Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner? Written by Al Jean Directed by Nancy Kruse ============================================================================== Production code: AABF21 Original Airdate on FOX: 24-Oct-1999 Capsule revision B (24-Apr-2000) ============================================================================== > "TV Guide" Synopsis ============================================================================== (from Click TV) Homer affects the way trendy people eat when he becomes a local food critic, until he starts giving restaurants bad reviews. {ar} ============================================================================== > Title sequence ============================================================================== Blackboard: I AM NOT THE LAST DON Couch: The family runs into the living room for another fine evening of television. Marge notices that someone has written "Matt Groening" on the rug, and uses a cloth to rub out the signature. Matt Groening, decked out in one of his trademark Hawaiian shirts, runs in and re-autographs the scene. ============================================================================== > Did You Notice... ============================================================================== ... the "Springfield Shopper" cost only five cents when Homer was born? ... Homer stopped to get a zoo balloon? ... the Mary Worth phone in the cartoonist's office? ... we can see Homer's "dinkie" in the photo? [{rg} notes, "by my recollection this is only the second time one of THOSE has appeared on 'The Simpsons'." The first would be David's statue in "Itchy & Scratchy & Marge (7F09)" -- Ed.] Nathan DeHoff: ... Skinner eats dinner with Uter's real parents, rather than his exchange family? ... the "Zoo" balloon that someone (Milhouse?) brings to the newspaper? Don Del Grande: ... in the couch scene, "Matt" writes the name with his right hand? (It's not "mirror image" as the signature would be backwards as well) ... Lisa and Nelson are partners? (Unless Lisa's partner is either Milhouse or Bart ...) ... despite Marge being allergic to seafood, she's with Homer when he reviews the Frying Dutchman? Yuri Dieujuste: ... the tyre marks under the car in front of the Springfield Shopper offices? ... that the party for Mimi was held around 1:35 PM Jordan Eisenberg: ... the Hibberts, Rev. Lovejoy, Skinner, Krabappel and Kirk are in PS? ... Jamey Killday sounds just like Frank Grimes? Bruce Gomes: ... when Skinner is sitting at the table with Uter's parents, there are Beer steins on the table Joe Green: ... Milhouse doesn't wear a seat belt? ... Planet Hype had apparently changed its name to Planet Springfield? ... the "Ernest Goes Straight to Video" poster? Richard Green: ... Lisa now has a computer ... and it appears from the keyboard and "Chicago" font to be a Mac? ... Stampy appears? ... a cockroach crawls out of the lobster plate? ... Allison Taylor, back again! Look for everyone's favourite 7 year old when the words "hot sex weekly" (this is coincidental I assume) and "I smell cake" are spoken. ... the censors were bleeping words that not only are not very offensive, but have been muttered on the show before -- [from the CC] dingus, screw, stupid, damn ... in Lisa's room, there was a Bleeding Gums Murphy photo? ... at the Planet Hype, Reverend Lovejoy was sitting at a table with & Mrs. Hibbert ... but where is our hero Helen? Tony Hill: ... Matt Groening writes upside down? ... the editor has hairy arms? ... the Springfield Shopper is a tabloid? Darrel Jones: ... Lisa drools for the first time ever? Joe Klemm: ... Homer is bleeped five times in the episodes? ... the Star Wars and Sound of Music posters at Planet Springfield? ... UGLI, Krusty Burger, and Much Ado About Muffins have booths at A Taste of Springfield. Ondre Lombard: ... Homer is the only other adult in the tour group besides Ms. Hoover? ... Lisa doesn't use a word like "mouth-watering" as a direct English variant of "aaaughllll ..."? Patrick McGovern: ... this is the first time it's noted that Homer is working a part-time job? ... Planet Springfield would be competing with Planet Hype [assuming it wasn't just renamed -- Ed.], and Wolfcastle owns both? Chris Palm: ... Hans Moleman's pink Cadillac is still smashed through the wall of Planet Hype/Springfield, and you can see the front end inside the restaurant? ... there's no protective glass around the "Cable Guy" script, almost as if someone WANTED it to be torn up? (:-P) ... the C-3PO dummy in a glass case, with TIE Fighter and X-Wing models above it? ... the "Ah Fudge!" stand at the "Taste of Springfield" festival? ... there appears to be a Krusty Burger stand next to Much Ado About Muffins? ... Homer's eating a churro when his belly button changes? John Plaskett: ... the tour guide shows a sexually explicit newspaper to minors? ... the food critic speaks the way she writes? ... Homer uses a double negative in front of the editor? ... the Shopper staff seems to take "Stop the presses" literally? ... the appearance of the bug nearly coincides with Capt. McAllister saying "moving?" ... the Frying Dutchman's closed sign seems to capitalize on Captain McAllister's catchphrase? ... the French pastry chef _stirs_ the pastry dough with a _beater?_ ... Hans Moleman has a gruel stand and, therefore, restaurant? ... the Shopper's other critics are among those that give Homer his comeuppance? Tom Rinschler: ... Janey standing behind Lisa when she is talking to Homer? ... there are two crabs in the tank behind OFF at the "Frying Dutchman"? Benjamin Robinson: ... we could hear the words "tape over" on the tape before the player exploded? ... either Homer managed to get to the Shopper on time despite the zoo detour, or the tour group waited for him to arrive? ... Homer had the same stain on his shirt for a solid week? ... Herbie the Love Bug hangs from the ceiling of Planet Springfield? [See "Comments" section for more -- Ed.] ... the "Star Wars" and "Sound of Music" posters behind Rainier Wolfcastle? ... a Martian from "Mars Attacks!" on display at Planet Springfield? ... Burns, still fat, is in the crowd chasing Homer and Lisa? Gary Wilson: ... Lisa doesn't know how to use word count on her computer? She counts the words by hand. [Daniel Dreibelbis responds, "I'd like to think that Lisa probably bought a used vintage PC or Mac from the local Goodwill with her allowance; that could explain why she's using a program with no word count." -- Ed.] ... the Simpsons now have a computer, but Homer doesn't know how to use it? ============================================================================== > Voice Credits ============================================================================== - Starring - Dan Castellaneta (Willie, Homer, Actor, Krusty, Izzy) - Julie Kavner (Marge) - Nancy Cartwright (Bart, Nelson) - Yeardley Smith (Lisa) - Hank Azaria (Jamie Killday, Chief Wiggum, Luigi, Akira, Lou) - Harry Shearer (Principal Skinner, Burns, Gil, Ned Flanders, Uter's Dad, McAllister, Ranier Wolfcastle, Lenny, Garth Tralawney, Tuxedo Man, Chef) - Special Guest Voice - Ed Asner (Editor) - Marcia Wallace (Edna Krabappel [cut?]) - Also Starring - Pamela Hayden (Milhouse) - Tress MacNeille (Tour Guide, Ann Landers, Mimi, Daphne Beaumont) - Maggie Roswell (Shopper Telemarketer 2, Maude Flanders, Uter's Mom [?]) - Karl Wiedergott (Shopper Telemarketer 1) ============================================================================== > Movie (and other) references ============================================================================== + "Guess Who's Coming To Dinner?" (movie) - similar title + "Mario Puzo's The Last Don" (book) {hl} - Bart's blackboard punishment refers to this book by the author of "The Godfather" + The Kansas Board of Education - recently struck evolution from the cirriculum [See "Comments" section for more -- Ed.] - "She Works Hard for the Money" (song) {tr} - Homer sings this, sort of, on the tape for his decoy ~ "South Park" (TV series) {eb} - Homer's bleeped-out invectives might have been a take on the bleeps of South Park. It was gratuitous and pointless ... and in that respect perhaps it was a commentary through satire + Johnny Appleseed - Johnny Newspaperseed + "Mary Worth" (comic strip) {bcs} - the author of this strip is in the Springfield Shopper + Ann Landers & "Dear Abby" (newspaper columns) {bcs} - both are in the Shopper, and both write advice columns in the paper + "The Mary Tyler Moore Show" + "Lou Grant" (TV series) - Ed Asner's most famous role [about a TV news chief turned newspaper editor -- Ed.] - the role originated on "The Mary Tyler Moore" show, and Asner reprised it for "Lou Grant" {gw} - [Todd Emerson adds, "He also voiced Daily Bugle chief editor J. Jonah Jameson on Fox's last 'Spider-Man' cartoon!" -- Ed.] + Baskin Robbins (ice cream chain) {bcs} - the former food critic refers to "31 flavors." + Numero Uno Pizzerias {ddg} - "the pizza is not numero uno" + Pizzeria Uno {cp} - another similarly-named pizzeria chain + "I'm so pretty" (song from "West