The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular Written by Penny Wise Directed by Pound Foolish =============================================================================== Production code: 3F31 Original airdate in N.A.: 3-Dec-95 Capsule revision D, 22-Feb-97 =============================================================================== > Title sequence =============================================================================== % A drumroll sounds. Announcer: Live, from the Springfield Civic Auditorium -- it's the Simpsons 138th episode spectacular! [trumpet fanfare as Troy McClure walks on] Troy: [walking on] Hello, I'm Troy McClure. You may remember me from such Fox network specials as "Alien Nose Job" and "Five Fabulous Weeks of `The Chevy Chase Show'". Tonight we're here to honor America's favorite non- prehistoric cartoon family. You'll see long lost footage, never-before-seen material from your favorite episodes, old favorites you can't see in syndication. [clips of MG07, 8F13, 2F20, and 9F03 run quickly] So join me, won't you, for the Simpsons 138th episode spectacular. -- Troy's introduction, "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" % Over the opening shot of Springfield, "23% New Footage" appears on the % screen. Blackboard :- I will only do this once a year. I will only do this once a year/ at cutoff. Lisa's Solo:- Heard, but not seen. {rl} Couch :- [8F18] giant brown slug :- [9F02] running off the edge of the frame :- [9F10] everyone in Springfield runs in to watch TV :- [9F09] everyone very small :- [8F09] SLH growling on couch :- [1F02] Monty Python foot :- [2F31] Maggie largest, Homer smallest :- [2F09] Escher "Relativity" :- [2F06] running down perspective hallway :- [1F17] carpet is water :- [2F11] black and white/Michey Mouse :- [9F08] chorus line % [End of Credits. Time: 2:17] =============================================================================== > Did you notice... =============================================================================== Mark Richey: ... we learn how to say "Groening"? ... Smithers actually does look like a lemur in the WSMB outtake? ... there were no "syndication cut-outs" as promised? Haynes Lee: ... Mr. Brooks looks like the tycoon from Monopoly? ... Mr. Simon looks like the eccentric Howard Hughes? ... the message in Homer's skull: "IOU one brain, signed, God"? Benjamin Robinson: ... after showing the first short, Troy pauses a bit, as if taken aback by what he just saw? ... Satan's Formula 1 car was sponsored by Duff beer and Laramie cigarettes? ... Lionel Hutz's pizza is from "Jackie McLean Pizza & Jazz?" ... the dreaded robotic Richard Simmons is almost as fat as Homer? Keith Palmer: ... the comics that Matt Groening was supposed to have worked on all have Bongo Comics seals? ... Santa's Little Helper holds the gun in his mouth to shoot Mr. Burns in one of the fake shootings? ... all of the fake shootings have the same background and animation of Burns? ... as one of the commercial breaks begins, Troy walks just off stage, seems to become depressed, and lights a cigarette? (He likely didn't care for the episode.) Dominik Halas: ... the living room has been moved? (the arched doorway normally leads into the kitchen, not the hallway.) ... Groening is dressed just like Grampa? (unlike Grampa, he wears an eyepatch and recognizes all 50 states) ... Brooks has two Emmies and an Oscar? ... the Life in Hell poster in Groening's office? Don Del Grande: ... in the list of names, some appear more than once (like Vyolet Diaz and Marty Gross)? ... Apu fires more than one shot at Burns, so he couldn't have done it since only one shot was heard? ... whoever did do it used the same bullets as the gun found in Homer's car? ... "Good Night" has a FOX logo in the corner, but FOX had not started using it in 1987? Ricardo Lafaurie: ... unlike the past two clip shows, this episode did not credit the collaborative efforts of the writers of the clips shown? ... Troy neglects to mention "Life in Hell" as one of Groening's comics? ... Penny Wise is on the list of people who worked on the Simpsons? ... this episode confirms that Dr. Marvin Monroe is dead? ... this is the first episode to show episode titles (of other episodes, though)? ... Homer runs over Bart's bike? ... Apu carries an automatic weapon? ... apparently, Troy doesn't know that next season is the Simpsons' last? ... in the nudity scene from 2F07, Marge and Homer seem to have no genitals? =============================================================================== > Voice credits =============================================================================== - Starring - Dan Castellaneta (Homer, Krusty, James Bond) - Julie Kavner (Marge) - Nancy Cartwright (Bart) - Yeardley Smith (Lisa) - Hank Azaria (announcer, post office employee, Race Banyon, network man 2, Apu, Indian man in film) - Harry Shearer (Smithers, Burns, network man 