Sunday, Cruddy Sunday                     Written by Tom Martin, George Meyer,
                                                 Brian Scully, and Mike Scully
                                                 Directed by Steven Dean Moore
==============================================================================
Production code: AABF08                   Original Airdate on FOX: 21-Jan-1999
Capsule revision C (22-Jul-2001)
==============================================================================
> "TV Guide" Synopsis
==============================================================================
   (United States) Homer leads a slew of Springfield denizens to Miami for the
   Super Bowl in a rollicking episode with a plethora of guest appearances.  A
   travel agent (voice of Fred Willard) offers a free trip if Homer can help
   fill a charter bus. Several phone calls later, the bus departs.  Alas, a
   ticket snafu keeps the group outside the stadium for a while, but
   ultimately they land in the winning team's locker room -- but not before
   visiting the skybox of media titan and (ahem) News Corp. chairman and
   (ahem, ahem) TV GUIDE owner Rupert Murdoch (who's none too happy about the
   intrusion).  Also appearing are Dan Marino, John Elway, John Madden and Pat
   Summerall.  {js}

   (Canadian) Homer's plan for a winning drive to the Super Bowl is stalled.
   {hl}

==============================================================================
> Title sequence
==============================================================================
Blackboard:     I WILL NOT DO THE / DIRTY BIRD

Couch:          The living room floor is now a body of water, with the
                furniture floating on its surface.  The family runs in
                (shallow water, evidently) and jumps on the couch.
                Unfortunately for them, an iceberg floats by and sinks the
                couch.  The family goes down with it, but seconds later Maggie
                pops up on a cushion, and uses the remote to turn on the
                television.

==============================================================================
> Did You Notice...
==============================================================================
   ... at least one team in the football commercial had Springfield Atoms
       helmets?
   ... the two players taking a leak with their fans Plunkett and Waters
       [think about it... -- Ed.]?

Neal Attinson:
   ... when the scalper said (to Homer) "Forget it," his lips actually seemed
       to form the words "F-ck you?"  (A common substitution in cleaned-up-
       for-TV movies.)

Don Del Grande:
   ... there's only one clerk at the post office?
   ... despite visiting the post office the previous year, Lisa doesn't know
       what the last four digits of a ZIP code are for?  (I think they're to
       make it easier to sort the mail in the order it's finally delivered)
       [See "Comments" section for more]
   ... the package addressed to Otto had uncancelled stamps?
   ... in the "pointing and laughing" (in the tire store) and "keep away
       Lovejoy's collar" scenes, the animation was quite jerky?
   ... the NFL's oldest active player sounds like Grandpa from "Hey Arnold!"?
       (It's Dan Castellaneta's voice, if you didn't know)
   ... nobody recognized Homer as an ex-Broncos owner?

Yuri Dieujuste:
   ... the pen at the post office sounds like a large permanent marker?
   ... Marge has foot problems?
   ... Flanders, Rev. Lovejoy, and CBG like football?
   ... Krusty, a celebrity, goes to the Super Bowl with regular people?
   ... Springfield is in driving range of Miami?

Jordan Eisenberg:
   ... only one of the Sherri / Terri twins is on the field trip?
   ... it's Super Bowl season, but Homer thinks winter is coming?
   ... Homer and Wally each take Moe's beer mug to cover their faces, even
       though they have mugs of their own?

Todd Emerson:
   ... Wally Kogen resembled Fred Willard, who provided his voice?
   ... in the "Catholic Church" commercial, when the women came out to work on
       the guy's car, the strategic placing of his body when the car's hood
       (bonnet, for you UK readers) popped up?

Curtis Gibby:
   ... one of the women exaggerated putting the fuel nozzle into the gas tank

Andrew Gill:
   ... the cartoony feet-cycling sound as the group tries to escape the fuzz?

Joe Green:
   ... the winning team wore generic-looking uniforms?

