   those are CARROTS on the Simpsons' kitchen curtains!  Unless they've got
   some really weird-looking cobs of corn there in Springfield ...


Dave Hall:  Unless the people working on the Simpsons staff have bets if we'd
   notice the switch, the curtain pattern has always (at least to my
   knowledge), been a corncob pattern.  Take a look at the beginning of "El
   Viaje Misterioso de Nuestro Homer" you see Marge taking a pair of scissors
   to them.  When she begins to sew you clearly see the yellow ridge outlines
   that make up the cobs and the green ends that make up the stems.

   FYI in Sept '97, Andrew Gore visited the real Simpsons house, the one that
   was given away as part of a Fox network/Kaufman & Broad homebuilders
   contest, in Las Vegas.  Andrew reports the kitchen curtains were a corncob
   pattern.


>> "You heard me, Pear Noël"

Yuri Dieujuste:  Pere Noël is French for Father Christmas.  When you go to
   France, Belgium, Quebec, or other French speaking lands, whenever you hear
   this term, just think Santa Claus.  Personally, I have used to this term
   for people who constantly give things to show off!


>> Portrait of Car Watch

Benjamin Robinson:  An orange VW Old Beetle dodges Homer's runaway grille/art
   project.

   Not so lucky was Astrid Weller's black BMW, which most resembles a 1980's
   vintage 5-series.

   Before Homer entertains his Euro-trash friends, we can see a green Jaguar
   XJ-S in front of Moe's Tavern.


Ben Collins adds:  Judging from the horribly outdated bumper sticker, Homer's
   car must be 10 or more years old.  If that means "10 years ago today," the
   car would be from the late '80s, a lousy time for American cars,
   particularly GM models.  If it's "10 years ago in 1990," Homer drives a
   late '70s / early '80s model, an even lousier time for American cars.


>> I call shotgun!

Ellen Cohen submitted this goof, which I'm repeating here:  wasn't "The
   Cartridge Family" all about Marge insisting that Homer didn't keep a gun in
   the house?  Tonight she saw him wielding a shotgun and didn't so much as
   blink an eye!


Eric Sansoni answers:  Homer also had a gun in the house in "Radio Bart."  In
   my book, "Cartridge Family" is the mistake, especially since I liked it
   less than the conflicting episodes.


... as does "Rilchiam":  He had a shotgun in "$pringfield."


Jonney T. Grunnet responds:  IIRC, all the instances where Homer has a gun
   either before or after "The Cartridge Family" the firearm in question was a
   shotgun.  In "The Cartridge Family" it was a handgun.  Perhaps Marge has a
   problem with just handguns as opposed to shotguns or rifles.  As an example
   to back up my theory; in the episode where Burns is shot, she practically
   has a cow about Grandpa bringing his old Smith and Wesson into the house.
   This kind of plays out in real life since I've known a number of people who
   have owned hunting shotguns or rifles and wouldn't even think about having
   a handgun.


>> Those Never-ending Threads

 - Is Smithers Gay?

Haynes Lee:  [He] got ecstatic when Burns says he's in love.


Gary Wilson:  He rides with Mr. Burns in a swan boat, like two lovers.


>> Louvre:  French Style

Yuri Dieujuste writes:  The Louvre is a large museum in Paris, France.  The
   museum contains the Mona Lisa and the glass pyramids in front of the
   museum.  It is mostly known for blending classical and contemporary designs
   and art work.  Soon, the museum will be going under renovations in some
   areas.  Eventually, they will move the Mona Lisa to a new room for housing.


>> "White Christmas" and green backs

Joe Klemm notes:  Smart move for Mr. Burns buying the copyright to Irving
   Berlin's White Christmas.  The song won an Oscar for Berlin in the 1940's,
   was only one of two songs to have the same performer reach it to the number
   one position in two different years (the other is The Twist by Chubby
   Checker), and, with it usually being played by radio stations around
   Christmas time, would easily help Burns get money for royalties.


Gary Wilson adds:  this song is known for getting incredible sales during the
   Holiday season, year after year


David Brunt adds:  "White Christmas" won the best song Oscar in 1943,
   originally from the 1942 movie "Holiday Inn" of course.  "White Christmas"
   is generally credited as being the world's largest-selling song.  I'm
   fairly sure that Paul McCartney owns the copyright on Berlin's songs.


>> The evils of being gay

Referring to Bart's "confession" to Homer, Andrew Gill writes:  It seems to me
   that the writers have been repeatedly crossing the line with their gay
   "jokes."  It seems to me that they're beginning to insinuate that being gay
   is "wrong."  Sad, when it comes from a series that, two years ago, was
   promoting tolerance.

   Well, there are definitely too many gay jokes on the show lately.  Almost
   every character from Krusty to Homer to Bart to Milhouse has had gay
   references that years ago would have been considered too blatant for even
   Smithers.  I don't really get the joke with these most of the time.  I
   don't think it's necessarily that they're saying being gay is wrong.  That
   doesn't seem to be the point, for instance, of Homer watching Lenny and
   Karl in the shower.  It just seems like these jokes can't work unless
   homosexuality was still a big taboo.  Since it's become pervasive in
   entertainment and the media, these jokes seem pointless and tame now.  And
   the ones that are based on homosexual stereotypes, i.e. male characters
   acting feminine in stereotypical ways, just seem stupid, given our now more
   up-to-date understanding of homosexuality.