Side Story") - Homer sings to this tune at the going-away party + "The Treasure of the Sierra Madre" (movie) {jg} - "We don't need no stinkin' E!" (cf. badges) - "Gadsby" by Ernest Vincent Wright (book) {hl} - novel written entirely without using the letter e [See "Comments" section for more -- Ed.] - "Misery" (book) {ak} - the novel features a writer who, throughout the book, uses a typewriter without the letter "e" to write a book - "The Shining" (movie) {jg} - Homer typing the same phrase over and over again + Patti LaBelle (singer) - Pate LaBelle, restaurant + "God is great, God is good" (phrase) {bg} - "Cod is great, scrod is good" possibly a reference + Planet Hollywood {hl} - family visits Planet Springfield restaurant + "It's Pat" {tr} - this "Saturday Night Live" sketch, made into a movie which was never released and went straight to video, is mentioned on a poster. + "Heartbeeps" + "Citizen Kane" + "The Cable Guy" (movies) {tr} - alleged paraphernalia from these movies are seen. + Platypus Man (TV show) {djm} - failed UPN sitcom starring comedian Richard Jeni + "The Cosby Mysteries" (TV series) {tr} - Homer thinks the "Springfield Shopper" TV critic was the cause of this show being cancelled + "Petticoat Junction" (TV series) {gw} - show about a women and her three daughters running hotel in a small, rural town (called Hooterville, believe it or not) + "King Lear" (play) {tr} - Krusty attempts to liven up Shakespeare's play + "Romeo and Juliet" (play) {tr} - Krusty refers to Shakespeare's play in a joke + "soup to nuts" (phrase) {bjr} - it means "all-inclusive"; Homer (or Lisa) swaps it around to be "Nuts to Soup," meaning, "I didn't like the soup" + Tyson-Holyfield boxing match {hl} - ear literally bitten off - "Who Is Killing the Great Chefs of Europe?" (movie) {hl} - movie about murder, food, chefs, and food critics + "Godfather" (movie and book by Mario Puzo [told you!]) - the infamous horse's head mentioned + "Alka Seltzer" (indigestion remedy) {gw} - chef saying "that's a spicy meat ball" refers to a 1960's commercial for this product + "Moby Dick" (book) {tr} - Captain McAllister has a whale in his nightmares + the Dallas Book Depository (historical site) {bjr} - "Texas Cheesecake Depository" name is similar + "The French Connection" (movie) {jk} - The French Confection booth - "The Man with the Golden Gun" (movie) {jg} - shot of French chef assembling the eggbeater (cf. gun) is similar + "The Magnificent Ambersons" (movie) {sp} - references to George Amberson "getting his comeuppance"; compare this to Homer's vow that he will never get his ============================================================================== > Previous episode references ============================================================================== - Episodes that open with field trips {ms} - [7G03] SNPP - [1F11] Box factory - [2F19] Civil War field - [4F21] Springfield Police Department {bjr} - [AABF08] Springfield Post Office - [7F11] Akira running the Happy Sumo {ms} - [7F11], [4F18] Akira the restaurant owner seen {bjr} - [7F15] Somebody eats at the revolving restaurant {mr} - [8F03] Ah, Fudge! seen {al} - [8F05] Izzy's Deli seen - [8F05] The owner of Izzy's Deli appears {jg} - [8F06] Phineas Q. Butterfat is also there {bcs} - [8F07] a horse's head appears in a Simpson's bed {rg} - [8F09] The Hungry Hun appeared in "Burns Verkaufen der Kraftwerk" {th} - [8F16] The Gilded Truffle {mr} - [9F06] Captain McAllister running the Frying Dutchman {ms} - [9F16] Lisa writing an Itchy & Scratchy script under another Simpson name {ms} - [9F19] Johnny Carson appeared in "Krusty Gets Kancelled" {th} - [9F21] Someone fashions a dummy of Homer with a tape recorder, and it goes awry {bjr} - [1F06] Homer's sense of smell leads him to food {je} - [1F09] Homer: "We'll be right back." {je} - [1F10], [AABF01] Bleepings on the show {ms} - [1F16] Lenny fired because he couldn't tell Burns why he shouldn't fire him without using the letter e {hl} - [1F22], [3F02] Mary Worth is mentioned {dj} - [2F03] Principal Skinner attempts to cover up Uter's mysterious disappearance {tr} - [2F03] Uter disappears {jg} - [2F13], [5F20] Someone wants to kill Homer {dj} - [2F19] Uter's fate unknown after a field trip - [2F19] "The telephone game" is played {ol} - [2F31] movie critic featured {hl} - [3F01] "Turn tape over!" {je} - [3F02] Texas Cheesecake Depository mentioned - [3F04] "We'll be right back" {ms} - [3F05] Ah, Fudge seen, although not as a restaurant {bjr} - [3F05] Phineas Q. Butterfat's seen {bjr} - [3F15], [4F14] The Pimento Grove seen {bjr} - [3F15] UGLI restaurant seen - [3F21] Homer carpools Bart, Lisa, Nelson, and Milhouse {al} - [3F24] A food festival on the same location {rg} - [3G01] Mr. Burns is fooled by Homer's lousy attempt to get out of work {al} - [4F13] Much Ado About Muffins seen {bjr} - [4F18] Last talking role for Akira {dj} - [5F02] Bats fly into Homer's hair(s) {hl} - [5F14] "At'sa spicy meatball!" {je} - [5F21] Homer says, "People will think what I tell them to think!" (Cf. "Women will like what I tell them to like! {bcs} - [AABF01] Homer is bleeped {al} - [AABF06] Homer goes to a dinner theater {jg} - [AABF08] the episode begins with a SES field trip {al} - [AABF16] Uter's mother is the German woman from the Olympic committee in AABF16 "The Old Man and the C Student"? {bmn} - [AABF23] Herbie the Love Bug seen {bjr} - [AABF23] Restaurant named "Zesty's" {al} ============================================================================== > Freeze frame fun ============================================================================== - Historic newspapers {bjr} SPRINGFIELD TIMES THE POST THE GLOBE MAN WAKS ON MOON IT'S V-E DAY! TITANIC SINKS 1500 DEAD HERALD JEWISH NEWS HOT SEX WEEKLY ZEP CRASH KILLS 31 STATE OF ISRAEL BORN - Nostalgic headlines kiosk {bjr} SPRINGFIELD SHOPPER SEE THE HEADLINES DAILY 5¢ FROM THE DAY UNUSUALLY LARGE, YOU WERE BORN UGLY BABY BORN [photo of Homer] - Headlines from first review {bjr} COD IS GREAT SCROD IS GOOD - Planet Springfield posters {bjr} IT'S ERNEST GOES PAT! STRAIGHT TO VIDEO - Planet Springfield exhibits {bjr} THE MUG FROM THE CANE FROM HEARTBEEPS CITIZEN KANE - Homer's dinner-theater review {bjr} |Astrology SPRINGFIELD SHOPPER INSIDE |Comics LIFESTYLES LIFEWAYS |Crossword Puzzles TODAY |Letters |Reviews NUTS TO SOUP KRUSTY: WORST by HOMER SIMPSON KING LEAR IN FOOD CRITIC 400 YEARS - Sign at restaurateurs' meeting {bjr} WE ARRRR CLOSED - Capt. McAllister's review {bjr} THAR, SHE BLOWS! - Booths at the "Taste of Springfield" fair {bjr} The UGLI Gilded Truffle AH, FUDGE! MOLEMAN'S |Q. Butterfat's [bowl] |lavors GRUEL |Parlor THE TEXAS CHEESECAKE THE FRENCH CONFECTION DEPOSITORY The [German WWI helmet] Hungry Hun ============================================================================== > Animation, continuity, and other goofs ============================================================================== * Matt Groening in couch gag scene is shown writing his name on the rug RIGHT-HANDED. Simpsonus Obsessivus know that Groening is actually left- handed in real life. {djm} * Why were parents forced to car pool to the field trip? I thought Springfield had an unending fleet of buses, most of which were at least DRIVABLE? {rg} * Why are Bart's class(the 4th grade) and Lisa's class (the 2nd) together on a field trip? {er} * Uter did not disappear during the last field trip [Assuming the "last one" was the school's outing to the fort in "The PTA Disbands (2F19) -- Ed.], as Bart said. There was a field trip after that, the trip to the police station in the military school episode. {rg2} c Words bleeped out were standard euphemisms in closed captioning. {hl} [See "Comments" section for more -- Ed.] * The ambulance that cut Homer off didn't have its siren on; doesn't that mean it's subject to the same rules of the road as other vehicles? {ddg} * Someone obviously carried the robot dummy up to the desk. How could they not notice? {th} + The Springfield Shopper has gone from non-free to free and then non-free again. {ddg} * "Screw Flanders" has two "e"s, yet Homer included the phrase repeatedly in his first review. [Sarah Culp suggests he wrote, "Scroo Flandirs." Dale G. Abersold thinks it might be, "Scruw Flandirs.] * How did Homer spell "truffle" and "bread" on his typewriter, if it doesn't have an "E"? [Conceivably, Homer misspelled the words, but the copy editor fixed them before the articles ran -- Ed.] {ddg} * Don't the Simpsons have two bathrooms (a main one, and one off the parents' bedroom)? Why doesn't Lisa just use the other one? [Michael Neylon responds, "I know at least as a kid, the master bathroom was OFF LIMITS for kids."] {bjr} - The second time you see Lisa's shelves there is a globe on top of it, but do not appear at any other point. {rg} * Since Uter is an exchange student, his parents shouldn't have been in Springfield, unless they got airline tickets to Springfield to search for their child. {jk} c In the Closed Captions, Uter is spelled, "Uta." {rg} * The movie, "Heartbeeps", doesn't have a mug. {ms} * "Citizen