Haynes Lee:
   ... this is the latest scheduled first run of a Simpsons episode in the
       U.S.?  (Global had The Simpsons on the previous Saturday night 10:30pm
       during season 8).
   ... this is the first time Carl has mentioned having a wife?

Ondre Lombard:
   ... this is the first episode George Meyer has written in about five years?
   ... this is Mike Scully's first written episode since he became Executive
       Producer?

Tyler McHenry:
   ... Homer's pupils were moving during the ending credits?

Mark A. Richey:
   ... Otto sleeping in the bus?
   ... the wall calendar with a bridge?
   ... the poster of the tire?
   ... Mel is wearing normal looking clothing?
   ... Lovejoy gets knocked over in the last call rush?
   ... Wiggum fires his gun in the bus once they reach Miami?
   ... Krusty leaves the bus via the window?
   ... Bubba and Hacksaw drop beers to come after Homer?
   ... Rupert Murdoch's skybox is stocked with Duff?
   ... President Clinton's desk has a plaque that says "President" on it?

Tom Rinschler:
   ... Maggie rescues the remote control in the couch gag?
   ... Rudy wears a Notre Dame jacket?

Benjamin Robinson:
   ... Bart went to the game but Lisa, who has liked football in the past,
       stayed home?
   ... Lisa seems to think Marge's egg-ceptional joke is a little lame?
   ... one of the celebrating football players yells, "We're rich!"

Matt Rose:
   ... that this episode had four writers?
   ... the list of names Lisa reads don't mention any of their real names?
   ... Homer apparently doesn't enjoy the "Spanish Flea" song anymore?
   ... Troy's caricature of Ned is almost identical to the one of Lisa?

Samuel Sklaroff:
   ... the painting in the post office from "Blood Feud" is gone?
   ... the players who Bart takes a leak with are "Plunkett" and "Watters"?

Mike Smith:
   ... it's the first episode ever written by two brothers (Brian & Mike
       Scully)?
   ... it's the second episode to have a couch gag taken from a movie?
   ... Maggie is nowhere to be seen (possibly running out of town from betting
       on the Falcons)?
   ... Rupert Murdoch released from Springfield Prison (Where he's in back in
       3F08)?
   ... Homer can go to the winners' locker room, since he partly owned the
       Denver Broncos?
   ... despite John Madden's comments, we didn't see Marge or Lisa painting
       eggs with the Vincent Price Egg Kit?
   ... Vincent Price is driving the bus Pat & John is riding at the end?

==============================================================================
> Voice Credits
==============================================================================
- Starring
   - Dan Castellaneta (Postmaster Bill, Krusty, Homer, Old Football Player,
        Sideshow Mel, Reporter #4)
   - Julie Kavner (Marge)
   - Nancy Cartwright (Bart, Nelson, Ralph)
   - Yeardley Smith (Lisa)
   - Hank Azaria (Worker, Boss, Moe, Coach [?], Rudy, Chief Wiggum, Manager
        [?], Scalper, Apu, Reporter #1, Player, Carl, Jody)
   - Harry Shearer (Principal Skinner, Guard #1, Guard #2, Mail Carrier #1,
        Mail Carrier #2, Mail Carrier #3, Announcer, Lenny, Rev. Lovejoy, Ned
        Flanders, Ticket-Taker, Dr. Hibbert, Catholic Announcer, Reporter #2,
        Locker Room Guard)

- Special Guest Voice
   - Troy Aikmen (Himself)
   - Rosey Grier (Himself)
   - John Madden (Himself)
   - Dan Marino (Himself)
   - Rupert Murdoch (Himself)
   - Dolly Parton (Herself)
   - Pat Summerall (Himself)
   - Fred Willard (Wally Kogen)

- Also Starring
   - Pamela Hayden (Milhouse)
   - Tress MacNeille (Driver, Reporter #3)
   - Karl Weidergott (Vincent Price, Bill Clinton)

==============================================================================
> Movie (and other) references
==============================================================================
   + "Sunday, Bloody Sunday"
      - title spoofs U2 song
      - this was a [1971, British] movie first, starring Peter Finch, Glenda
        Jackson and Murray Head  {ljg}
      - more interesting is the brief appearance of a young Daniel Day-Lewis
        in his film debut  {mar}

   + Atlanta Falcons  {jk}
      - the team has a celebratory dance called the "dirty bird," and
        evidently Mrs. Krabappel doesn't appreciate Bart's performance

   + Titanic
      - couch struck by iceberg and sinks, like the actual ship
      - [{ag} said it reminded him of ABC's Titanic spoof -- Ed.]