>> Art History 101

Benjamin Robinson lectures:  If you watched "Mom and Pop Art" closely enough,
   you could have picked up enough material to impress your art teacher for
   the rest of this semester.  Some of the artists and works mentioned or
   shown [*] include

   Jasper Johns:  When he's not busy guest-voicing on cartoons, Jasper Johns
   is a painter.  Many of his paintings depict flat subjects like flags,
   rulers, and targets.  The public in general liked him because most of the
   paintings resembled what their subjects were "supposed" to look like (that
   is, his flags looked like flags), and weren't ugly.  Art critics liked
   pondering the deep questions his work brought up, like "Does a painting of
   the flag carry the same symbolic weight as an actual flag?"


Stanley Greenberg asks:  Did anyone catch the obscure (except to modern art
   students) reference of Johns stealing light bulbs?  Some of his best early
   pieces were paintings and sculptures of light bulbs.


Andrew Levine:  Rene Magritte (1898-1967):  Was probably the world's most
   important Surrealist painter other than Salvador Dali.  His forte was the
   manipulation of images in such a way as to strip them of their traditional
   meaning and instill a new one; for example, a table sitting on top of an
   apple, rather than the other way around.  Common images in his paintings
   include green apples, round silver bells, and puffy clouds against azure
   skies.  He is most famous for his series of paintings of pipes captioned
   "This is not a pipe" (which is true, since it's a painting and not an
   actual pipe).


David Brunt:  Rene Magritte is frequently hailed as one of the first 1960s
   'Pop Artists', though he usually denied it.

   A lot of his later work features the absence of people's faces -- they were
   usually substituted by other parts of the anatomy or incongruous objects.
   There's one (the name of which eludes me), which has an umbrella emerging
   from a human torso.


Benjamin Robinson continues:  Claes Oldenberg:  Sculptor whose subjects are
   mundane objects, like pencils, blown up to giant size.


Stanley Greenberg:  Marge described [him] as a European artist. Though he was
   born in Sweden, he came to the US when he was 6, and has been a citizen
   since the 1950s.


Benjamin Robinson:  Picasso:  Even Homer probably knows this guy.  As Marge
   helpfully points out, Picasso's art went through several stages, depending
   on his interests at the time.  The Springsonian has that painting of the
   guitarist from his Blue Period, and what I think is called "Les Demoiselles
   d'Avignon" from his abstract phase.  In addition, Burns mentions
   "Guernica," that famous anti-war painting with grief-stricken war victims
   huddled in a barn.

   Mark Rothko:  After Marge mentions Picasso's "angry jerk" period, we can
   see a painting of nesting squares on the wall behind her.  I think this is
   Rothko's "Homage to a Square." Rothko was a minimalist painter, and had
   lots of paintings of squares, solid-colored fields, and the like.

   Piet Mondrian:  Next to the Rothko is a simple painting of colored and
   white squares, separated by heavy black lines.  This is the trademark style
   (or stijl) of Mondrian.  Or maybe they just got a local artist to do one.
   Let's face it, it's an easy style to imitate.

   Andy Warhol:  Pop artist famous for using icons from American everyday life
   (like Campbell's soup cans) in his art.  Warhol was multimedia before that
   term went into mainstream usage.  He has created some of the weirdest
   movies ever made (one was an eight-hour flick of a man sleeping) and has
   some sort of connection with the Velvet Underground.  Warhol's most
   impressive work of art may have been his own life, which he made the focal
   point of an almost constant media circus.  Warhol is the man credited with
   saying, "Everyone will be famous for fifteen minutes."  Evidently, the rule
   didn't apply to himself, since he was famous for years and is still well-
   known today.

   Leonardo Da Vinci:  A Renaissance man, literally and figuratively.  Listed
   here because the four-armed four-legged man is from a drawing of Da
   Vinci's.

   Salvador Dali:  Another surrealist painter.  One of Homer's dreams shows
   the melting watches from "The Persistence of Memory."

   Christo:  Lisa names this artist.  Like she says, he's famous for wrapping
   things.  Once, he surrounded an island with hundreds of square yards of
   plastic sheeting -- it just floated around the shoreline like a pink pool
   cover.  Yeah, I don't get it either, but Christo says the idea is to get
   art out of museums and out into the world where people can appreciate it.
   Recently, he even managed to span the Pacific Ocean, installing giant
   yellow umbrellas both in California, as Lisa said, and in Japan.  Sadly,
   some people were killed when a storm loosed some of the California
   umbrellas from their moorings.


Ben Collins adds:  The California umbrellas were put up in September-October,
   1992 (I think).  As any Southern Californian knows, that's the Santa
   Ana/Brush Fire season, where powerful, hot, dry desert winds add to the
   already dangerous fuel of dried brush from the spring and summer to cause
   fires.  At least one person, a woman from Camarillo, CA, was killed when an
   umbrella struck her.  The umbrellas were promptly taken down.


