[MG06] Burp Contest

Burp Contest                                           Written by Matt Groening
===============================================================================
[$Id: mg06 1.1 92/02/25 20:20:42 raymond Exp Locker: raymond $]
===============================================================================
> Didja notice...
===============================================================================
    ... the obligatory mouse hole in the corner?
    ... Marge and Homer were uncredited?

===============================================================================
> Freeze Frame Fun
===============================================================================
Obviously, you freeze-frame the burps.

===============================================================================
> Assorted comments and observations
===============================================================================
The stage left door has a rounded top (like in the half-hour show) but the
stage-right door has a flat top.

Brian Howard {bh} gives the timing for this short as 1:54, whereas the
syndication package contains only 1:32 of animation.

===============================================================================
> Quotes and scene summary
===============================================================================
% B = Bart, L = Lisa, M = Marge, H = Homer
%
% Bart, Lisa, and Maggie are in a room.  Maggie sits in the corner, sucking
% away on her pacifier.  Bart at stage left, Lisa at stage right, each
% with a can of soda in their hand.
%
% Close-up on Bart as he takes a swig and burps.
%
% Close-up on Lisa as she takes two sips of her soda and also burps.
%
% Marge bursts in the stage left door.

M: What are you kids doing now!
B: We're having a ... [burp] contest, Mom.

% Lisa nods in agreement.

M: What?
L: We're having a burp contest, Mom.

% Lisa holds up her can of POW Cola to illustrate.
%
% Marge scolds the kids by shaking her index finger.

M: Well, knock it off.  I do not allow burping in this house.

% Marge storms out.

B: I love Mom...
L: But ...

% Bart takes a gulp of soda and burps.  Lisa does the same.

B: The show must go on.

% [End of Act One.  Time: 0:31]
%
% Lisa burps just as Bart takes huge swig of cola.  Marge bursts
% in the door, leaving Bart stuck with the soda in his mouth.  Although
% Bart's mouth is shut, we can still make a pretty good guess at what
% he's saying.

M: Bart!
B: [his mouth shut] What?
M: What did I say about burping?
B: [shrugs, his mouth shut]  I dunno.

% During the lecture, Bart's cheeks puff up, and tiny bubbles emerge
% from his ears.

M: I said, no burping.  And when I say no burping, what do I mean?
B: [his mouth shut]  No burping.
M: That's right.  No burping.  I know you won't disappoint me.

% Marge finally leaves, and Bart lets loose a huge burp that knocks
% him on his back.  Lisa and Maggie applaud.
%
% [End of Act Two.  Time: 0:50]

B: Watch this.  The burp champion of the world.

% Bart takes a huge sip and emits a belch.  Marge bursts in.

M: Burp, I mean, Bart, are you burping again?
B: Maybe.
M: What is it with this burping?  Why?  What's the thrill?
L: It's fun.
M: It's crude.  It's vulgar.  It's, it's impolite.  And, and it's nauseating.

% Marge leaves.

L: That's what I said.  It's fun.
B: I'm still the burp champion of the world.

% Maggie removes her pacifier and produces a high-power belch.

L: Bart, meet the new champ.

% [End of Act Three.  Time: 1:03]

B: Watch this!

% Bart takes a sip and burps twice.  Lisa takes a sip.

L: Oh yeah?

% She burps thrice.  Once again, Marge burps, I mean, bursts in.

M: How many times do I have to tell you kids?
   I absolutely forbid burping in this household.

% Homer comes in the stage right door, in his hand a can of what we presume
% to be some of that wonderful Duff.

H: How's it goin', everybody?

% Homer gives a monster belch.

H: Oops.  Pardon my French, heh heh heh.
L: Thanks, Dad.
B: Good one, Dad.

% Marge can only watch, disappointed.  Maggie burps.
%
% (Cut in syndication:  After Maggie burps, Marge looks at all of them,
% stunned.)
%
% [End of Act Four.  Time: 1:32]
===============================================================================
Shorts summaries Copyright 1992 by Raymond Chen.  Not to be redistributed
in a public forum without permission.  (The quotes themselves, of course,
remain the property of The Tracey Ullman Show, and the reproduced articles
remain the property of the original authors.  I'm just taking credit for the
compilation.)