1, Blofeld, Flanders) - Special Guest Voice - Buzz Aldrin (himself) - Glenn Close (Mother Simpson) - Liz Georges (Maggie in MG01) [not credited - ed] {ddg} - Phil Hartman (Troy McClure, Lionel Hutz) - Also Starring - Pamela Hayden (Lizzy Borden) - Tress MacNeille (Indian singing woman) =============================================================================== > Movie (and other) references not already listed elsewhere =============================================================================== + "Alien Autopsy" - "Alien Nose Job" refers to the actual alien special aired on Fox recently + "The Chevy Chase Show" - there never was a Fox special devoted to this show, that literally lasted five weeks + "Patton" {rl} - "Matt Groening's picture" is on a backdrop of the US flag, like the movie + "The Flintstones" - Troy refers to the Simpsons as "America's favorite non-prehistoric cartoon family" + Howard Hughes - Sam Simon looks just like him + Madonna's "Sex" book - Krusty's "Sex" book a clear parody + "Casino Royale" and other Bond movies - James Bond gambling looks similar (it was Chemin de Fer in the original film {ddg}) + Domino's Pizza - "30 minutes or it's free" from Lionel Hutz (see below) + Richard Simmons - well, duh + "Terminator 2" - Richard Simmons robot's eye reforming very similar to T1000 + the OJ Simpson trial - Troy's comment about the nuttiness of ignoring Simpson DNA evidence, just as was done in the trial =============================================================================== > Previous episode references not already listed elsewhere =============================================================================== - [SC04] Has a comic named "It's In The Cards" (cf. Troy saying comedy was "in the cards") {jp} - [9F03] "53% new footage" in I&S movie (cf. "23% new footage" in this episode) - [1F08] Howard Hughes is referenced {dh} - [8F09], [9F15] "The Land of Chocolate" music plays {dh} - [1F13] Homer refers to his trip to space in the clip from Mother Simpson {dh} - [2F20] The evidence that Dr. Monroe is dead {ddg} - [2F32] The death of Bleeding Gums Murphy {ddg} - [2F33] Written by Penny Wise {rl} =============================================================================== > Freeze frame fun =============================================================================== - Civic Center sign: {rl} SPRINGFIELD CIVIC AUDITORIUM TONIGHT GALA SPECTACULAR TOMORROW ALTERNATE LIFESTYLE SENIOR PROM - Warning in the opening scene: {rl} TWENTY-THREE PERCENT NEW FOOTAGE Not a significant source of U.S. RDA original entertainment - "Damnation" comic speech balloon: {rl} Depart from me, ye cursed! - Stuff in Groening's office: {rl} - Life in Hell poster - Simpsons poster - gin - The list of people involved with the Simpsons: {ddg} - Rows 74-97 are the same as rows 1-24 in each column - Row 33 Left says "Daviod S. Cohen" (instead of "David") and Row 35 Center says "Louis Cohen" (instead of "Louise") - There are 182 unique names 1 Younghee Higa Josh Weinstein Tim Heyen 2 Jen Kamerman Lance Thatcher Neil Alsip 3 Rick Roosevelt Kristen Y. Howard Jo Jo Stiger 4 Ethan Spalding Nia Andrews Dan Helmut 5 Allison Elliott Ely Lester Amy Kramer 6 Dominique Braud-Stieger Eric Stefani Candace Kuwahara 7 Josh Weinstein Younghee Higa Lucy Vollbrecht 8 Mark McJimsey Shigeko Doyle Neil Alsip 9 Ping Warner Robert Ingram Lance Thatcher 10 Dan Faris Antonia Coffman Richard Sakai 11 Don Gilbert Arden Rynew Tim Heyen 12 Beth Traeger Steve Mitchell Michael Ludy 13 Joe Johnson J. Michael Mendel Ethan Spalding 14 Rick Roosevelt Michelle Berman Amy Klees-Rychlich 15 Brad Greene Lisa M. Raffonelli John Berman 16 Neil Goldman Devin Paul Belle Norman 17 Nia Andrews Janet Shirley Patrick Buchanan 18 John McGreal Joe Boucher Phil Hartman 19 David Gilbert India Andrews Carlos Abdala 20 Greg Daniels Dan Helmut Bill Breshears 21 Vyolet Diaz David Mendel Colin A.B.V. Lewis 22 Jen Kamerman Mark Behn Bill Oakley 23 Joel Kuwahara Christopher Scott Seth Maury 24 Don Johnson Marty Gross Jonathan Elliott 25 Juel Bestrop Elizabeth McJimsey Colleen Murakami 26 Jo Jo Stiger Mike Whamond Terry Greene 27 Matt Groening Dan Castellaneta David Lipman 28 Luis Escobar Mike Marcantel Becca Ramos 29 Phyllis Craig Cookie Tricarico Kent Holaday 30 Ken Tsumura Kathy Duerr Josh Rynew 31 Velvet Pierson Christine Bourgeois Ricky Booker 32 Rochelle Thatcher Jacqueline Atkins Everett A. Oliver 33 Daviod S. Cohen Jane Yamashita George Meyer 34 Jonathan Collier Denise Sirkot Brent Forrester 35 Jennifer Crittenden Louis Jaffe Ken Keeler 36 Richard Appel Trish Helmut Dan Greaney 37 Harry Shearer Bill Schultz Yeardley Smith 38 Bobby Mackston Christine Griswold Chris Ledesma 39 Mike Scully Adam Kuhlman Bonita Pietila 40 Travis Powers Lance Wilder Julie Kavner 41 Kim Hayes Karen Bauer R. Russell Smith 42 Pamela Hayden Anne Luiting Al Jean 43 Annette Andersen Martin Alvarez Tress MacNeille 44 Aileen Braun Laurie Biernacki Karen M. Boyle 