[MG40] Simpsons Xmas

Simpson Xmas                                           Written by Matt Groening
[$Id: mg40 1.1 92/01/23 07:45:49 raymond Exp Locker: raymond $]
> Didja notice...
    ... Maggie fell once?  When Bart poked at his present.
    ... the snowman in the yard has Homer's head?  Complete with beard
        and two hairs!

> Freeze Frame Fun
>> Lisa and Maggie's room
   On the wall next to the door, a picture of Grampa.
   On the shelf above the beds, assorted dolls, books, and boxes.
   Above the shelf, a picture of Jeff (or is it Akbar?).

>> The hallway
   A mouse hole.
   A picture of Marge with a very disapproving expression.
   (Watching Bart sneak down the hallway, no doubt.)

>> The staircase
   On the wall are pictures of...
        Marge (smiling broadly)
        Bart and Homer
        Lisa and Maggie, looking towards the bottom of the staircase
            (Watching Bart slide down the banister, no doubt.)

>> The room with the Christmas tree
   Fireplace, above which is a very large family portrait.
   Three stockings hung by the chimney with care.
    (When Bart fires his gun, there is only one.  A second stocking
     can be seen on the floor.  The third is nowhere to be found,
     a casualty of the present-opening spree.)
   A couch, across from which sits a TV set.

>> On Bart's nightstand
   three coins.
   a Krusty picture.
   a clock which reads 2am.

> Animation goofs
Homer's menacing shadow is bareheaded, but when we cut to the real Homer,
he's wearing a blue stocking cap.  Also, his hand is nowhere near a light
switch when we cut to him.  (The nearest light switch is behind and to
his right.  And it's six feet off the floor!!)

> Quotes and scene summary
% B = Bart, H = Homer
% Scene:  Exterior of the Simpsons house.  Snow is falling.

B: [VO] 'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the home,

% Fade to inside.  Aside from the window in the center of the screen,
% the picture is black.  A pair of eyes enters from stage right.  As
% it passes in front of the window, we see that it is Bart.

B: Not a creature was stirring,

% Bart continues moving, his eyes exiting stage left.

B:                              'cept for me and this poem.

% Bart opens the door to Lisa and Maggie's room.  Lisa is asleep with
% a smile on her face.  Maggie, in a small bed (not crib) next to Lisa's,
% is also asleep, though she sucks furiously on her pacifier.

B: My sisters were nestled all snug in their beds,
   While visions of candy bars danced in their heads.

% With a twinkle, a thought balloon appears above the girls, depicting
% two candy bars and a Rollo with arms and legs, dancing to funky music.

B: Then I sprang like a spring,

% Bart hops out the doorway.  The girls each open one eye and watch him go.

B:                              and snuck like a sneak,

% Bart quietly hops down the hallway.

B: Down the stairs to the gifts,

% Bart slides down the banister.

B:                               for just a quick peek.

% Bart slides downward out of frame, and lands with a thud.
% Bart picks himself up and looks off camera with a troubled expression.

B: When, lo and behold, what did I see?

% Cut to Bart's viewpoint.  Lisa (wearing a blue nightgown) and Maggie
% (in a white baggie) standing by the tree.

B: Lisa and Maggie had just beaten me!

% Lisa is admiring a small present.  Maggie shakes a small wrapped box.
% (Whap whap whap.)  Bart crawls to a rather large red box, which he
% pokes at with his left index finger.  (Thump thump.)

B: I poked at my package, and said, [aloud] This is rad, man!

% On the couch and wall behind Bart grows a menacing shadow,
% with hunched shoulders, and fingers curled.

B: [VO] Then noticed Dad's shadow.  He looked like a madman!

% The shadow reaches to the side and turns on the light.  Cut to Homer,
% in his blue nightgown, blue stocking cap, and blue socks.

H: Oh Maggie, oh Lisa, oh little Bartholomew!

% Homer points to each child as he says the name.

H: Go upstairs, go right now, before I kill all of you!

% Homer punctuates his brief speech with strangling gestures.
% The kids scurry off.

B: And so into bed we fled in a flash,

% Trailing a cloud of dust, Bart hops into bed.  The lights are put out
% (presumably by Homer, off-screen), and the screen goes black, save for
% Bart's eyes.

B: Awaiting 'til morning to open our stash.

% Bart blinks twice before going to sleep.
% Through the window, the sun peeks over the horizon.

B: At last daybreak came, and we scampered so cheerily,

% Lisa, Maggie, and Bart rush past the window, arms extended in front
% of them, with expressions of great anticipation.

B: While Mom and Dad yawned, and gazed at us wearily.

% Homer and Marge on the couch.  Homer still in his nightgown, his
% two hairs uncombed.  Marge in a grey nightgown next to him with a
% cup of coffee, her hair still up in rollers.  Both have bags under
% their eyes.  As Homer yawns, we hear the kids tearing into their
% presents, as ribbons, empty boxes, and torn wrapping paper fly past.

B: For Maggie, a pacifier.

% Maggie holds a shiny new pacifier (twinkle!) in her hand.  She removes
% her existing pacifier (pop!) and smiles.  (No teeth.)

B:                          For Lisa, some dolls.

% Lisa, smiling, holds a Binky doll in her right hand, and a Bongo doll
% in her left.  The dolls have no pupils.

B: For me a big burp gun

% Bart smiles broadly as he holds a large green toy gun.

B:                       which shoots ping-pong balls.

% He aims and pulls the barrel repeatedly.  With each pull comes a
% popping sound, and a red ping-pong ball emerges from the barrel of
% the gun, bouncing off Homer's head.  Homer puts his hands in front
% of his face, but that doesn't help.

B: Then on came the TV,

% The family are camped out on the couch, Maggie in Homer's lap.
% Homer hits the remote, and ``Jingle Bells'' meekly plays on the
% TV set as we see Itchy and Scratchy in a snow scene, wearing
% Christmas caps (no scarves) and waving politely at the camera.

B:                       and we started to doze
   Through all the exciting Christmas theme shows.

% Everyone gradually nods off.  First Homer, then Marge, then Lisa,
% then Maggie.  Bart is the only one remaining awake.
% Shot from beside the TV.  Bart in the foreground, continuing his
% poem.  The rest of the family asleep on the couch, Lisa curled up at
% one end, her Bongo doll on the floor in front of her.  Maggie is asleep
% in Homer's lap.

B: [aloud] So, to those of you groovin' on my holiday rap,
   Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good nap.

% Bart waves good-bye to all, still holding his toy gun in his right hand.
% [Time: 1:08]
Shorts summaries Copyright 1992 by Raymond Chen.  Not to be redistributed
in a public forum without permission.  (The quotes themselves, of course,
remain the property of The Tracey Ullman Show, and the reproduced articles
remain the property of the original authors.  I'm just taking credit for the

Conversion by Howard Jones (ha.jones@ic.ac.uk)