On a happier note, Dale G. Abersold writes:  I lived in Berlin when the long
   Reichstag project was nearing its end (Christo and his wife had begun
   planning the project in 1971).  There was quite a bit of political
   opposition to it: If I recall correctly, it was the (then) ruling Christian
   Democrats who were primarily opposed.  Finally in June 1995 they wrapped
   the building up.  Christo definitely succeeded in getting people to come
   out and see art for themselves: 5 million people came to look at "Wrapped
   Reichstag, Berlin 1971-1995" (as the artwork was officially named).
   Unfortunately, that was three years after I left Berlin.  D'oh!


Benjamin Robinson:  Matt Groening:  Subversive cartoonist, and the man behind
   "Life in Hell."  Groening was actually trained as a writer, not an artist,
   and so his work relies more on witty dialog and sharp satire than on his
   almost sketchy artwork.


>> Art imitates ... art

Why waste time going to an art museum when you can just watch "The Simpsons?"
   Tom Rinschler presents, "Works of Art I Noticed and Know the Title of":
   "Guernica" by Picasso --  Burns nearly bought this.  [We don't see it, but
   Andrew Gill notes it's a "horrific painting of the bombing of that town
   during the Spanish Civil War" -- Ed.]

   "Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte" by Georges Seurat --
   Barney's "drawing."

   From the sketchbooks of Leonardo da Vinci -- the man with four arms and
   legs who pummels Homer.

   "The Persistence of Memory" by Salvador Dali -- the watch melting on Homer.

   A copy of the "Discus Thrower" by Myron -- statue in the museum.


Jonathan M. Gladstone:  One [from the museum] was Picasso's "The Three
   Musicians".


Andrew Levine:  "Les Demoiselles D'Avignon" by Pablo Picasso (painting with
   five women)

   "Composition with Red, Blue, and Yellow" by Piet Mondrian (Red, blue and
   yellow squares with black lines).

   "Vitruvian Man" by Leonardo Da Vinci (sketch that beats up Homer in his
   dream).

   "Guernica" is Pablo Picasso's.


>> You could call him annoying ...

Don Del Grande tells us who Ray Jay Johnson is:  He was a regular on Redd
   Foxx's variety show back in 1977.  His entire gimmick went like this: when
   someone called him "Mr. Johnson", he replied:

   Oh, you doesn't has to call me Mr. Johnson!
   My name is Raymond J. Johnson, Jr.
   Now you can call me Ray
   Or you can call me Jay
   Or you can call me Johnny
   Or you can call me Sonny
   Or you can call me Junie
   Or you can call me Ray-Jay
   Or you can call me R.J.
   Or you can call me R.J.J.
   Or you can call me R.J.J.Junior
   But you doesn't has to call me Mr. Johnson!

   (In "Krusty Gets Kancelled", he's called Ray-Jay Johnson.)

   [Don concludes with, "I guess there IS such a thing as "knowing too much
   trivia" after all ..." -- Ed.]


John Jensen adds:  Then several years ago he did some TV commercials, reviving
   the schtick, and then in the last spot for the campaign a hot babe called
   him Mr Johnson and he said "Now SHE can call me Mr Johnson."  Don't worry,
   it wasn't that funny being there either.


>> Floor mat physics

Andrew Gill debunks Homer's plan for conceptual art:  First off, the floor
   mats wouldn't stop all of that water from going down into the sewers,
   unless it caught a whole bunch of leaves and crap. They also might have
   disintegrated, and stopped up the grates.  The sewers wouldn't take the
   load, and would back up, so this is probably an indication that Springfield
   has storm sewers, or else people would be quite unhappy about the things
   floating in the streets of Springfield.  For you Where Is Springfield
   types--only newer cities (like since 1970) have storm sewers.

   The water company would get alarms when the tanks dropped below a certain
   level, and go out to see what the problem was, and so shut off the
   hydrants.  Or so says my dad, Executive Director of the State College
   Borough Water Auth.

   Finally, the sewers aren't the only places where water goes.  The ground
   would soak up all of that water.  Unless, of course, the water is being
   contained by the state parks around Springfield.  Astroturf is laid on a
   foundation of cement, remember.


>> That *is* easier than getting into Heaven

Andrew Gill can't provide the entrance requirements for Paradise, but he can
   tell us what it takes to get into Arizona State:  General Entrance
   Requirements Arizona-resident Freshmen must: Rank in the top quarter of
   their high school class OR Score 22 on the ACT or 1040 on the SAT I OR Have
   a 3.0 GPA (4.0=A)*

   Non-resident Freshmen must: Rank in the top quarter of their high school
   class OR Score 24 on the ACT or 1110 on the SAT I OR Have a 3.0 GPA
   (4.0=A)*

   (from: <http://www.asu.edu/admissions/frereq.html>)


>> Miscellaneous, Etc.

The Haynes Lee alterna-title for this episode is:  Mondo Art


Jordan Eisenberg's Alterna-alterna-title:  "Homer Improvement"


Yuri Dieujuste:  The Reichstag is the German Parliament house.


Jordan Eisenberg:  The scene in the previews in which Homer mangles Moe's
   jukebox for not accepting pesos joins the long line of footage forever lost
   on the cutting room floor, and the VCRs of people who taped the previous
   week's credits.  :-)


Dave Hall contributes the next two items:  Outsider Art could be by:  Mental
   patent, Hillbilly, or Chimpanzee.