45 Elizabeth Jacobs Ariel Lauritzen Alf Clausen 46 Sam Simon Elizabeth Hernandez Penny Wise 47 Maria Kavanaugh Kurtis Kunsak Greg Orloff 48 David Silverman Steve Tompkins Mike Reiss 49 Brooke Kane James L. Brooks Felicia Nalivansky 50 Michael Wolf Ian Maxtone-Graham Ellen Barnett 51 Ralph A. Eusebio Nancy Cartwright David Mirkin 52 Celia Kendrick Hank Azaria Alexander Duke 53 Joe Wack Brad Bird Sherry Falk 54 Paul Fetler Kristen Y. Howard John Swartzwelder 55 Danny Elfman Dale Hendrickson Sharon Ramsay 56 Ronald Cox Shaun Cashman Sandra Contreras 57 Bob Hile Syd Kato Reid Kramer 58 Larry Field Robert Pennington Heidi Johnson 59 David Mathie Matthew Kee Adam Won 60 Andrew Dolvin Don Dixon C.J. Dolvin 61 Anatole Klebano Avery Cobern George Nicifords 62 Rob Cohen Tony Cappelli Mike Bridge 63 Jon Vitti Paula Cox Mike McCusker 64 Peter Kwong Ian Deitchman Conan O'Brien 65 Doris Grau Carrie Pike Bob Parks 66 Colin A.B.V. Lewis Ping Warner Beth Traeger 67 Robert Ingram Steve Mitchell Richard Sakai 68 Amy Kramer Dan Faris John McGreal 69 Devin Paul Arden Rynew Brad Greene 70 Joe Johnson Vyolet Diaz Joe Boucher 71 Shigeko Doyle Amy Kramer Brad Greene 72 Janet Shirley India Andrews Seth Murray 73 Christopher Scott Marty Gross Belle Norman 74 Younghee Higa Josh Weinstein Tim Heyen 75 Jen Kamerman Lance Thatcher Neil Alsip 76 Rick Roosevelt Kristen Y. Howard Jo Jo Stiger 77 Ethan Spalding Nia Andrews Dan Helmut 78 Allison Elliott Ely Lester Amy Kramer 79 Dominique Braud-Stieger Eric Stefani Candace Kuwahara 80 Josh Weinstein Younghee Higa Lucy Vollbrecht 81 Mark McJimsey Shigeko Doyle Neil Alsip 82 Ping Warner Robert Ingram Lance Thatcher 83 Dan Faris Antonia Coffman Richard Sakai 84 Don Gilbert Arden Rynew Tim Heyen 85 Beth Traeger Steve Mitchell Michael Ludy 86 Joe Johnson J. Michael Mendel Ethan Spalding 87 Rick Roosevelt Michelle Berman Amy Klees-Rychlich 88 Brad Greene Lisa M. Raffonelli John Berman 89 Neil Goldman Devin Paul Belle Norman 90 Nia Andrews Janet Shirley Patrick Buchanan 91 John McGreal Joe Boucher Phil Hartman 92 David Gilbert India Andrews Carlos Abdala 93 Greg Daniels Dan Helmut Bill Breshears 94 Vyolet Diaz David Mendel Colin A.B.V. Lewis 95 Jen Kamerman Mark Behn Bill Oakley 96 Joel Kuwahara Christopher Scott Seth Maury 97 Don Johnson Marty Gross Jonathan Elliott - Names that appear more than once: {ddg} FOUR TIMES (12) THREE TIMES (22) TWICE (29) Neil Alsip India Andrews Carlos Abdala Nia Andrews Joe Boucher Mark Behn Brad Greene Vyolet Diaz John Berman Dan Helmut Shigeko Doyle Michelle Berman Tim Heyen Dan Faris Dominique Braud-Stieger Younghee Higa Marty Gross Bill Breshears Jen Kamerman Kristen Y. Howard Patrick Buchanan Amy Kramer Robert Ingram Antonia Coffman Rick Roosevelt Joe Johnson Greg Daniels Ethan Spalding Colin A.B.V. Lewis Allison Elliott Lance Thatcher John McGreal Jonathan Elliott Josh Weinstein Steve Mitchell David Gilbert Belle Norman Don Gilbert Devin Paul Neil Goldman Beth Traeger Phil Hartman Arden Rynew Don Johnson Richard Sakai Amy Klees-Rychlich Christopher Scott Candace Kuwahara Janet Shirley Joel Kuwahara Jo Jo Stiger Ely Lester Beth Traeger Michael Ludy Ping Warner Seth Maury mARK mCjImsey David Mendel J. Michael Mendel Bill Oakley Lisa M. Raffonelli Eric Stefani Lucy Vollbrecht - Pizza box: {rl} Jackie McLean's Pizza and Jazz =============================================================================== > Animation, continuity, and other goofs =============================================================================== In the fake ending of WSMB II, Smithers is shown during the shooting looking as he normally does. But in the end of WSMB I and the beginning of WSMB II, he is unshaven, missing his jacket, and his tie is undone. {kp} =============================================================================== > Reviews =============================================================================== Mark Richey: The best of the clip shows. The outtakes were very funny. The "trivia" was a good send up of that sort, and the alternative solution to WSMB was pretty good. However, when you come right down to it, it was still just a clip show. C+ Dale Abersold: Hardly an episode at all...hardly even a clip show! The clips were terrific, even though the Robotic Richard Simmons was not nearly as scary as I had thought it should be. I also loved the O.J. reference about ignoring DNA evidence. However, if I must give the episode a grade, it would be: Incomplete. Haynes Lee: The producers have learned from last year that they cannot stitch together 20 minutes of old material with 5 minutes of new material. The result is a summary episode that should have been done a long time ago. Grade: A-. Andrew Wagster: This wasn't a terrible episode [despite it being a clips episode, which I usually hate], due mainly to Troy McClure, who I like. I got to see a few clips that I'd forgotten about [the Flintstones reference cracked me up in particular], so it