   - "In Living Color"  {jr}
      - "Postmaster Bill" character in opening similar in name to Jim Carrey's
        "Fire Marshal Bill" on ILC.

   + Val-u-Pak coupons
      - Val-u-Qual coupons

   + "Escape (The Piņa Colada Song" by Rupert Holmes  {jl}
      - Homer parodies a line from this song

   + NFL Films  {tdm}
      - similar narrator and music

   + "Rudy"
      - movie is the (real-life) story of a young man's improbable quest to
        join the Notre Dame Fighting Irish; the title character tries to get
        on Homer's Super Bowl bus
      - Notre Dame victory march is heard  {tdm}

   + "Batman" the 60's series  {ddg}
      - Vincent Price prone to making puns on "Egg" [He played a villain named
        Egghead in this series -- Ed.]

   ~ "Only Wanna Be With You", song by Hootie and the Blowfish  {jr}
      - Dan Marino throws a pass to Bart that features a camera angle similar
        to that of the video of this song, which also features Marino.

   + "Gimmie All Your Lovin'" (the video) by ZZ Top  {rb}
      - Catholic Church commercial inspired by this video

   + EuroDisneyland  {bjr}
      - EuroDollywood an obvious spoof

   - "Mission: Impossible"
      - similar music plays as Dolly Parton opens the lock

   + "Peanuts"  {tr}
      - Dolly Parton's outfit head resembles Snoopy

   - ABC's "Monday Night Football"  {tr}
      - "Who's ready for some football" similar to this show's "Are you ready
        for some football?"

   + The Three Stooges  {jl}
      - the sounds made by Homer and the security guards as Homer and company
        run from Murdoch's booth

   - Tommy Boy ad
      - "Does this suit make me look fat?" used

==============================================================================
> Previous episode references
==============================================================================
- Shoddy Springfield Elementary field trips  {je}
   - [7G03] SNPP
   - [7F06] Springfield Gorge
   - [8F03] "Ah-Fudge" (Okay, so this was a good one!)
   - [8F14] Lisa wants Marge to sign her permission slip
   - [1F11] The Box Factory
   - [2F19] Springfield civil war site
   - [3F21] Unscheduled field trip to the auto-wrecking yard
   - [4F17] Skinner mentions a field trip to Albany
   - [4F21] The Police Department
   - [5F05] Archeological dig
   - [AABF08] Springfield Post Office

- [8F01] Wheel balancing ("Mr. Lisa Goes to Washington")  {jg2}
- [8F11] complimentary tango lesson  {ddg}
- [8F11] Someone goes on a coupon-fueled shopping spree  {bjr}
- [8F12] (repeats only) allowing for different teams to be in Super Bowl
         {ddg}
- [8F12] Super Bowl episode  {ms}
- [8F12], [5F03] Football-themed episodes  {ms}
- [8F21], [9F22], [3F10], [5F18] Spanish bee (or is it flea?) song heard
- [8F23] Reference to "Sunday, Bloody Sunday"  {ms}
- [8F24] Someone lends name to inferior product  {bjr}
- [9F02] Caricature scene similar (same drawing style, artist ignores answer
         to own question, etc.)
- [9F22] Homer dreamed he's a quarterback of the Broncos  {ms}
- [1F05] Homer tries to get something worthless for free  {ss}
- [1F11] Lame field trip to box factory  {hl}
- [1F13] Homer on the phone with Bill Clinton  {je}
- [1F14] Disgruntled postal worker seen  {hl}
- [3F08] Sideshow Bob's Last Gleaming: Rupert Murdoch appears  {ss}
- [3F23] Denver Broncos?  They suck!  {hl}
- [5F08] "Ding-ding-ding!" when money is found
- [5F10] Homer seems to think the quantity of his purchases will make up for
         poor quality (frozen shrimp / Doughie's pizza)
- [5F10], [5F19], [5F20], [AABF05] "Titanic" referenced  {ss}
- [AABF03] A character reveals where Springfield is, only to take it back
         {jl}