Kane" did have a cane. It's appeared in the production number at the cafe scene honoring Kane. {ms} - The desktop ball-toy disappears from Homer's shirt. {je} = The view from the revolving restaurant was much too low relative to what was shown on the establishing shot. It looked like they were only on about the 4th floor looking out. {th} + At Luigi's, Lisa had a spaghetti plate with MEATballs on it ... I will not believe that a place such as that would serve tofuballs. {rg} + Homer's ear healed rather quickly. (I wasn't expecting him to walk around with a chunk of ear missing, but it would have been funny to see a Band-Aid on it or something.) {bjr} * By the end, Homer can write rather well without Lisa so what was his worry about her leaving? (Possible explanation: He may not have realized he could write without her.) {bjr} + Why would Captain McAllister be mad at Homer's review of the Frying Dutchman? It was written while Homer was still writing nice reviews. {ds} * The Shopper is obviously no "small town paper" as Marge described it. {th} = When Hans Moleman appears in the angry mob at the end of the episode, he's colored brown? {cp} ============================================================================== > Reviews ============================================================================== Wilson Banswell: This episode was so-so. The idea was semi-original. It had old premise of Homer gets a new job. However, at least this job was something that Homer might actually have, instead of Navy Reservist or Trucker. Anyway, the plot itself was pretty good. I wish that Homer didn't become jerkass Homer though. At the first act, Homer was great, dumb Homer. However, he transformed into Jerkass Homer in the second act. Also, many of the second and third act "jokes" fell flat. Overall, this would be a C+, for the great couch gag, and the running Uter gag. (C+) Nate Birch: Al Jean is very quickly becoming my favorite writer of the later seasons, with the possible exception of Dan Greaney. [Ironically, Jean was one of the show's *first* writers -- Ed.] This episode was like a lot of other episodes from season 10 and 11, it was all about Homer getting a new job, filled with "wacky" physical humor, but for some reason, unlike "Beyond Blunderdome", this episode's wackiness didn't bug me. I found that almost everything that happened seemed plausible, even though I'm not sure why. [...] This episode seemed a lot less frantic than other recent episodes. On top of this it was one of the funniest episodes since season 9, I laughed from beginning to end, which is what a good Simpsons is supposed to do. So far best episode of season 11, and season 10. (A+) Nathan DeHoff: In "Maximum Homerdrive," Homer complained that his adventures almost always resulted in someone trying to kill him. I'd say that this was one of my complaints about this episode. In fact, much about this episode had been done before; it was pretty much standard "Homer gets a new job" fare. This new job was one of the more plausible ones he's had recently, though, and it allowed for some amusing scenes, many of which occurred in restaurants that had been featured in previous episodes. It was pretty good as far as typical "Homer's new job" episodes go. (C+) Don Del Grande: This started out as a good episode, but when it changed from "Homer likes everything" to "Homer makes it a point not to like anything, and everyone around him hates him as a result", the show lost its edge -- and the "Homer is about to kill himself, but at the last second everything pretty much turns out OK" gets old after seeing it happen to Fry pretty much every week on "Futurama". And what was with "We'll be right back"? (B-) Nicolas Di Candia: This episode would probably have seemed better if there had not been that many "Homer gets a job" episodes recently (this was the second episode of this kind this season, and it was the third episode of the season). This particular job fits more to Homer's character (which is more than what we can say about Hollywood consultant, bodyguard or trucker). Some nice gags (I loved the "non-fat" bit at the end) and a good use of Lisa, which has not been frequent lately, help this episode to get a B in my book. (B) Jordan Eisenberg: This season has been pretty shallow, but hasn't once lost its comedic energy so far. Tonight's was rewatchably great. However, a lot of the lines seemed to be lifted directly from previous episodes (see "Previous Eps.") More than a few times, I was distracted from the show because it struck me that a line was quoted verbatim from an old episode by the very same character. I thought the Homer-is-hunted ending would have been more suspenseful had the show been less detached from reality up to that point. As it stood, I didn't really seem to care if Homer was going to be killed or not! Funny episode nonetheless. I loved the humor about newspapers and telemarketing. (B+) Richard Green: Okay ... ANOTHER Homer gets a new job episode ... fabulous. Honestly, I think this was one of the worst "jobs" yet, and didn't even really have many funny moments. While I'll admit that this episode is at least as good as the other 2 we've seen so far (even though we've yet to actually see a REAL Season 11 ep), it was really still really lacking the charm that the show used to have [...]. This episode DID has some funny moments, the fake Homer at SNPP scene comes to mind the fastest, but as usual they were mostly in the first act and one or two in the second, and the third act just plain sucked. The "conspire to murder Homer" theme really didn't work at all ... was that scene in The Frying Dutchmen extremely longs, or was it just me? (C) Tony Hill: Well, this was a pretty good episode. Makes me wish they'd used it as the season premiere instead of "Beyond Blunderdome." The big question is, whatever did they do to Ed Asner's voice? The "no comeuppance" scene was SO funny. I was just thinking Homer's comeuppance is what the third act was for when Homer said "we'll be right back." ROTFL!!! The pork chop scene was utterly predictable, but otherwise this is good for an (A) Carl Johnson: Impressive beginning disintegrates not far into act two. The gags in the latter part were corny and half-buttocked, the story died out as soon as Homer caved in to peer pressure. Much was going for this episode, but it, like Lance Murdoch, managed to fall back into the shark-infested water after coming so close to success. (D+) Darrel Jones: Another great entry from Season Eleven. I don't understand why the nay-sayers hate these episodes. Act One was chock-full of great gags, especially Homer's "replacement" and the "stop the presses!" bit. I also liked the use of Lisa; this is more exposure than she's gotten lately. The mob ending was freakin' hilarious! Only thing keeping this ep from an A+ is the "Homer's beeping" part; what the hell was that? (A) Joe Klemm: The opening act, with the school going on a field trip to the newspaper HQ, was clever and a very funny way to start the episode. It loses some steam when during the second act, yet the writers prevent this from being an "asshole Homer" episode by coming up with a clever third act bit where Springfield's restaurant owners plot to kill Homer. However, I definitely find the ending, where most of Springfield chase Homer and Lisa, to be unnecessary and a dumb way to end the episode. (B-) Ondre Lombard: Once again, I can count on two hands (maybe one) how many good jokes I thought there were, and it'd take too long to go into the ones I hated. [...] To critique the episode on a whole rather than just particularly, the way the episode flows fails to sell Homer the restaurant critic and therefore makes it just yet another stupid, far fetched job for him with another stupid, nefarious and outrageous ending. At the risk of seeming negative just to be different like Homer was, I say this was a rather bad episode. (D+) Adam Long: Well, it wasn't anything too special, but I liked it. Sure it was another predictable "Homer-Gets-A-New-Job-And-Wackiness-Ensues" episode, but at least this time it was a believable job for him. Lots of good stuff in the first act, and the second act wasn't without its charm, but the third act and ending were generally pretty weak (except for "Thar, She Blows" which was downright hilarious, IMHO). I found it a bit dull from the assassination planning on. Krusty as King Lear could've been a lot funnier than it was as well (though I did like the "Worst King Lear in 400 years" headline). All in all I found the episode pretty entertaining, but I think it had the potential to be better. (B+) Patrick McGovern: Alright, it was far fetched, and LOTS of the gags didn't work (see: Homer Cursing, Stop the Presses!, the meeting in the Frying Dutchman etc), but I really can't believe how much I LAUGHED here. Even stuff that normally would make me want to wretch (like the collection of catty shrew critics), seemed to work here. Not great, but still funny IMNSHO. (C+) John Plaskett: Three episodes into the eleventh season and I am not