   The Simpsons roll their TP over-handed.


Andrew Gill:  Ray Jay Johnson probably *is* more popular, these days.


Joe Klemm:  Toys For Tots is a charitable organization which supplies toys for
   needy children in the USA.  Most of their collections happen around
   Christmas, where bins are placed so that way people can drop their
   donations off in there.


Haynes Lee:  Floods [are] also called high-water pants which nerds preferred
   to wear during the 1970s.


==============================================================================
> Quotes and Scene Summary  {jp}
==============================================================================
% Homer relaxes in the backyard hammock wearing a festive shirt and straw hat.
% He pours a can of Duff into a coconut half.  Another beer is on a table
% beside him.

Homer: [singing] You put the beer in the coconut and drink it all up.  You put
       the beer in the coconut and throw the can away.  [throws can over
       fence, hitting Ned Flanders]
Ned:   Homer!
Homer: [pours other can into coconut] You throw the can away.  [hits Ned with
       the other can]
Ned:   I said, Homer!
Homer: You throw the can away.  [reaches for another can, but there is none]
       Marge!  I'm out of beer!
       [Ned walks away]
Marge: [pulling weeds] You know, Homie, a lot of men use their Saturdays to do
       things around the house -- hint, hint!
Homer: But, Marge, I'm not like other men; that's why you buy my pants at that
       special store!  [snaps his waistband]
Marge: I'm serious.  You never finished painting the garage...
       [Garage door has corner painted blue with the note "Start here tomorrow
       7/17/95"]
       ...and you could at least get that snake out of the piano.
       [The piano seemingly plays itself, then a snake peeks out the top]
Homer: Fine.  I'll drop everything I'm doing just for you, but you'll have to
       live with the guilt of ruining my Saturday.  Can you live with that,
       Marge?  Huh?  Can ya?
Marge: Yup.
Homer: Can ya?!
       [Marge gives him a stern look; Homer groans and throws his coconut over
       the fence and hits Ned]
Ned:   [annoyed] God--!  [cheerful] bless him!
-- "Mom and Pop Art"

% Homer and Bart go to Mom & Pop Hardware -- a subsidiary of Global Dynamics,
% Inc.  They walk over to a teenager wearing a hammer hat.

Homer: Excuse me.  I have a few questions for Pop.
Teen:  That's me.
Bart:  You're Pop?!  No offense, but even I could kick your ass.
Teen:  Hey, get off my case.  The only reason I'm working here is 'cause I'm
       trying to get a date with Mom.
       ["Mom" files her fingernails on a grinder while smoking]
Homer: Look, Pop, I'm planning some expert home repairs and I need a pair of
       bolt cutters, or wire cutters, or something to get the lock off my
       toolbox.
Teen:  Aisle 1, next to the cat poison.
-- "Mom and Pop Art"

% Edna Krabapple and Seymour Skinner, are nearby in the lighting aisle.

Skinner: Edna, look!  A dimmer switch could ratchet up the romance in our love
         nest.
Edna:    You mean the janitor's closet?  Ha!
Skinner: Oh, what's the matter, Edna?  Lately you just say "ha" to everything.
Edna:    I want a baby!  Now!
         [They notice Bart watching them]
Skinner: Why don't we continue this in pool supplies?
-- "Mom and Pop Art"

% Homer gets distracted by a TV display for barbecue pits.

Doug:  Hi, I'm Doug Vaccaro.  You know me as Chip, the wisecracking assistant
       on the hit sitcom "Toolin' Around".
Homer: Tih!  A man in an apron!  [chuckles]
Doug:  But today, I'm here as a "tool" of Global Dynamics Corp.  You know,
       installing your own barbecue pit is no harder than adding an aviary or
       Olympic-size swimming pool.  In fact, it's a snap.  [snaps fingers; a
       barbecue pit with a chicken on the rotisserie appears]  Or, if you're
       not into chicken...
Homer: No, no!  I'm into chicken!
Doug:  ...how about wild boar?  Or swordfish?  Or hippo?  [snaps fingers after
       each food, causing it to appear on the rotisserie]
Homer: Mmm ... hippo.
Anncr: Lighthearted apron not included.  Snapping fingers may not make food
       appear.
Homer: How about it, Bart?  Would you like a new backyard barbecue pit?
Bart:  Can I burn evidence in it?
Homer: We can *all* burn evidence in it.
-- Homer falls for an advertisement again, "Mom and Pop Art"

% Back at the house, with the concrete foundation for the barbecue pit done,
% Homer brushes off his hands.  He then takes over the construction job from
% Lisa, who's the one who had been working.
%
% Homer picks up the box to admire what the finished product should look like.
% Then the bottom of the box opens and the contents drop into the wet cement.
% Homer quickly removes the stuff and puts it on top of a wheelbarrow full of
% bricks.  The wheelbarrow tips over, spilling everything in the cement.
% Homer curses Lisa, then sets out to build the whole thing before the cement
% dries.  He finds the instructions, but the English side is covered with
% cement, so he looks at the French side and can't figure that out either.
% And so, Homer frantically cements together whatever he happens to grab.
%
% Later, Homer marvels at one perfectly built barbecue pit.  He puts down the
% box and sees his pile of parts.  "Why doesn't mine look like that?!" he
% hollers.  He picks up a crowbar and starts beating on the junk pile in a fit
% of rage.