==============================================================================
> Freeze frame fun
==============================================================================
- Clocks at the post office  {je}

    - Post Office: 10:10
    - Post Office Employee Lounge:  10:20 or 3:50

- On the field trip  {je}

    Nelson, Janey, Lisa, Ralph, Milhouse, Lewis, Bart, Richard,
    Wendell, Martin, Sherri, Becky, 3 others

- Envelopes processed by zip code machine in chute #s  {je}

    5, 1, 3, 2, 5, 3, 3, 3, 5, 3

- Ralph's package  {bjr}

     OTTO the
    BUS DRIVER
    c/o SPRINGFIELD
      ELEMENTARY

    [This is not a valid postal address, so it really does belong in
     the dead letter office.]

- At the tire dealer's waiting room  {bjr}

     BEST IN     <- over Homer's left shoulder
    TIRE SALES

    [picture of]        TROUT
    [salesman  ]        FEVER
    [with money]

    CUSTOMER CARE
     SPECIALIST

- Mr. Kogen's business card  {bjr}

            +------+
            |+----+|
    +-------++----++-------+
    |     SPRINGFIELD      |
    |       TRAVEL         |
    |                      |
    | "NOW GET OUTTA HERE" |
    |  Wally Kogen, Owner  |
    +----------------------+

- Going to the Super Bowl  {mar}

    Wally, Bart, Homer, Sea Captain, Pasty-faced lawyer, Moe,
    Dr. Nick, Krusty, Barney, Carl, Ned, Hibbert, Lenny, Kirk,
    Rev. Lovejoy, Chief Wiggum, Jasper, Comic Book Guy, Bee Man,
    Skinner, Hans (but no squeaky voiced teen, unless Rudy was
    supposed to be him)

    [Al Kennedy writes, "The teen sure is there, but he only
     appears in a few scenes.  Homer's forgotten co-worker Charlie
     was also there, he's next to Pasty-faced lawyer.]

- Ned's Super Bowl place of worship  {bjr}

    ROSIE GRIER'S    PORTA-CHAPEL

==============================================================================
> Animation, continuity, and other goofs
==============================================================================
+  The Springfield Post Office looked rather different in [7F22] and [5F14].
   {jl}

*  Nelson, Bart, and Milhouse are in Lisa's class again at the Post Office?
   If Principal Skinner is taking extra classes, why just the fourth and
   second grade?  {pm}

*  What has Fatty Arbuckle done that Krusty hasn't?  He's been dead for at
   least 10 years, which is a requirement for non-Presidents to be on stamps.
   {ddg}

*  Why was the package to Otto in the dead letter office?  It should be easy
   enough to deliver it to the school.  {ddg}

*  Someone with the number 11, as seen on the receiver in the commercial,
   would have to be a kicker, punter or quarterback, and none of these
   positions are allowed to catch a pass.  (The kicker and punter wouldn't be
   on the field, and the QB can't catch his own pass.)  [Richard Kim notes
   Keyshawn Johnson is a wide receiver who wears 19.  Several other people
   also mentioned Kordell Stewart, the Steelers QB who sometimes plays
   receiver -- Ed.]  {ss}

c  When the tire guy asked, "You hear that clunk?" the CC said, "You hear that
   sound?"  {ag}