pleased. The episode started off groin-grabbingly good, but the quality cesdended. The episode was only sorta good, not lexcesant. Well, I think it's safe to say that the UN has done its job. Screw Flanders. Screw Flanders. Screw Flanders. Screw Flanders. Screw Flanders. Screw Flanders. Screw Flanders. Screw Flanders. (C+) Abhi Ray: Episodes like this make me scratch my head and wonder WHY did the writers decide to write garbage like this. [...] Honestly, how much humor can be found in Homer's new job as a food critic? We got a few jokes on the restaurant business, but the rest of the time is occupied by an overbearing obnoxious Homer, and jokes that just came out of nowhere for no reason but to fill the time (like Homer suddenly watching Patty and Selma exercising). The Homer plot in which he's a food critic is totally lifeless, like most of the AABF series. He gets a job after singing, writes good reviews, everyone likes it, then he writes bad reviews, then the restaurant business goes down. Well, at least there is a faint glimmer of good writing, once we get to the scene with assassins trying to kill Homer, but I still scratched my head and asked WHY? (D) Tom Rinschler: A very funny episode! Usually episodes where Homer gets a new job are often (rightly) hated by this group, but this time, the job he takes makes perfect sense. I enjoyed the Lisa-Homer interplay in this episode, as well as several ROFL scenes (The "missing Uter" scenes for example). I also liked the first look into the "Springfield Shopper" as well as the fact the writers resurrected every restaurant and restaurant owner in the long history of OFF. Only a few jarring scenes (such as the "beeping scene") marred this episode. (A-) Matt Rose: Since it's obvious the show's not the same anymore, I've decided to be more lenient and just watch it on one level. And it does alright in that department. I'm just disappointed in how this episode seems to run together with so many before it. I mean, the "Homer gets a new job" thing is so run into the ground now; they aren't fooling anybody. I enjoyed a lot of the restaurant jokes and characters ("The French Confection", that's a good one). I really think though that there wasn't a lot of effort behind this episode to make it funny, just like so many others of the Scully era. It seemed like this one was pretty half-assed all the way around. (C) Eric Sansoni: Quite possibly the funniest of the AABF series. I was laughing too often and too hard to think about whether this was too Homer-centric or just another "new job" episode. One example of many laugh-out-loud moments: "9 thumbs up, what was that?" Al Jean offers more proof that the best Simpsons writer is a veteran Simpsons writer, with his best solo episode to date. This is the funny Homer I love, the slow-witted but well-intentioned American male, who tries his best but never quite gets the entire point all at once. Act three was closer to a McBain parody than a "fractured take on modern life," but the humor throughout was in fine classic tradition without being derivative. (A-) Mike Smith: Another well-written episode from Al Jean. An A! SCREW FLANDERS. (A) Dan Touchette: This episode shows how important supporting characters are to the show's quality in its longevity. The writers can explore these lesser people for fresh ideas. Homer the food critic didn't show me anything new -- but who knew the town's restaurateurs were sinister enough to consider assassination? Not a great episode, but it does make me wonder which subjects "The Simpsons" has yet to lampoon. (B-) Yours Truly: Unlike the critics at the Shopper, I enjoy writing about episodes I like more than I do about shows that disappoint me, and I liked tonight's show. Nice writing balance keeps the story grounded enough to be believable (until the third act, which is a little over the top), and there's some great scenes with Homer and Lisa. Ed Asner is excellent as a gruff newspaper editor (what else?). Something of a throwback to the days where the show relied on finely-tuned dialogue and situations and intelligent humor, "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner" is a tasty morsel that I have no troubles recommending. (A-) AVERAGE GRADE: B- (2.78) Std Dev.: 0.9657 (31 reviews computed) ============================================================================== > Comments and other observations ============================================================================== >> Musical References "Margaritaville" by Jimmy Buffett {hl} >> Meta-reference corner Tony Hill: Right before commercial, Homer says, "We'll be right back." Later, he says, "Something bad happens when I go anyplace." >> WAR AND PEACE: Two Thumbs Down Jeff Cross sums up the truth behind this episode: It seems that critics and the public are never on the same wavelength. Whatever the public likes, the critics despise, and vice versa. I remember in the summer of 1997 that BOSTON GLOBE film critic Jay Carr hated every movie that came out save ULEE'S GOLD and, for some inexplicable reason, FACE/OFF. I think the reason critics hate everything is because they stop to analyze whatever they're reviewing rather than going along with the visceral thrill that everybody else gets. When I was an entertainment critic for my college newspaper, I was very much like Homer in giving good reviews to most of what I saw or read. Eventually they wanted me to analyze why it was good; when I did, I wasn't having as much fun anymore than when I was just enjoying the ride. >> "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize" and "I&S&P" -- separated at birth Michael K. Neylon ponders: Ok, I might be pushing it here ... however, I'd like to argue that this recent episode has ties to Itchy and Scratchy and Pootie in that it makes jabs at us. Some of these include: (a) the sudden reference to Homers job, (b) the continuity with regards to the missing Uter, and (c) the entire idea of "critics" that start with excellent reviews early, then make very mean takes. The last one is particularly pointing fingers to people like Ondre and those that prefer the older episodes. However, unlike I&S&P, when the writers say that the critics reviews don't matter, this episode says that the bad reviews ruin the show, and the writers would like to get back at us. Ok, so this is a stretch, but the poor connections in this episode really make me think that there was a message here. Capel Cleggs: The problem with that analogy, I think, is that the actual critics-- the people who write about TV for newspapers and magazines, and are therefore the direct equivalents of Homer's food-critic job--are still praising the show to the skies. I doubt that the net reviews (which are predominantly negative) matter more to the writers than to the professional reviews (which are almost always positive). Also, in this episode we see that Homer's negative food-reviews are the equivalent of a TV critic who trashes bad TV shows (though Homer is furious at that critic for doing so). So this episode isn't about someone who writes negative reviews of a prestigious product (like "The Simpsons"), but rather about someone (Homer) who goes from liking everything indiscriminately to acquiring a more "sophisticated palate." It's about how Homer's taste improves, and the moral appears to be that having good taste is dangerous! Eric Sansoni: If there is any commentary on the quality of criticism, it's that too much of anything is no good. Homer goes from liking everything to hating everything. Not once is he ever in balance. If you think that his second style of criticism was actually the appropriate way to do the job, it's no wonder you're drawn to [alt.tv.simpsons]. ;-) >> INHERIT THE WIND: The Next Generation Jeff Cross: In 1999, the Kansas Board of Education decided to take a backwards step in science by discontinuing the teaching of evolution. Their logic for this move is that the theory of evolution was "dogmatic." Evan Ross adds: Another state, I forget which, has also gone through and replaced "evolution" with "change over time." Benjamin Robinson: For years, people have argued whether or not creationism (the belief that everything in the universe was created directly by God in six days) should be taught in schools, either alongside or in place of evolution. Also for years, the courts have ruled that creationism, being a purely religious doctrine, could not be taught in public schools without violating the separation of church and state. The Kansas Board of Education recently introduced a new wrinkle -- evolution was no longer a required part of the cirriculum. Science teachers inside and outside the state immediately assailed the decision as wrong-headed and unscientific. (In fairness, I should note that the board is apparently not actively preventing the teaching of evolution.) The decision hit the news only a couple months ago, so either someone on the "Simpsons" staff had to hustle to insert a last-minute reference, or the writers got very lucky with "predicting" the news. >> At least they didn't call it