Why?!  Why must life be so hard?  Why must I fail at every attempt at masonry?
-- Homer, further damaging his barbecue pit, "Mom and Pop Art"

% In the kitchen, Marge asks Bart how Homer's project is coming.  Bart says
% that he thinks he's almost done.  Out the window, Homer charges at his
% project with an umbrella.  The umbrella gets lodged in and opens as Homer
% falls backwards onto the ground.  "Yeah, he's done," says Bart.
%
% Back at the hardware store, Homer brings his barbecue pit in a cart.  He
% walks up to "Mom" and "Pop", who are kissing.

Homer: I'd like to return this barbecue kit.
Teen:  All returned items must be in a box and accompanied by a receipt.
Homer: [shines a flashlight into the conglomeration] Well, if you'll follow
       the flashlight, you'll see the receipt embedded here and here, and
       elements of the box here, here, and possibly here.
Teen:  Sorry, I didn't get this hammer hat by handing out refunds.
-- Homer tries to return his failed barbecue pit, "Mom and Pop Art"

% Homer gives up trying to get his money back and would be content just to get
% rid of his junk barbecue pit.  He tries to stuff it into a Toys for Tots bin
% when Chief Wiggum taps him on the shoulder with his nightstick.

Wiggum: Yeah, hold on there, Santa Claus.  That box is for toys only.
Homer:  Well, of course!  Any kid would love to have this ... activity center.
        It teaches them while they learn!
Wiggum: Yeah, nice try, Saint Nick.  Now hit the road, Kris Kringle!
Homer:  But ... but...
Wiggum: You heard me [pokes Homer's gut with nightstick] pear Noel.
        [Homer gives up and puts the barbecue pit on the cart and leaves; Fat
        Tony, Legs, and Louie come and dump a body in a bag into the bin]
        Whatcha got there?
Louie:  Beanie Baby.
-- Trying to get rid of stuff, "Mom and Pop Art"

% Homer drives with the barbecue pit on the cart tied to the rear bumper
% behind the car.  Homer looks at the terrible thing in the rear view mirror.

Homer: I'll never get rid of it.  It'll follow me to the end of the earth!
       [The car hits a bump and the rear bumper falls off along with the
       barbecue pit]
       Alright!  My bumper fell off!
       [Many cars swerve out of the way of the junk]
       Not my fault!  Act of God, act of God!  [chuckles]
       [The bumper hits a car and the barbecue pit lands on the hood]
       Uh-oh.  [adjusts rear view mirror from the view of the wreck to some
       deer] Ah.  [continues driving]
-- Homer finally rids himself of his barbecue pit, "Mom and Pop Art"

% Back home, Homer shaves his shoulders in the master bathroom when Marge
% comes in.

Homer: [singing] Shavin' my shoulders.  I'm gettin' it all shaved off.
Marge: Homie, someone's at the door.  They want to talk to you about some sort
       of car accident?
Homer: Take the kids out back.  [pulls shotgun from behind the water closet]
       I'll handle this.  [cocks gun]
-- "Mom and Pop Art"

% Homer walks don the stairs where a woman is waiting for him.

Woman:  Mr. Simpson?
        [Homer sets down the shotgun in Maggie's crib]
        I believe something of yours struck my car yesterday.
Homer:  Oh, yeah?  Prove it.
Woman:  [opens front door revealing the barbecue pit and bumper] That's your
        license plate, isn't it?
Homer:  Um ... [sobbing] alright, just go ahead and sue me!  Everybody else
        does!  The average settlement is $68,000.
Woman:  I'm not here to sue you.  My name is Astrid Weller.  I own an art
        gallery and I'd love to display your piece.
Homer:  You mean this hunk o' junk?  This isn't art; it's the barbecue that
        pushed me over the edge.  [shaking fist] Didn't you?  Didn't you?!
        You stupid --  [kicks a pipe sticking out of it, bending it]
Astrid: Art isn't just pretty pictures; it's an expression of raw human
        emotion -- in your case, rage.
Homer:  Oh, I got that, lady.
Marge:  [peeks around the corner of the house] Is everything okay?  [so do the
        three kids] I got worried when I didn't hear any shots.
Homer:  This lady says I'm an artist.
Marge:  You?  An artist?
Astrid: Your husband's work is what we call "outsider art".  It could be by a
        mental patient, or a hillbilly, or a chimpanzee.
Homer:  [gasps] In high school I was voted most likely to *be* a mental
        patient, hillbilly, or chimpanzee!
Astrid: Well, you should be very excited because outsider art couldn't be
        hotter.
Homer:  So you'd better catch the fever!  [shakes fist at Bart] Catch it!
-- Homer gets his week's calling, "Mom and Pop Art"

% At the Louvre: American Style, the Simpsons look at all the outsider art on
% display, except Homer, who munches the snacks.

Lisa:  Dad, chew with your mouth closed.  You're losing your mystique.
Homer: Lisa, all great artists love free food.  Check out Jasper Johns.
Johns: [stuffing food in his jacket] You squeal on me, I'll kill you.
-- "Mom and Pop Art"

% Marge looks at Homer's piece.