wasn't a total waste. Grade: B. Benjamin Robinson: As the televised equivalent to a B-sides album, this episode makes a nice curio for the Simpsons fan. Almost makes up for my not getting to see Mr. Silverman's presentation in San Francisco. (B) John Martin: Please. Not another clip show! This one was better than the others, in that the writers made it pretty obvious that they (and Troy McClure) hate doing this sort of thing. The "Robotic Richards Simmons" clip is the ONLY thing that saves this from the garbage dump. Overall, a D-. Keith Palmer: I should admit that I don't hate clip shows just for being clip shows; I liked the first, but disliked the second. However, this episode's stripped-down frame, blasts from the distant past, outtakes, and unique look at Matt Groening made it more original and entertaining than its predecessors. Grade: B+/A- Dominik Halas: Brilliant! Much better than the first two clip shows because most of the clips they used _weren't_ ones we normally get to see. If Bart's blackboard lines are any indication, they'll do another one next year, so producers, take note: _this_ clip show is the one to emulate. Grade: A. Don Del Grande: C-plus - This is my idea of a "clip show"; however, there just weren't enough of the "outtakes" to make it really worthwhile, although anyone who never saw the shorts from "The Tracey Ullman Show" might like it a little better. On top of that, the promised "syndication outtakes" never appeared. Scott Fujimoto: This time, the producers made it interesting by including stuff that people wouldn't know about unless they watched Tracy Ullman or went to one of David Silverman's talks. Plus a lot of great (original) jokes. I liked it, although they can't pull the same stunt again. Grade: A. Frederic Briere: If I had to keep only one episode, it would be this one. Not that it was _that_ funny, but it truly kept the feeling of every season from the show: this is what the two first clip shows should've looked like. For someone who will never get Comedy Central in his life, those Tracey Ullman Shorts were a slice of paradise. (A) Ricardo Lafaurie: I'm wary of clip shows, but this one was great because it had the proper setting (they didn't try to intermingle it with the show.) Watching the Tracey Ullman shorts were good too. And Richdale must have been nuts to let them cut out that robotic Richard Simmons!!! B-. Jose Lafaurie: Probably the only good clip show ever. There was just one problem - did you notice the pacing was kind of slow. And to top that off, they had to put the Tracey Ullman show, which were, like the NeXT computer, built to be slow. And DYN how Troy spoke? There were gaps between every sentence, man. (C+) Adam Lipkin: Good lord, they didn't really look like that, did they? It's a much bgger change than I thought. As a clip show it went pretty well, considering that most of the clips were never shown before. Troy McClure takes a well-deserved starring role. Grade: B-. Tony Hill: This was superb, as clip shows go. It was well-paced, acerbic, and witty. The only detraction was the uniting of truth with parody (Captain Wacky, Groening's past, etc.). I give it an A-. Yours truly: Now that's how a clip show oughta be done. A terrific self-satirizing send-up of the show, with many classic scenes in a row plus a rare glimpse at what gets cut...what more could one want? As a clip show, A+; as a regular episode, B+. =============================================================================== > Comments and other observations =============================================================================== >> "Captain Wacky", a.k.a. Homer Ricardo Lafaurie writes, "When Troy said this, it sort of made me think about the Tracy Ullman show. Did you notice that Homer went nameless throughout the majority of the shows? He was even credited as `Dad' or `Mr. Simpson.' Some shorts give Homer's name. Examples follow: - "The Pagans" (MG22) by Bart {ddg} - "The Aquarium" (MG24) by Bart {ddg} - "Zoo Story" (MG29) by Marge {ddg} - "Art Museum" (MG29) by Marge - "Shut up Simpsons" (MG30) by Grampa and Bart - "Home Hypnotism" (MG32) by Marge and Bart {ddg} - "Punching Bag" (MG33) by Marge and Bart - "Echo Canyon" (MG36) by Bart - "The Bart Simpson Show" (MG38) by Lisa (!) - "Bathtime" (MG44) by Bart - "Family Therapy" (MG47) by Bart - "T.V. Simpsons" (MG48) by Bart Incidentally, Marge was never named until the half-hour show." >> The Indian movie This was, apparently, a not-inaccurate portrayal of Indian movies. The man who bursts through the window utters real Hindi curses. Sarang Gupta explains, "According to my Mom, who speaks fluent Hindi (but didn't see the show, so I had to pronounce this out loud to her), it means `Dog! (koothay) Mean person! (kaminay, a swear word in Hindi with no real English translation) I am speaking [these insults] to those who are eavesdropping/listening to me. (suun ka va jay)' Although it sounds awkward translated, my Mom tells me it's a viable insult in Hindi (plus I'm grounded for two weeks...)