*  Homer says "winter is coming" in the middle of January.  {mar}

=  McAllister was much darker than usual, and his eyes lacked definition.
   {pm}

=  Lisa reads off Comic Book Guy as list of people Homer's inviting, but when
   they panned across showing the people going, he wasn't there (I checked
   twice), yet he appears on the Bus.  {pm}

=  Chespirito/Pedro/The Spanish Bee Guy is not originally with the group when
   they first wait to board the bus.  {ol}

+  The closet never had shelves before.  {ss}

c  During an aerial shot of the bus, the CC said, "Music blasting," but we
   heard a horn honking.  {ag}

*  Why would Reverend Lovejoy go to the Super Bowl?  [Paul Tomko writes, "He
   can always get a guest speaker, and there was a Church of sorts in the
   parking lot."]  {ol}

*  If Flanders is so worried about missing church on Sunday, why doesn't he
   ask Lovejoy to hold a service for him?  {tr}

c  CC:  Here, here/Go out for a long one.  Said:  nothing.  {ag}

*  Someone holds up a sign saying "Sharks", but there's no NFL team called the
   Sharks.  [See "Comments" section for more -- Ed.]  {ss}

c  While the guard says "No such team as the Sungos", the captions read "No
   such team as the Cowbogs".  {mar}

=  When talking to the scalper, Homer has a pennant that says "FOOTBALL", but
   it suddenly disappears.  {ddg}

*  Why should Homer have trouble getting into the game?  Doesn't he *own* the
   Denver Broncos?  [I submit that he sold the Broncos at some point, probably
   for a ridiculously low price.  See "Comments" section for more -- Ed.]
   {tmh}

=  The Snoopy mask has white ears, but Snoopy has black ears.  {ss}

*  a glass ceiling does not have the strength to land a helicopter.  {hl}

=  The Super Bowl ends in broad daylight, when that's never the case.  (No
   matter what part of the country it's in, it's always dark nightfall by the
   fourth quarter.)  {ol}

+  There _were_ both football and singing in this episode.  {je}

==============================================================================
> Reviews
==============================================================================
Rich Bunnell:  All in all, the episode was utterly wonderful.  It had a really
   fast-moving, weird feel, and quite honestly, that's the Simpsons I LIKE.
   And of course at the end, in the tradition of the "Homer sits and eats pork
   rinds" ending, we see Homer sitting at home watching TV to the tune of
   "Spanish Flea."  Classic.  (A+)

Nathan DeHoff:  This was a pretty silly episode, and more of an amusing
   diversion than one of the great moments in the show.  Still, it never
   really tried to be anything more than a silly, amusing episode, and it
   succeeded, although not as well as some others.  The best bits included
   Homer at the garage, the dubbing joke at Moe's, and the discovery that the
   tickets were counterfeit.  I also liked the credit sequence, and Rupert
   Murdoch's appearance was pretty funny.  Overall, it was rather pointless,
   but still amusing.  (C)

Don Del Grande:  This was your typical "B episode", with a subplot that has
   very little to do with the main plot and then just ends in the middle of
   nowhere, but the whole Super Bowl theme bit makes it a slightly better
   episode.  (B+)

Yuri Dieujuste:  I actually found this major plot to be quite enjoyable.  The
   writing was good and the jokes were funny.  Lisa and Marge's subplot was
   horrible. It was unfunny and suffered from a lack of jokes.  The only thing
   that I could say was that those to were acting normally.  The ending in
   this episode was different from normal but enjoyable.  (B+)

Jordan Eisenberg:  Very reminiscent of Season Nine, in the quick pace,
   off-kilter jokes, odd plot and bland animation.  Marge and Lisa were
   boring, and their story went nowhere. What a way to abandon all the loyal
   fans out there who have to put up with such nonsense from this franchise!
   Wally Kogen was a very forgettable character (except for the clever
   meta-reference in his name).  It was funny at parts, but a little too zany
   and shallow to get a very good grade from me:  (C+)