Marge:    I don't know.  I studied art for years, but I just don't get this.
Bart:     Sounds like somebody's jealous.
Marge:    No I'm not!  I just can't believe some people are paying hundreds of
          dollars for something a hillbilly pulled out of the trash.
Cletus:   Hey, I done studied for years on how to get over that junkyard fence
          ... then I learnt the gate was open.
          [Mr. Burns and Smithers walk over to Homer's piece of art]
Burns:    Smithers, I think I'm in love!
          [Smithers gasps happily]
          ...with this sculpture!
Smithers: Sir, that's by Homer Simpson; I don't think you want to buy it.
Burns:    Smithers, years ago I blew the chance to buy Picasso's "Guernica"
          for a song!  Luckily, that song was "White Christmas", and by
          hanging onto it I made billions.  Anyway, I love this hideous thing.
          Young lady, I'll take it!  [hands Astrid a check]
Astrid:   Congratulations, Homer.  You're now a professional artist.
Homer:    Whoo hoo!  Look, Marge, my first sale!  In your face, Jasper Johns!
          [Jasper Johns, interrupted from stealing a light bulb from a
          fixture, runs away]
-- Homer sells his dealie, "Mom and Pop Art"

% [End of Act One.  Act Time: 8:26  Running Time: 8:26]
%
% While Marge and the kids eat in the dining room, Homer pulls a heap of stuff
% through.

Lisa:  Where are you going with that junk, Dad?
Homer: I'm gonna be an outsider artist.  That way I can turn all these old
       baseball cards, Disney memorabilia, and antiques into something
       valuable.
Marge: Homie, I'm really happy you sold your sculpture, but don't you think it
       may have been a fluke?
Homer: Hey, I've always had an interest in art, dating back to my schoolgirl
       days when I painted portrait after portrait of Ringo Starr.
Marge: That's *my* life you're describing!
Homer: I think I remember my own life, Marge.
-- "Mom and Pop Art"

% Homer stands in the garage with Bart, Lisa, and a big lump of clay.

Homer: Astrid said the key to my art is anger, but you know me -- I'm Mr.
       Mellow, so I'm giving you kids permission to get me mad.  Come on, give
       me what you got.
Lisa:  Well, if it'll help ... Mom found out her engagement ring is made of
       rock candy.
Homer: [hits the clay with a stick and his fist] Good work, honey.  Keep it
       coming.
Bart:  Well, I'm flunking math, and the other day I was a little attracted to
       Milhouse.
       [Homer wails and beats the clay]
-- The art studio, "Mom and Pop Art"

% At Moe's.

Homer:  Moe, this is Astrid, my dealer, and these are my fans: Gunter, Kilto,
        and Cecil Hamstead on Cecil Cecil.
Moe:    So, uh, you guys are Euro trash, huh?  How's that, uh, workin' out for
        ya?
Gunter: Eh, to be honest, we are a drift in a sea of decadent luxury and
        meaningless sex.
Moe:    Uh-huh ... so where might this sea be located?
Cecil:  I must be back to my hotel and practice my affectations for tomorrow.
        Bon soir!
Homer:  What do we owe you, Moe?
Moe:    Nothing, nothing.  Just gimme a priceless sketch with a certificate of
        authenticity.
Homer:  Alright.  [scribbles on paper]
Barney: Hey, Moe, can I pay with a drawing?
Moe:    Nice try there, twelve step.
        [Barney groans and drops a copy of Seurat's "Sunday Afternoon on La
        Grande Jatte"]
-- "Mom and Pop Art"

% At the power plant, Homer tries his hand at figure drawing by sketching
% Lenny and Carl while they're showering.
%
% Back in the garage, Homer jams a chainsaw into a metal shelf.  Marge brings
% Astrid in.

Marge:  Here he is.  This is where the "magic" happens.
Astrid: Wonderful news, Homer.
Homer:  Is it about pies?
Astrid: Uh ... no.   We're going to hold a show devoted entirely to you.
Homer:  Wow!  It's like Marge's dream come true ... for me!  Isn't that great,
        Marge ... for me?
-- Uh ... no?, "Mom and Pop Art"

% Homer and Marge sit in bed.  Homer reads a book.

Homer: Look, Marge.  They're advertising my show in "Art in America".  It's
       the first time I've been mentioned there ... that I know of.
Marge: I'm happy for you.  Now, good night.
Homer: Good night.  [turns off light, then turns it on again] You're upset
       about something.  Is this about that trip Barney and I took to Maccu
       Piccu?
Marge: Oh, Homer, being an artist was *my* dream, but now, without even
       trying, you've accomplished more in a week than I have in my whole
       life.
Homer: Oh, honey, I've always liked your art.  Your paintings look like the
       things they look like.
Marge: That's sweet, but how would you like it if I -- I don't know -- entered
       a belching contest.
Homer: Frankly, I'd be a little turned on.
Marge: You don't understand.
Homer: Marge, I've screwed up everything I've ever done.  I mean, look at
       Bart.  But I've finally found something where people worship me for
       screwing up, and that feels pretty good.
Marge: Well, I guess nothing else matters as long as *you're* happy.
Homer: Now you're makin' sense.  Good night.  [turns off light and goes to
       sleep as Marge continues glaring]
-- "Mom and Pop Art"

% At Homer's solo show, people chat as they wait to see Homer's new stuff.
% Astrid comes from behind a curtain.