." Jay Srinivasan further notes, "The `top 400 list' remark by Apu is a reference to the fact that India is the leading producer of movies. They have thousands, if not more, every year. That's why they are so crappy. My mom told me that many movies have weddings where it rains, and then there is dancing, not unlike Apu's movie." >> Domino's Pizza Their guarantee was delivery in under "30 minutes or your pizza is free." Haynes Lee notes, "However, one of their drivers got into a really nasty accident and Domino's got sued big-time. A really good legal reference." >> Hardcore nudity from 2F07 Benjamin Robinson writes, "If you look carefully, you'll notice that another outtake slipped into the nudie montage at the end. The scene where Bart interrupts Homer and Marge's is from `Grampa vs. Sexual Inadequacy (2F07),' right? Wrong! I checked my tape of the original airing, and -- yowsa! -- we got to see a lot more of her this time. In fact, the scene that did air looks comparatively crude, as if the censors balked at the last minute and ordered a re- do. Well, I guess this makes up for dropping the `doggy leapfrog' scene from `Two Dozen & One Greyhounds (2F18).'" =============================================================================== > Quotes and Scene Summary =============================================================================== Troy: "The Simpsons" began as the brainchild of cartoonist Matt Groening, [screen shows a bald man with an eyepatch saluting in front of a US flag and looking menacing] the already-famous creator of such comics as "Damnation", "Johnny Reb", and "True Murder Stories". [screen shows each] In 1987, Groening teamed up with award-winning producers James L. Brooks [shot of 8F01-esque rich man surrounded by bags of money] and Sam Simon. [shot of Howard Hughes-esque naked man typing in bed] And what better place to premiere their creation than on "The Tracy Ullman Show", the nation's showcase for psychiatrist jokes and musical comedy numbers? On April 19th, 1987, America first met "The Simpsons". -- From humble beginnings, "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" % All 1:48 of MG01 ("Good Night") airs. When the camera returns to % Troy, he has a look of disbelieving incredulity on his face. He % laughs suddenly and observes, "They haven't changed a bit, have they?" % % He continues, "As the weeks went on, so did the cartoons." 0:46 of % MG16 ("The Perfect Crime") airs, followed by 0:47 of MG13 ("Space % Patrol"). Troy resumes, "As wacky as those kids were, they were no % match for `Captain Wacky', later renamed `Homer'." 0:24 of MG20 % ("World War III") airs, followed by 1:06 of MG44 ("Bathtime"). Troy: Maybe the drawings were a little crude, but all the characters were there: Itchy & Scratchy, [shot of Itchy showing Scratchy a female cat] Grampa Simpson, [shot of a very crude crayon drawing of Abe] and Krusty the Klown. [shot of another very crude drawing of Krusty] When we return, more classic moments, and, for the first time ever on TV, our private reel of "Simpsons" outtakes, including the alternate endings to "Who Shot Mr. Burns?" [the audience claps as Troy walks offstage] [once there, he sighs and lights a cigarette] -- "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" % Just before the commercial break, the announcer asks, "In the opening % credits, what does the cash register say when Maggie is scanned?" % % [End of Act One. Time: 8:33] Announcer: In the opening credits, what does the cash register say when Maggie is scanned? The cash register says, "NRA4EVER", just one of the hundreds of radical right-wing messages inserted into every show by creator Matt Groening. Troy: Over the six years "The Simpsons" has been on the air, we've received dozens of letters from fans wanting to know more about the show. Tonight, we'll answer some of your questions. Professor Lawrence Pierce of the University of Chicago writes, "I think Homer gets stupider every year." That's not a question, Professor, but we'll let the viewers judge for themselves. -- No jury in the world would convict him, "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" [screen: "Second season"] Homer: [disguising his voice] Hello, my name is Mr. Burns. I believe you have a letter for me. Employee: OK, Mr. Burns. Uh, what's your first name? Homer: [pause] I don't know. -- 0:11 from 7F22 ("Blood Feud"): is Home getting stupider?, "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" [screen: "Third season"] Marge: Well, Homer, maybe you can take some consolation in the fact that something you created is making so many people happy. Homer: [sarcastic] Ooh, look at me! I'm making people happy! I'm the magical man from Happyland, in a gumdrop house on Lollipop Lane! [walks out, slams door] [sticks head back in] Oh, by the way: I was being sarcastic [slams door] Marge: Well, _duh_. -- 0:22 from 8F08 ("Flaming Moe's"): is Homer getting stupider?, "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" [screen: "Fourth season"] [the theme from "The Flintstones" plays] [a man looks at his watch, and pulls a cord on a whistle] Homer: Yabba dabba doo! [slides down pipe, crashes through window into car] [singing] Simpson, Homer Simpson, He's the greatest guy in history! From the town of Springfield, He's about to hit a chestnut tree. Aah! [smash!] -- 0:29 from 9F10 ("Marge vs. the Monorail"): is Homer getting stupider?, "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" [screen: "Fifth season"] Homer: Hey, guys! Look what I smuggled aboard! [shows a bag of chips] Buzz: Homer, no! [he opens the bag; the chips fly everywhere] Race: They'll clog the instruments! Buzz: [shielding eyes] Careful! They're ruffled! Homer: I'll take care of this... [as the "Blue Danube" plays, Homer floats about, eating chips] [his head approaches the ant colony] Aah! Ants! Ant 1: Protect the queen! Ant 2: Which one's the queen? Ant 3: I'm the queen! Ant 1: No you're not! Homer: Nooo! [his head smashed the colony, and the ants float free] Ant 1: Freedom! Horrible, horrible freedom! -- 0:53 from 1F13 ("Deep Space Homer"): is Homer getting stupider?, "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" [screen: "Sixth season"] Homer: "No TV and No Beer Make Homer" something something. Marge: [timid] "Go Crazy"? Homer: Don't mind if I do! [makes lots of silly noises, then chases Marge] -- 0:18 from 2F03 ("Treehouse of Horror V"): is Homer getting stupider?, "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" Troy: Dr. Linus Irving of the Sloan-Ketterling Memorial Institute writes, "How does Matt Groening find the time to write and draw an entire `Simpsons' episode every week?" For the answer to this, we went straight to the source. [through a window, a shot of Matt at a desk] Matt: [seeing the camera] Get out of my off --! [picks up a gun, shoots at the camera] Troy: Of course, what Matt _meant_ to say, according to his attorneys, is that he couldn't possibly do it alone. And he insisted that we make time to acknowledge the hard work of everyone who makes "The Simpsons" possible. [very quick shot of lots of names] -- Hey, they took the time, "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" Troy: Ambassador Henry Mwabwetumba of the Ivory Coast writes, "What is the real deal with Mr. Burns' assistant Smithers? You know what I'm talking about." Ha ha ha, of course we do. [0:13 from 1F01 ("Rosebud")] Smithers: The preparations for your birthday have begun. Burns: I won't get what I really want. Smithers: No one does... [imagines Mr. Burns, naked, popping out of a cake singing, "Happy Birthday, Mr. Smithers] [0:14 from 8F17 ("Dog of Death")] Smithers: People _like_ dogs, Mr. Burns. Burns: Nonsense! Dogs are idiots. Think about it, Smithers: if _I_ came into your house and started sniffing at your crotch and slobbering all over your face, what would you say? Smithers: [pause] If _you_ did it, Sir? [0:13 from 1F12 ("Lisa vs. Malibu Stacy")] Smithers: Here, I'll print you out a copy. Lisa: Thanks! [Smithers turns on his computer; a bitmapped Mr. Burns appears] Burns: [halting cadence] Hello, Smithers. You're quite good at turning me on. Smithers: Um...you probably should ignore that. [0:19 from 9F05 ("Marge Gets a Job")] Burns: [sighs] I dreamed about her again last night, Smithers. You know that dream when you're in bed and they fly in through the window? [Smithers imagines Burns doing just that] Troy: [voiceover] As you can see, the real deal with Waylon Smithers is that he's Mr. Burns' assistant. He's in his early 40s, is unmarried, and currently resides in Springfield. Thanks for writing! We'll be right back. -- "Skirting" the issue, "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" % Just before the commercial break, the announcer asks, "Which popular % `Simpsons' characters have died in the past year?" % % [End of Act Two. Time: 13:22] Announcer: Which popular "Simpsons" characters have died in the past year? If you said Bleeding Gums Murphy and Dr. Marvin Monroe, you are wrong: they were never popular. Troy: Right about now, you're probably saying, "Troy, I've seen _every_ `Simpsons' episode. You can't show me anything new." [menacing] Well, you got some attitude, Mister. Besides, you're wrong! Because sometimes, episodes run long, and certain scenes never get aired. So fire up your VCR, because here, for the first time ever, are the cut-out classics. -- "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" Troy: [voiceover] When Krusty the clown got canceled, he tried everything to stay on the air. Here's what you didn't see. Krusty: Watch my show, I will send you this book featuring me in a variety of sexually explicit positions. [men drag him off] What? Hey! It's not really me: I used a stunt butt! [later, Krusty looks dejected as three men walk