the Springfield Times-Post-Globe-Herald-Jewish News-Hot Sex Weekly Benjamin Robinson: (Actually, they couldn't call it that, since it's a daily paper.) The tour guide mentioned that the Springfield Shopper bought out six other publications, to become the town's #1 newspaper (presumably by default). In this respect, the Shopper reflects a trend toward newspaper consolidation seen in the rest of the country. At around the turn of the century, it wasn't unusual to for a major city like New York to have five or six newspapers. Slowly, the news landscape began to change. Television, radio, "USA Today," magazines, and now the internet competed with the traditional newspapers to provide people with their daily headlines, Lotto numbers, and celebrity scandals. Readership dwindled, and papers either merged with other papers, or folded altogether. Today, only the largest metropolises have more than one mainstream newspaper (leaving aside underground and niche publications). >> Ooh, someone call the "South Park" writers Jordan Eisenberg: It's funny ... Homer's words in the beginning were bleeped out, but none of them were actually curses! From the CC: (Words in [brackets] were bleeped.) "Hey, you [dingus], you cut me off! Ah, yeah, [screw] you!" ... "[Stupid] Ambulance! You think you're so big with your [damn] [] siren and your letters on backwards!" >> V-E Day Benjamin Robinson explains one of the more cryptic newspaper headlines: "V-E" day refers to "Victory in Europe," marking the defeat of the European portion of the Axis powers in World War II. In a similar vein, "V-J" refers to "Victory in Japan," which was [also] the end of the war. >> Where's Johnny Videoarcadeseed when you need him? Tom Rinschler explains the inspiration for "Johnny Newspaperseed": Johnny Appleseed was a semi-legendary character in the American Midwest. He traveled throughout the area when it was just being settled, planting apple seeds so that the area would have plenty of the fruit. >> Oh, so I guess they're not the same person Tony Hill: Ann Landers and Dear Abby, formerly the Friedman twins of Sioux City, Iowa, have been competing advice columnists since 1955. Their real names are Esther Pauline (Eppie) Lederer [Ann] and Pauline Esther (Popo) Phillips [Abby]. They celebrated their 81st birthdays this past July 4. (Please don't ask me how I remember all this.) Todd Emerson: They're also notorious for helping to spread urban legends, mostly sent in by readers who claim, "This really happened to me!" >> A particular thing is missing in his writing, but what? - or, I *Don't* want no stinkin' nonconsonant. Homer isn't the first fellow to try getting by without an "e", as Tony Hill explains: Writing something without using a certain letter of the alphabet is called an oulip. Just for fun, I once rewrote the Gettysburg Address without using the letter E. You can read it at http://www.nyx.net/~thill/gettysbg.noe. (Wow, that's two plugs for stuff at my website in one capsule.) Andrew Gill: Bill is right. Although an Anglican work usually contains a majority of a nonconsonant (fifth in a chain of 26), it's not crucial. G*org*s P*r*c omits this nonconsonant whilst scribing _A Void_, about 300 pp. of book in Bourbon lingua franca. Gilb*rt Adair did soon transform _A Void_ into an Anglican manuscript, still sans the fifth. Quoth a black bird, "Not again!" Perec also wrote another novel that used only the letter e (plus consonants.) Haynes Lee shows us how this might work: [Ernest Wright's "Gadsby" is a] novel written entirely without using the letter e. Here's an excerpt from page one "If youth, throughout all history, had a champion to stand up for it; to show a doubting world that a child can think; and, possibly, do it practically; you wouldn't constantly run across folks today who claim that 'a child don't know anything.' A child's brain starts functioning at birth; and has, amongst its many infant convolutions, thousands of dormant atoms, into which God has put a mystic possibility for noticing an adults act, and figuring out its purport." ... and the last page "A glorious full moon sails across a sky without a cloud. A crisp night air has folks turning up coat collars and kids hopping up and down for warmth. And that giant star, Sirius, winking slyly, knows that soon, now, that light up in His Honors room window will go out. Fttt! It *is* out! So, as Sirius and Luna hold an all-night vigil, I'll say a soft 'Goodnight' to all our happy bunch, and to John Gadsby -- Youth's Champion. Finis." >> Sadly, she missed her chance to get an Apple Lisa Benjamin Robinson comments on a Simpson family milestone: With little fanfare, it appears that Lisa has gotten a computer. Aw, I was hoping for a "the Simpsons get a computer" story. Note also that Lisa evidently has a Windows-based PC, even though she strikes me as more of a Mac person. >> The film that almost killed Jim Carrey's career Joe Klemm: If there's one film Jim Carrey should have made second thoughts to when it comes to his 1994+ career, it has to be the "Cable Guy." A 1996 dark comedy, the film stars Carrey as a maniac posing as a worker of a cable system who makes life miserable for Matthew Broderick. The film, which was Jim's first film to have him make $20 million for working on it, was a bomb in the box office, yet Carrey was about to prove he still had the stuff months later with "Liar, Liar." >> Hidden messages? Jordan Eisenberg wonders: Does anyone else think this is a comment from some of the Simpsons writers who labor over a script in a group effort, only for the "Written By" credit to go to a single person? Lisa: "Wow, my first published article ... although someone else's name is on it." Homer: "Welcome to the humiliating world of professional writing." >> ¿Donde esta Uter? - (Sorry, I don't know any German) Many people pondered Uter's fate. Like Ernie Smith, for example: Hey, keep in mind that Uter hasn't been seen since the Civil War ep. :) "woozywink": I think it was in reference to "The PTA Disbands" because they mentioned it happened on the school's last field trip. I guess the writers either forgot about his small cameo in "Much Apu About Nothing" or just felt it ruined the joke. Pete Klassen: He also appeared in "Mayored to the Mob", wearing a "Futurama" T-shirt. "nevets14": Uter was also seen at the Health Fair in "Bart Star" trying to do a sit-up. Nathan DeHoff: Maybe Uter just has bad luck with field trips in general. "G. B. R.": Maybe they just wanted to get rid of the character like Bleeding Gums and Dr. Monroe. Noting how long it took for Uter's parents to go looking for him, Al Denton writes: Hey, yeah. Maybe Uter's mom was so busy with the Olympic committee thing that she didn't have time to spend with her child. . .so, like any normal parent would do, she put him up in an exchange program But now, since many Olympic committee officials are being kicked out because of charges of accepting bribes, she can finally spend time with Uter. That's why she just noticed now that he's missing. >> Sprechen Sie Deutsch? (Okay, so I got this one from Babelfish.) Claus Rasmussen: I'm not 100% sure about this, my downloaded RM-video is in pretty crappy quality, but I thought Uter's father said "Wer ist Uter?", rather than "Where is Uter?". If true, this an error because "Wer ist Uter?" is actually German for "_Who_ is Uter?". If he wanted to know where his son was, he should have asked "Wo ist Uter?" >> Planet Car Watch Benjamin Robinson: Herbie the Love Bug appears at Planet Springfield (hanging from the roof), and in the "Beyond Blunderdome" museum. This isn't a goof, since more than one Herbie the Love Bug VW was created to make the movie. (By the way, the other car at PS is a 1959 Cadillac, which is the signature vehicle for the Hard Rock Café restaurants.) [{cp}: "It also used to belong to Hans Moleman. :-P"] Speaking of cars, Hot Wheels are small metal toy cars sold here in America (and maybe other places as well). They're similar to Matchboxes, if you have those where you live. I agree with Homer; they aren't good pizza toppings. >> Critics' Casualties - "Platypus Man" Ondre Lombard: Platypus Man was one of the first three programs to air on UPN in 1995, and one of the first two sitcoms. It starred comedian Richard Jeni as "The Platypus Man" and was a very run-of-the-mill dating comedy. - "The Cosby Mysteries" Ondre, again: Soon after Bill Cosby's remake of "You Bet Your Life" failed, he did a series on CBS in the 1994-1995 season in which he played yet another elderly crime solver. The series did poorly both critically and Nielsen-wise and got cancelled. >> The 4th wall falls: "We'll be right back" Mike Juren: With Homer's "We'll be right back," this is the first time one of the Simpsons has faced the audience and addressed them DURING the episode in REFERRING to the episode itself as an episode. ["ungvichian" remembers that Bart talked directly to the audience at the end of "Bart the General (7G05)" -- Ed.] All the other times the audience was addressed, it had to do with the action INSIDE the episode. Once they came