Astrid: Homer is the most dangerous artist on the Springfield scene.  Now
        let's see what surprises he has for us tonight.
        [The curtain opens revealing Homer and three sculptures]
Homer:  I give you "Botched Hibachi".  The tricycle's on loan from the Maggie
        Simpson collection.  This piece I call "Failed Shelving Unit with
        Stupid Stuck Chainsaw and Applesauce".  And finally, my thing de
        resistance, "Attempted Birdhouse One".
        [A bird squawks inside]
        Shall we start the bidding at, say, $10,000?
        [silence]
        Alright, how about a million?
Moe:    I'll give you two bucks for the bird if it's still alive.
        [close-up of birdhouse, which reveals no sign of life]
Homer:  [to Astrid and fans] What's going on here?  You weirdoes love this
        stuff.
Astrid: Homer, I'm afraid they only love what's new and shocking.  These
        pieces are just like your earlier work.
Gunter: You've gone from hip to boring.  Why don't you call us when you get to
        kitsch?  [forced laugh]
Cecil:  Come on, Gunter, Kilto.  If we hurry, we can still catch the heroin
        craze.
        [Everyone who came to see Homer's show leaves]
Homer:  Come back!  I'm a god to you!  Worship me or fear my wrath!  Oh,
        please fear my wrath!  Please.  Call me.
-- Homer's junk is no longer art, "Mom and Pop Art"

% [End of Act Two.  Act Time: 5:04  Running Time: 13:30]
%
% Homer lies down in the middle of the living room.  Marge and Lisa sit on the
% couch.

Homer: Why don't people like my art anymore?
Marge: Homer, I know you worked hard, but all of your ... things were kind of
       the same.
Homer: Hey, Ray Jay Johnson never changed his act, and he's more popular now
       than he's ever been.
Lisa:  Who?
Homer: "You can call him Ray, or you can call him Jay, or you can call him Ray
       Jay, but you doesn't have to call him"--
Lisa:  I'm sick of him already.
Marge: The point is, great artists are always trying new things, like
       Michelangelo or Shaquille O'Neal.  You just need some inspiration.
-- "Mom and Pop Art"

% Homer and Marge walk down the halls of the Springsonian Museum.

Marge:  It's so exciting to do something cultural together.
Homer:  [looks at a drawing of Akbar and Jeff] Matt Groening?!  What's he
        doing in a museum?  He can barely draw!
        [A giant pencil eraser starts rubbing Homer's head]
        Oh no!  I'm being erased!
        [Two people hold the giant pencil]
Worker: Move it, bub!  We got an installation to installate.
Marge:  Mmm!  A Claes Oldenberg!  He's a European who defied convention and
        embraced American popular culture.
Homer:  [whistles] He must be a hundred feet tall.
Marge:  Now, this is a Joseph Turner.  In an era when everyone else painted
        portraits, he broke away by painting the Venetian canals.
Homer:  It's glorious!  The streets are paved with water!  You could ride a
        walrus to work!
Marge:  And Picasso started out painting realistically, then moved on to
        cubism.  By the end of his life, he was just painting crank letters to
        the editor.  They call it his angry jerk period.
Homer:  [Staring at a Warhol Campbell's Soup print, drooling] Mmm ... Split
        Pea ... [gasps] with ham!
Marge:  Any ideas yet?
Homer:  No, these guys are geniuses.  I could never think of something like
        soup or a pencil.  [groans] I'm just gonna rest for a minute.  [lies
        down on a bench and falls asleep]
-- Looking for inspiration, "Mom and Pop Art"

% Homer dreams of waking up in Rousseau's "The Sleeping Gypsy" when the lion
% licks his head.  Da Vinci's universal man rolls over to punch and kick Homer.
% Picasso's three musicians shoot Homer with machine guns.  Then one of Dali's
% clocks drips on him.  Andy Warhol himself starts throwing cans of soup at
% Homer and is about to throw a massive can at him.  Homer tries to talk Andy
% out of it as Marge wakes him up for real.

Why does art hate me?  I never did anything to art.  [lifts arm, which is
through the Warhol soup print]  Oop.  Let's get out of here.
-- Homer, "Mom and Pop Art"

% Homer lies in the middle of the living room again with Lisa on the couch.

Lisa:  Well, Dad, if the museum didn't inspire you, maybe you should do
       something *really* radical like Christo.
Homer: Is he that jerk that revealed the magicians' secrets?
Lisa:  No, Christo is a conceptual artist who does huge outdoor projects.  He
       once wrapped the Reichstag in plastic.
Homer: Not the Reichstag!
Lisa:  Oh, yes, and he also set up hundreds of yellow umbrellas along the
       California highway.
Homer: Why did he do that?
Lisa:  To make the world a more magical place, I guess.  [sadly] Although they
       did blow over and kill some people.
Homer: Killer umbrellas!  Of course!  Exquisite.
Lisa:  No, Dad, no, my point is you have to do something big and daring!
Homer: Big?  Daring?  Lisa, that's it!  I've got an idea for a wonderful art
       project that'll make everyone love me again.  Step one: steal all the
       doormats in town.
-- "Mom and Pop Art"

% That night, Homer gets Bart to go along with him to do the art project.
% They throw the doormats out the car windows covering up street drains.