up] Man 1: Krusty, we're from the network. Uh, we have some bad news: I'm afraid your show's been canceled. Krusty: Oh, I thought this would happen. I just hope you replace me with something as educational and uplifting as I tried to be. Man 2: Actually, it's a hemorrhoid infomercial starring Claude Akins. Krusty: Can I play hemorrhoid sufferer number one? Ooh! Oh, that hurts! Ow! Oh, is there no relief? Man 1: I don't think so. [they start to walk off] Krusty: How about one of the "after" guys? Aah. Ohh, that's better. I can ride a bike again! Man 1: Sorry. -- Some new footage in 9F19 ("Krusty Gets Kancelled"), "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" Troy: [voiceover] When Springfield legalized gambling, Homer became a blackjack dealer -- and comedy was in the cards. Blofeld: 20. Your move, Mr. Bond. Bond: I'll take a hit, dealer. [Homer gives him a card] Joker! You were supposed to take those out of the deck. Homer: Oh, sorry. Here's another one. Bond: What's this card? "Rules for Draw and Stud Poker"? Blofeld: What a pity, Mr. Bond. [Odd Job and Jaws grab Bond and drag him out] Bond: But...but it's Homer's fault! I didn't lose. I never lose! Well, at least tell me the details of your plot for world domination. Blofeld: Ho ho ho, I'm not going to fall for _that_ one again. -- Some new footage in 1F08 ("$pringfield"), "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" Troy: [voiceover] Earlier this year, Homer's long-lost mother returned. And so did a long-lost care package. [shot of Homer eating food from old care packages] Homer: Mmm. Mother: Homer, please: you don't have to wolf down that 25- year-old candy just to make me happy. Homer: [pause] But it won't make you unhappy, right? [bites] Hey! Space food sticks! Oh, I wish I had _these_ on my space adventure. Did you know I was blasted into space two years ago, Mom? Mother: Well, sure. I read all about it. It _was_ national news. [fearfully] Do you _still_ work for NASA? Homer: No, I work at the nuclear power plant. Mother: Oh, Homer. Homer: Well, you'll be happy to know I don't work very hard. [quietly] Actually, I'm bringing the plant down from the inside [taps nose secretively] -- Some new footage in 3F06 ("Mother Simpson"), "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" Troy: [voiceover] When Homer sold his soul for a donut, he found Hell isn't all it's cracked up to be in these never-before broadcast scenes. [a demon selects Homer's head from several and grips it] [he rolls it down an alley as Homer's head screams] [it hits the spiked pins and breaks open, revealing a note: "IOU one brain, signed God"] [at home, Marge reads the phone book] Marge: Lawyers, lawyers, lawyers...oh! Lionel Hutz. "Cases won in 30 minutes or your pizza's free." Hmm. Bart: I'd sell my soul for a formula one racing car. [Satan Ned appears with a race car] Ned: Heh heh heh, that can be arranged. Bart: Changed my mind. Sorry. [Ned vanishes] Cool! Marge: Bart! Stop pestering Satan. [after the trial] Lizzie: Your Honor, we find that Homer Simpson's soul is legally the property of Marge Simpson and not of the devil. Ned: [disappointed] Oh. Kids: Yay! [the legions of Hell disappear] Hutz: [walking around a corner] Well, I didn't win. Here's your pizza. Marge: But we _did_ win! Hutz: That's OK: the box is empty. -- Some new footage in 1F04 ("Treehouse of Horror IV"), "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" % Troy has fallen asleep on the couch behind the film projector. % Someone pokes him with a stick. "If that's what they cut out, what % they leave in must be pure gold!" he says, awakening with a start. % "Let's watch some more of those fabulous Simpsons outtakes." Troy: Apu living with the Simpsons?! It happened. And here's a scene you didn't see. Apu: I'm hoping you enjoy this movie. It made every Indian critic's top 400 list. Woman: [singing] Love love love love love! I'm in love with lovely Johnny. [an Indian man breaks through a window and curses in Hindi at three sitting men] [they all start dancing] Bart: This movie you rented sucks. Homer: No it doesn't, it's funny! Their clothes are different from my clothes. [laughs] Look at what they're wearing! [laughs more] -- Some new footage in 1F10 ("Homer and Apu"), "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" Troy: [voiceover] A few years back, Bart was adopted by Mr. Burns. In this very special outtake, Homer attempts a reconciliation with his estranged son. Watch. Homer: Bart, you're coming home. Bart: I want to stay here with Mr. Burns. Burns: I suggest you leave immediately. Homer: Or what? You'll release the dogs, or the bees, or the dogs with bees in their mouths, and when they bark, they shoot bees at you? Well, go ahead. Do your worst. Burns: "Do my worst", eh? Smithers, release the robotic Richard Simmons. [a door open and said robot walks out] Simmons: Come on, big boy! Shake that butter off those buns. [a speaker pops out of its