close during the end of "Who shot Mr. Burns", with the characters asking the audience to figure out the mystery in the episode, but it turned out they weren't asking the audience at all but talking to Chief Wiggum. This just goes to show how much admirable restraint the writers and creators have had to have exercised to not have done this for 101/2 seasons and then finally when they do use it to use it for a cheap laugh as if it were no big deal, when it was really a great shock to those who have closely watched the show in its 101/2 season run. Early in the century there was a playwright named Berthold Brecht who I believe may have pioneered the practice of talking to the audience about the play as a play. I think they called it "tearing down the fourth wall" or "using the fourth wall" because a play normally only has three walls that the actors need to worry about. Eric Sansoni: It may have bothered you, but as you state above, this is a tried-and-true comedic principle. Used judiciously, and perhaps sparingly, it is a good device for providing an additional layer of commentary on the action. Another classic comedy that made use of it: Ferris Bueller's Day Off. The moment on the show tonight was very funny to me, probably because the gag had nothing to do with the breaking of the 4th wall. It was just the strongest way to underline Homer's arrogance, by subtly indicating that after 200+ shows he's awfully ignorant not to realize these kind of things get settled in the 3rd act. About who acknowledged the fourth wall, David Brunt wrote: Yes Brecht is the first who acknowledged the fourth wall (1928 if you want to be precise, I can give you the play title, first performance, all the chapter and verse if you want). 1928, a good ten years after Oliver Hardy was going the same thing. >> My entry for the "I sure hope someone got fired for that one" contest Actually, Seth Miller's entry: In [tonight's episode], the French Chef states that his eclair contains One million calories. Rudimentary knowledge of nutrition sciences tells us that the most calorific substance is fat, at 9 calories per gram. Since there are approximately 28 grams in an ounce and 16 ounces in a pound, 1,000,000 divided by 9 divided by 28 divided by 16 tells us that the eclair, were it 100% fat, would weigh approximately 248 pounds. Assuming that it contains SOME non calorific matter and SOME less calorie dense carbohydrates, namely the sugar and flour that an eclair MUST contain, we can assume that the eclair weighs AT LEAST 300 pounds, which it clearly didn't, and, since eclairs are not particularly dense (in terms of sheer mass divided by volume), it would be at LEAST as large as a full grown human male. Is this supposed to be some sort of MAGICAL pastry? OF COURSE, he could have been, for no good reason, using proper calories instead of nutritional calories, which are in fact kilocalories, but this is improper for the given application. Sam Bell suggests: Maybe it contained (2,4,6)trinitrotoluene, which has very high enthalpy per gram Jordan Eisenberg: That might explain why the pastry exploded after Homer threw it. Ostap Bender: Actually, it wouldn't. TNT isn't shock-sensitive. That's why grenades have fuses (and pencils have erasers). Besides, that éclair didn't explode. It just fell into a smoking crater. Seth Miller, again: I was still referring to DIETETIC calories, and very few people are actually able to digest such poison AND convert it into calories. [...] I JUST LOOKED UP THE SYMPTOMS OF POISONING FROM TRINITROTOLUENE: "Yellow skin, hair and nails." >> Miscellaneous, Etc. The Haynes Lee alterna-title for this show is: The Food Critic Jordan Eisenberg's Alterna-alterna-title: "A Taste for the Danger" Richard Green: One of the reviewed restaurants is called "PattE LaBelle". At the almost EXACT same time that this is mentioned, NBC was showing the real Patty LaBelle singing the National Anthem for game 2 of the world series. Tony Hill contributes these next three items: Ed Asner also played an editor on TV's "Lou Grant" form 1977 to 1982. (For more information, read my episode guide: http://www.nyx.net/~thill/lou_grant.html) Johnny Carson's third wife was Joanna. She came after Jody and Joanne. In Canada, some John Deere equipment is yellow. Haynes Lee: Planet Hollywood [is] now under bankruptcy protection, showing what can happen during an eight month production run for "The Simpsons." Benjamin Robinson: It really does take an eternity to start newspaper presses. They're only stopped in case of emergency. ============================================================================== > Quotes and Scene Summary {bg} ============================================================================== % Ever wonder why Springfield Elementary's test scores are so low? % Maybe it's because the students are too busy going on field trips to % learn anything. This time, the students are off to visit the local % newspaper. Skinner: I hope you all enjoy your ride to and tour of the Springfield Shopper newspaper. Groundskeeper Willie and I will stay behind to remove all traces of asbestos and the word "evolution" from our school. Willie: [comes out of the school, wearing a Hawaiian shirt] Next stop, Margaritaville! [notices the students] Oh, they're still here. -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Skinner tries to marshal the students for the trip. Skinner: Now, I'd like to ask each child to pair up with a buddy so no one gets lost. Bart: Come to think of it I haven't seen Uter since the last field trip. Skinner: Uter. I don't remember any Uter. Silly name, Uter. -- Must be some sort of magic Uter, "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Several parents -- Homer included -- have volunteered to take the % students on the field trip. Lisa wonders how Homer was able to get % away from the demands of his job. He assures her he's got it % covered. % % Cut to scene at Springfield Nuclear Power Plant. We find a terrible % mock-up of Homer (bucket head, tree branches with gloves on them, % cassette tape player on lap) sitting in his chair. Homer: [voice on cassette, singing] I work hard for the money So hard for the money Oh, I something, something money, Come on give me lots of honey Burns: Well, there's an employee, Smithers. A smile on his lips and a song in his heart. Promote him. -- Career advancement the Homer way, "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Cut to scene of same mock-up of Homer in chair now sitting in an % office. After a few seconds of garbled song resulting from the % dying batteries in the cassette player, a spark shoots out and % starts a fire in the office. % % Meanwhile, the real Homer drives Milhouse, Nelson, Bart, and Lisa. % Despite having to share the road with Springfield's intrepid % ambulance corps, Homer makes it safely to the zoo. Homer: Here we are, kids. The zoo. [?]Bart: Well, that's great Dad, except you were suppose to drive us to the newspaper. Homer: D'oh! [echoing] -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Homer gets to the Shopper just in time for the start of the tour of % Springfield Shopper. Guide: Welcome to the Springfield Shopper, established in 1883. The newspaper was founded by Johnny Newspaperseed, a 14 year-old boy who roamed America founding newspapers. Homer: If he's so smart, how come he's dead? Guide: Over the years, the Shopper merged with the Springfield Times, Post, Globe, Herald, Jewish News and Hot Sex Weekly to become Springfield's number one newspaper. -- Is this how Rupert Murdoch got started? "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Lisa looks at the rows of cubicles with busy reporters, and marvels % at the journalistic activity. The camera pans past the cubicles to % reveal the "reporters" are just telemarketers trying to sell % subscriptions. % % The tour stops at a solitary man in a small room, working at an % easel. Guide: And this is our comic strip department. Who here reads "Mary Worth"? [everyone is silent] Let's move on. [they do, and the man slumps across his easel in frustration] -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Next stop: Two elderly twins in stasis tubes. Guide: This is where we store Ann Landers and Dear Abby for their 23 hours of daily sleep. Ann Landers: My advice is to free us or to let us die -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Elsewhere in the newsroom, Homer and Bart stand in front of a kiosk. % It contains a terminal that can display front pages of "Shopper" % back issues. Bart: Check it out Dad, you can print out the headline from the day you were born Homer: Ooh, pointless nostalgia! [keys in his birth date. A paper appears showing a Homer- like baby with the headline, "Unusually Large, Ugly Baby Born"] I'd sure hate to be him! Eeew! -- It sucks to be you, "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % The tour has moved to the press area. The guide proudly points out % each copy contains "a certain percentage" of recycled newsprint. % She seems less proud when Lisa makes her admit that the "certain % percentage" is zero. Outside, entire trees (including a boy in a % treehouse) are fed into the printing plant as raw material. % % Homer smells something tastier that post-consumer recycled paper. Homer: Hey, I smell cake! Cake that says [sniffs air] farewell and [sniffs again] best wishes! Nelson: Your old man has an awesome nose. Bart: Oh, that's nothing. He can hear pudding. -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % What Homer smells is the spread laid out for the Shopper's food % critic, who's retiring today. Editor: So, Mimi, this little shindig is our way of saying farewell to our favourite food critic. Mimi: What can I say, except thanks for the predictable champagne, pizza that's hardly numero uno and ice-cream cake that reminds us why make 31 flavours when you can't get vanilla right? Editor: I wouldn't want to be married to her. I mean, again. -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Homer comes by and samples the wares, much to Mimi's ire. Mimi: Who are you and why are you ruining my retirement party? Homer: I'll have you know I wandered off from the tour. Editor: Well, at least you like the food. Homer: Oh, I like food alright ... [Homer breaks into song] I like pizza, I like bagels, I like hot gods with mustard and beer Editor: I get the picture Homer: [continues, ignoring him] I'll eat eggplant, I could even eat a baby deer La-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la! Who's that baby deer on the lawn there? Editor: Enough already! Homer: Sorry. Editor: Hey listen, I just had a thought. We're looking for a new food critic. Someone who doesn't immediately pooh-pooh everything he eats. Homer: No, it usually takes a few hours. Editor: Look, I'd like to give you a tryout. Write a 500-word sample review, if it passes muster we'll put you on staff. Homer: Thanks for the chance. You won't never regret this Mr. Editing-guy. -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Back at Home ... Marge: You know Homey, The "E" doesn't work on that typewriter. Homer: We don't need no stinkin' "E". Restaurant Review? ... no. Eatery Evaluation? ... no. Food Box: Go or No Go by Homer ... no ... Earl! ... no ... Bill Simpson. -- "Guss Who's Coming To Criticiz Dinnr?" % Bill, er, Homer submits his review to Mr. Editing Guy. Editor: [laughs] Homer: Well, what do you think? Editor: This is a joke, right? I mean this is the stupidest thing I've ever read! Homer: What's wrong with it? Editor: You keep using words like "Pasghetti" and "Momatoes" You make numerous threatening references to the UN and at the end you repeat the words "Screw Flanders" over and over again. Homer: Oh, it's so hard to get to 500 words. -- Even harder without an "e" key, "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % The Editor is just about to tell Homer he isn't working out, when % Homer promises to come back with the "real" review. He goes home, % but all he can do is to hole up in the bathroom, trying to scrub off % the stink of failure. Lisa, desperate to answer Nature's call, % promises to help Homer with his article in exchange for bathroom % access. % % Later that night, Lisa makes good on her promise. She and Homer sit % in front of the computer in her room. Homer: OK, what restaurant did we review? Lisa: Well, we went to Pate LaBelle last week, how about that? Homer: Great, now let me think. The food was ... [Homer tastes his food-stained shirt to remind himself of the restaurant] ... was not un-delicious Lisa: [typing] The food is delicious. Homer: Ooh! That's brilliant! And they had this sweet, sweet chocolate mousse. Really, the only word to describe it is [drools lustily]. Lisa: Hmm. What's the English equivalent for [imitates Homer]? I'd say ... transcendent. Homer: How about groin-grabbingly transcendent? Lisa: Uh ... I don't think so. Homer: We make a good team. A groin-grabbingly good team! [... a little later ...] Lisa: 497 ... 498 words. Homer: How about screw Flanders! Lisa: Bon Appetite! Homer: Ah, they're both good. -- Great collaborations, "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Back at Springfield Shopper ... Editor: [reading Homer's review] Not bad, not bad at all! We're going to run this on page one ... of section H-2. Homer: Whoo-hoo! Stop the presses! [Man hits stop button, wrecking havoc in the plant] Homer: OK, Start the presses. Editor: That takes four hours. Homer: Whatever, I'll be at Moe's. -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % [End of Act One. Time: 7:33] % % Homer, along with his family, dives right into his new job. Marge: This is so exciting Homey, your first restaurant review. Homer: Marge, Shh. It's important that no one knows I'm a food critic. Ned: Hear that Maude? Homer's a critic! Maude: Homer's a critic, pass it on! Skinner: Did you hear? Homer's a critic. Uter's Father: Quit changing the subject. Where is Uter? Uter's Mother: Oh, we just want closure. -- Did *you* ever come to the wrong place, "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Captain McAllister brings by Homer's dinner (the "critic special") % personally. Homer can't believe his good luck -- being paid to eat! % The only way it could get better, according to Bart, is if Homer % could draw a salary for scratching his butt. % % The Shopper duly publishes Homer's next review ("Cod is Great, Scrod % is Good"). Lisa reads it contentedly. Lisa: Wow, my first published article ... although someone else's name is on it. Homer: Welcome to the humiliating world of professional writing. But this is only the beginning. -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Indeed it is. The Simpsons visit Planet Springfield, a Hollywood- % themed restaurant decorated with knick-knacks like a coffee mug from % "HeartBeeps" and the cane from "Citizen Kane." ("Wait a minute," % Lisa realizes, "there's was no cane in 'Citizen Kane!'") Later, % Homer reviews Springfield's famous revolving restaurant. He likes % both the food and the view -- until Homer's table rotates past Patty % and Selma's apartment. % % Reviewing Springfield's eateries brings Homer an unexpected benefit % -- the respect of the townspeople. Lenny: Hey Homer, great call on that chicken place! And on that rib place! I never knew everything was so good! Homer: Look Marge, I'm making a difference in people's lives! [we see that all of Springfield's denizens have become overweight] Burns: Yes Simpson, your love of food is contagious. I've never felt jollier! [bone crunching sound] Oooh. There go my shinbones again. -- Making a *big* difference, "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Meanwhile, at the Springfield Shopper ... Editor: Hey Homer, c'mere. Homer: Oh ... are you going to fire my for swiping office supplies? Editor: No. [Homer grabs something off someone's desk and puts it under his shirt] Some of your fellow critics wanted to meet you. This is Garth Tralawney, TV critic. Homer: Why you, you made them cancel "Platypus Man!" [shakes Tralawney] Editor: Homer! This is our theatre critic, Daphne Beaumont Homer: [shaking the TV critic again] ... and the "Cosby Mysteries." That show had limitless possibilities! Editor: Homer, please! Homer: Sorry. Killday: Jamie Killday, farm supply critic. Just got back from the gopher poison show in Paris. Let me tell you something, people, the days of clubbing them with a baseball bat are [emphasis] over. Homer: For you, perhaps. Tralawney: Listen, we've been meaning to have a talk with you about your reviews. Everything's a rave! Nine thumbs up, what the hell is that? Homer: I've given out my share of bad reviews Beaumont: Oh, the only bad review you gave was to a slice of pizza you found under the couch. Homer: It lost some points because it had a Hot Wheel on it. Killday: Good Lord, man, you're a critic! You don't have to like everything, e.g., my latest review. [reading] We see John Deere has come out with this years line of roto- tillers. Surprise, surprise, they're green. I say it's time to time to send John Deere a Dear John. Homer: [laughing] Oh, that's classic. Killday: You don't have to patronize me. Homer: [stops laughing abruptly] OK. -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % The review beat takes Homer to a dinner theater. Actor: Lord, thy daughters Gonoril, Regan and Cordelia Krusty: [as King Lear] What is this Merry Old England or Petticoat Junction? [boos and hisses from the audience] Krusty: Hey, lighten up, it's a comedy! Actor: [whispers] No it's not Krusty: It's not?! -- Improv at the Avon, "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Cut to Homer with Lisa in the audience, reviewing the dinner. Homer: This pea soup is as weak as the acting and nowhere near as hammy. Lisa: Dad, that's so mean! Homer: The other critics told me to be mean and you should always give in to peer pressure. Lisa: But what if someone bad tells me to ... Homer: Always. -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Back to the action on the stage ... Whoa, this material stinks. I'm going to have to punch it up on the fly! Oh, I got one How do