Bart:  Hit the road, "Welcome home"!
Homer: Adiós, "Casa de Flanders"!
Bart:  See you in Hell, "God bless this house"!
Homer: So long, "The Simpsons"!  ...D'oh!
-- Throwing doormats, "Mom and Pop Art"

% For step two, they stop at the zoo to put snorkels on the animals.  Homer
% finishes the goats and pigs.  Bart reports back after snorkeling the bears.
% Homer then goes to do the pony, letting Bart do the lions.
%
% Step three: Homer opens all the fire hydrants, flooding the street.

Bart:  Are you sure this is art and not vandalism?
Homer: That's for the courts to decide, Son.
-- Homer finishes his art project, "Mom and Pop Art"

% In the morning, the city is flooded at least a story high.  The oatmeal
% factory bursts open with oatmeal.  Homer announces on a megaphone to wake up
% to see his surprise.  Marge wakes up worried, and her fears are not helped
% by a dolphin jumping outside her bedroom window.

Homer:  [on a raft outside] People of Springfield, behold my latest work!
Marge:  Homer, what have you done?!
Homer:  It's conceptual art.  "The Grand Canals of Springfield", just like
        Venice, without the black plague.  What do you think?
Marge:  I think some people are going to be upset.
Astrid: [floating on a log] I love it, Homer!  You've turned this town into a
        work of art!  I just wish Jasper Johns hadn't stolen my boat.
Johns:  [speeds by on a motorboat, splashing Astrid] So long, suckers!
Marge:  Well, they're in the business.  Real people might not be so
        understanding.
Ned:    [next door] What the flood?!  Maude, it's a miracle!  The Lord has
        drowned the wicked and spared the righteous.
Maude:  [gasps] Isn't that Homer Simpson?
Ned:    Looks like Heaven's easier to get into than Arizona State.
-- People respond to Homer's flooding, "Mom and Pop Art"

% Milhouse stands in his room wearing pants with the cuffs rolled up.

[groans] I hate these flood pants.  [opens door and water comes in up to his
ankles] Hey, they're working!  My feet are soaked, but my cuffs are bone dry!
Everything's comin' up Milhouse!  [struts out]
-- Milhouse, "Mom and Pop Art"

% The rising flood water relieves everyone in the burn ward.  Everyone else
% enjoys traveling through the water in creative boats.  Seymour and Edna are
% in a boat being rowed by Luigi.

Skinner: Edna, I'm gonna pop you a question, and I hope the answer is yes.
         Do you think Mother would like this hat pin?
Edna:    [disappointed, annoyed] Oh.  Yes.
Skinner: Oh, you've made me the happiest man on earth!
-- "Mom and Pop Art"

% On the Simpsons' roof, Bart feeds popcorn to the snorkeled zoo animals and
% Marge paints the scene.  Homer rows over.

Marge: Well, Homer, I have to admit, you created something people really love.
       You truly are an artist.
Homer: No, I'm just a nut who couldn't build a barbecue.  You'll always be the
       artist in the family.  [looks at Marge's canvas] It that our house?
Marge: Yup.
Homer: And is that us on the roof?
Marge: That's us.
Homer: Are we kissing?
Marge: Oh, I don't know.  Could be.  I need some inspiration.  [they kiss]
Johns: [comes up on his boat, climbs on the Simpsons' roof and steals Marge's
       painting] Yoink!  [gets back in his boat and takes off as Homer and
       Marge continue to kiss]
-- The end, "Mom and Pop Art"

% "Arrivederci Roma" plays as the credits roll.
%
% [End of Act Three.  Act Time: 6:49  Running Time: 20:19]

==============================================================================
> Contributors
==============================================================================
{ag}  Andrew Gill
{am}  A Michelson
{asw} Alexander S. Woods
{bc}  Ben Collins
{bjr} Benjamin Robinson
{cg}  Curtis Gibby
{ddg} Don Del Grande
{dh}  Dave Hall
{dj}  Darrel Jones
{eac} Ellen A. Cohen
{eg}  Erin Grober
{er}  Evan Ross
{es}  Eric Sansoni
{gw}  Gary Wilson
{hl}  Haynes Lee
{je}  Jordan Eisenberg
{jg}  Jeremy Gallen
{jp}  Jerry P.
{mr}  Matt Rose
{ms}  Mike Smith
{tmh} Tyler McHenry
{tr}  Tom Rinschler
{yd}  Yuri Dieujuste

==============================================================================
> Legal Mumbo Jumbo
==============================================================================
This episode capsule is Copyright 2001 Benjamin Robinson.  It is not to be
redistributed in a public forum without consent from its author or current
maintainer (capsules@snpp.com).  All quoted material and episode summaries
remain property of The Simpsons, Copyright of Twentieth Century Fox.  All
other contributions remain the properties of their respective authors.  The
Quote and Scene Summary itself is Copyright 2001 Jerry P.  This capsule has
been brought to you by The Springsonian Institute's Museum of Modern Art.

This work is dedicated to Raymond Chen, James A. Cherry, Ricardo Lafaurie,
Frederic Briere, and all of those who made episode capsules what they are
today.