head and plays "Shake Your Booty"] Homer: Aah! [runs away] Simmons: Come on, come on, girls! Shake, shake, shake! Burns: Smithers, it's out of control. Smithers: I'll take him out, Sir! [cocks shotgun, blasts it in the head] [the hole closes up a la T2 and the dancing resumes] Simmons: [slowing down] Shake, shake, shake! Shake, shake, shake! Shake, shake, shake... Smithers: His ass is going to blow! [they all run in the house] [the robot explodes, its head landing far away] -- Some new footage from 1F16 ("Burns' Heir"), "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" % The camera returns to Troy. Troy: This past summer, all of America was trying to solve the mystery of who shot Mr. Burns. [pause] Then they found out it was the baby. [long pause; coughs] To keep this bombshell secret, the producers animated several solutions that were never intended to air. [scene shows Barney, Tito Puente, Moe, Apu, and SLH each shooting Mr. Burns next to the Simpson car] And to keep the show's animators, editors, staff, and hangers-on from leaking the solution, two completely different endings were produced: one real, one phony. Here's the ending you were never meant to see. -- The rumors laid to rest, "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" Burns: The one who shot me was...[camera pans to Smithers] Aah! Aah! Waylon Smithers! Smithers: [pained] Noo! Wait a minute: yes. Burns: With the sun blocker in place and the town aghast, I was on top of the world. So I wanted to kick up my heels and indulge my sweet tooth. [walks toward parking lot] I feel like celebrating. [sees Maggie] Oh, it's you. What are you so happy about? [she smiles, holding up a lollipop] [gasps] I see. [voiceover] Smithers had thwarted my earlier attempt to take candy from a baby. But with him out of the picture, I was free to wallow in my own crapulence. Or so I thought -- but at the last moment, Smithers, drunk as a lemur, lurched out of the darkness and fired. Smithers: [remembering] That's right. Right before I shot Jasper. Hmm, I was busy that night. Burns: [voiceover] Stricken, I lurched forth in search of aid, but finding only slack-jawed gawkers, I gave up and collapsed on the sundial. Lisa: Then, with your last ounce of strength, you pointed to W and S: "Waylon Smithers". Marge: Well, I'm just relieved that Homer's safe and that you've recovered and that we can all get back to normal. Burns: Not exactly. Smithers, for attempting to kill me, I'm giving you a 5% pay cut. Smithers: [howling] Ohh. Troy: But of course, for that ending to work, you would have to ignore all the Simpson DNA evidence. [laughs] And that would be downright nutty. -- The alternate ending to 2F20 ("Who Shot Mr. Burns? Part Two"), "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" % The camera shows two photos of the Simpson family, one from an early % Tracy Ullman short, the other from a modern episode. Troy: Yes, the Simpsons have come a long way since an old drunk made humans out of his rabbit characters to pay off his gambling debts. Who knows what adventures they'll have between now and the time the show becomes unprofitable? I'm Troy McClure, and I'll leave you with what we all came here to see: hardcore nudity! -- The credits roll, "The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular" % [End of Act Three. Time: 21:45] % % Over the credits, "Shake Your Booty" plays, while we are treated to % many samples of nudity from the show, including: {ddg} % % 9F07 Barney's "diaper" comes off % 1F22 Nelson removes Martin's swim trunks % 1F01 Homer's impression of Mr. Burns % 2F32 Bart as "Dr. Cheeks" % 2F04 Willie's kilt is lifted % 2F12 Homer's clown pants get caught in his mini-bicycle % 2F13 "Don't tread on me" % 2F06 Homer's robe lifted by the wind % 9F08 baby Bart swings on a clothesline % 7F18 Marge enters bathroom, sees nude Burns % 2F07 Bart interrupts nude Homer/Marge % 2F06 Homer getting out of the shower and seeing a helicopter % 2F10 photo of Bart "riding" Snowball % 9F04 naked Homer running from Krusty doll {cc} % 1F18 Bart on the toilet % 2F09 Homer dragging a stone chained to him {rl} % 8F05 Rabbis in the sauna % 9F13 Bart doing a Nixon impression % 7G09 naked Homer in the forest % 8F19 Homer throws his hat over the "camera" {rl} =============================================================================== > Contributors =============================================================================== {cc} Chris Courtois {ddg} Don Del Grande {dh} Dominik Halas {rl} Ricardo Lafaurie {kp} Keith Palmer {jp} John Plasket =============================================================================== This episode summary is Copyright 1997 by James A. Cherry. Not to be redistributed in a public forum without permission. (The quotes themselves, of course, remain the property of The Simpsons, and the reproduced articles remain the property of the original authors. I'm just taking credit for the compilation.)