you make a King Lear? Put the Queen in a bikini! [more boos and hisses] Here's another one: "Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Juliet." "Juliet who?" "Juli-Ate so much pasta e fagiolo Romeo doesn't want her anymore!" [more boos] Ooh. Tough crowd. They're booing Shakespeare! -- Krusty, trying to improve on the Bard, "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % The next day's "Shopper" reveals Homer's scathing review, calling % Krusty the worst King Lear in four hundred years. % % The nasty trend in reviews continues at Luigi's, where Homer % disparages the lasagna. The chef doesn't take it well; he attacks % Homer with a knife, slicing off a small piece of Homer's ear. % % Even Marge doesn't escape Homer's judgement. Marge: Who wants pork chops?! Homer: [carefully tasting the food] Sorry Marge, I'm afraid this gets my lowest rating ever. Seven thumbs up. Marge: You always liked my pork chops. Homer: Marge, I'm sorry, but your cooking's only got two moves, Shake and Bake. Marge: You like Shake n' Bake. You used to put it in your coffee. Homer: People change, Marge. My palate has grown more sophisticated. Marge: Oh yeah, what's a palate? Homer: Oh ... it's a ... special time in a boys life when ... got to go! [rushes out] -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Cut to Homer in Lisa's room reciting a review. Homer: Some come to the Legless Frog if you want to get sick and die and leave a big garlicky corpse. P.S. Parking was ample. Lisa: Dad, you're being cruel for no reason! What will people think? Homer: People will think what I tell them you think when you tell me what to tell them to think! Lisa: Not anymore! I don't want to be partners with a man who thinks like that! [stalks off] Homer: Nobody talks to me that way. I'm Homer Simpson, the most powerful food critic in town, who will never get his comeuppance! You hear me? No comeuppance! [turns to the camera] We'll be right back. -- Who are *you* talking to? "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % [End of Act Two. Time: 13:43] % % Homer now attempts to write the review with Maggie and SLH. Homer: I don't need Lisa to write a good review. [reads] The food at the Gilded Truffle really ... What's a good word? [Maggie makes a sucking sound] Sucks! That's great! And the bread was really ... [looks at SLH] Come on, help me out here! SLH: Ruff! Homer: Rough? I don't know, you've been pitching that all night. SLH: Chewy? Homer: Chewy! That's inspired! -- Inspiration is where you find it, "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Back at Springfield Shopper, the Editor reviews Homer's latest % review. Editor: Homer what gives with this review? You say the salad tastes like bark and the potatoes were very [growls]. This reads like it was written by a dog. Homer: Are you crazy? A dog can't type. [under his breath] Unfortunately. Editor: Listen, you've got to shape up. Next week is the Taste of Springfield festival. You'll be reviewing every restaurant in town. Remember, people have certain expectations about the LifeWays section. Homer: Really, like what? Editor: Oh, I don't know. Astrology, "Brunhilda," vacation horror stories, articles about chronic fatigue syndrome. You know, chick crap. -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Meanwhile, Springfield's restaurateurs meet to plot their response % to Homer's reviews. Luigi: Homer, he's out of control. He gave me a bad review. So my friend put a horse head on the bed. He ate the head and gave it a bad review! True Story. McAllister: Argh, well I've had it with Homer. His bad reviews are sinking our businesses. Man: They why did you put yours in the window? McAllister: Argh, it's covered up the 'D' from the health inspector. Man: Well I say we ban Homer from our restaurants. Akira: No, that would be impolite. I say we kill him! -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Akira proposes that they kill Homer at the Taste of Springfield % festival. After some hesitation, the group agrees. A French chef % unveils what he thinks should be the instrument of Homer's demise: % An éclair. Man: Come on, you're going to kill him with a pastry? I've seen this man eat a bowl of change! Chef: This éclair is over one million calories. Twenty-five pounds of butter per square inch. Covered with chocolate so dark that light cannot escape its surface. [The other restaurateurs lunge for the savoury picture] No, no, no! This is just a picture. But Homer Simpson will find the real thing both delicious and deadly. Akira: Ah, yes, Death by Chocolate. Chef: ... and poison, I'll stick in some poison. -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Homer arrives at the Taste of Springfield festival. Marge: Homey, my women's intuition acting up. Something bad's going to happen if you go in there. Homer: Oh Marge, something bad usually happens to me when I go in anywhere. [He steps in a puddle, gets hit by Frisbee, then is attacked by a bat] A bat, now that's a new one. -- Life's an adventure, "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Homer has an awkward run-in with Lisa, who is covering the festival % for her school paper. Elsewhere, the Frenchman sets up shop and % prepares to make the lethal desert. % % Akira and McAllister look on as Homer serves another bad review to % Luigi. McAllister: Lard ho! 'Tis a good sign; Homer's unfastened the top button on his pants. Akira: Uh no, he's been walking around like that since Thanksgiving. McAllister: I'm surprised he doesn't just give it up and go for sweatpants. Akira: He says the crotch wears out too fast. McAllister: Yar! That's going to replace the whale in my nightmares -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % Bart overhears the two discuss their plans to knock off Homer, and % runs to tell Marge. Bart: ... so if we don't find Dad this crazy French guy is going to kill him. Marge: Only your father could take a part time job at a small town paper and wind up the target of international assassins. -- "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % The family splits up in search of Homer. The chef has put the % finishing touches on the éclair. Flanders sees it, but the chef % shoos him away before Ned can turn himself into collateral damage. % ("A rude Frenchman, well I've never," the indignant Flanders says.) % Finally, Homer strolls up to the chef's booth. Homer: [eyes the killer éclair] Ooh, sweet! Lisa: [runs up] Dad, no! It's going to kill you Homer: Eh, I've had a good run. Lisa: Don't! It's low-fat! Homer: Noooo! [tosses éclair at a booth. A large explosion ensues] Wiggum: That was close! Thank God it landed in that smoking crater. -- Yeah, those craters really come in handy, "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % The French chef tries to run off but is captured by the police. He % manages to run off again as the cops debate what to have for lunch. % Meanwhile, Homer thanks Lisa for saving his life. Homer: Oh, Lisa, you saved me! And after all the bad things I said about you. Lisa: What bad things? Why? Homer: Oh, Lisa, the important thing is I didn't get my comeuppance, and I never will. Lisa: [notices the restaurateurs massing] Uh ... Dad? Homer: I know honey. The important thing is ... run! [they make a run for the nearest exit] [fade to black and roll credits, just before Homer gets attacked by restaurant owners' mob] Oooh. Finally getting my comeuppance! -- One comeuppance, coming up, "Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?" % [End of Act Three. Time (including over-credit dialogue): 20:17] ============================================================================== > Contributors ============================================================================== {ak} Andy Keim {al} Adam Long {ar} Alex Romero {bcs} Benjy Shyovitz {bg} Bruce Gomes {bjr} Benjamin Robinson {bmn} Bill McNeal {cp} Chris Palm {ddg} Don Del Grande {dj} Darrel Jones {djm} D. J. Maniak {ds} David Sibley {eb} Erica B. {er} Even Ross {gw} Gary Wilson {hl} Haynes Lee {je} Jordan Eisenberg {jg} Joe Green {jk} Joe Klemm {mr} Matt Rose {ms} Mike Smith {ol} Ondre Lombard {rg} Richard Green {rg2} Rebecca Gedalius {sp} Steve Palopoli {th} Tony Hill {tr} Tom Rinschler ============================================================================== > Legal Mumbo Jumbo ============================================================================== This episode capsule is Copyright 2000 Benjamin Robinson. It is not to be redistributed in a public forum without consent from its author or current maintainer (capsules@snpp.com). All quoted material and episode summaries remain property of The Simpsons, Copyright of Twentieth Century Fox. All other contributions remain the properties of their respective authors. The Quote and Scene Summary itself is Copyright 1999 Bruce Gomes. This capsule has been brought to you by the Springfield Fine Dining Association. This work is dedicated to Raymond Chen, James A. Cherry, Ricardo Lafaurie, Frederic Briere, and all of those who made episode capsules what they are today.