Alex Foley:  Pretty good Super Bowl episode, but not quite as good as "Lisa
   the Greek".  Only problem was the Marge/Lisa subplot, which should have
   been scrap. But, whoever did the Vincent Price impression deserves a raise.
   (A-)

Andrew Gill:  The plot of this episode just seemed very plodding.  Homer et
   al. don't even get to the Super Bowl until Act 3.  If they had taken out
   the Marge and Lisa ``story'' and spent more time on the plot, I would have
   been much happier with this episode.  The zaniness factor bugged me, also.
   Did we really need the Dolly Parton makeup scene?  The meta humor (except
   the beer mugs thing) was pretty good, however, but I don't think that I can
   say that for much else of the episode.  (B-)

Scott Henrichs:  This was great.  The only part of the episode I didn't like
   was the Marge and Lisa subplot, which was a bit boring except for the Where
   is Springfield joke.  It took me a second to get the joke, but I thought
   the beer mugs in front of the bar patrons lips was hilarious, considering I
   remember watching the old Super Bowl episode when they changed "Washington
   Redskins" to "Dallas Cowboys" and I always thought it looked dumb when the
   characters said Dallas and mouthed Washington.  Also the way Madden and
   Summerall reviewed the whole episode at the end just the way they pick
   apart a football game was real funny.  (A-)

Carl Johnson:  I laughed many times during this episode.  Such times include
   the "Let it out" scene, Al Gore measuring in the White House, and Dolly
   Parton's caustic makeup. Some downsides included the overabundance of guest
   stars that really detracted from the plot, and the same kind of joke used
   over and over again.  I'm referring to the surprise joke.  Where, what
   seems to be one thing really turns into another.  "Oh, hiya, Maude.", the
   group's way of gaining entrance to the stadium, Dr. Hibbert's line-- "As a
   doctor, I'd say he's had enough..." -- the surprise gag.  This one was
   above par for Season Ten, but slightly below average when compared to the
   days of yore.  (B)

Darrel Jones:  A good (but not great) episode, certainly worth waiting through
   twelve hours of Super Bowl-related stuff.  I loved the "mug" scene in
   Moe's, and "Oh, hi Maude!" will go down as a classic Marge line.  And the
   celebrity scenes were all great.  Even the "post-episode analysis" was fun.
   Alas, the Marge & Lisa sub-plot was poorly written and developed.  (B+)

Joe Klemm:  Better than I thought is was going to be.  Even if this makes the
   top ten because it airs after the Super Bowl, it deserves it with clever
   cracks on Vincent Price and the "dog food joke".  Now if it only aired the
   Sunday before the Super Bowl so that East Coasters wouldn't have to tape it
   due to late start time.  (B+)

Haynes Lee:  A good Super Bowl theme but I found the Wally Kogen was a weak
   character even as a wimp. The egg painting subplot was a total non
   sequitir.  (B-)

Patrick McGovern:  This ep was so funny I find it impossible to see it not
   being liked.  Up until the very last part (With Madden (The most annoying
   person alive) and Summerall and Jodi Price driving the bus) it was on my 10
   favorite list ever.  The post office beginning was great, the body-shop
   scene was great, the Super Bowl was great.  It even had an excellent,
   albeit minor subplot.  (A)

Paul Melnyk:  I didn't have high hopes for this Episode, there was no
   intriguement, just another "Wacky Homer" episode to call it, using this
   NG's netiquette.  The first part was very lame, with jokes which didn't
   hit, plus Lisa, Bart, and Nelson were so inaccurately characterized, it
   wasn't funny.  The whole thing was a bore.  There were only two
   smile-crackers, and two giggle jokes.  The funniest part was at the end,
   with Madden + Summerall's critiquing the episode and once again, another
   joke refers to us.  The 'Family Guy' portrayal of them was much better.
   (D+)

Abhi Rey:  I didn't expect much from this episode and not much is what I got.
   This episode suffered a serious case of "'The Springfield Files' Syndrome",
   which can be detected through emphasis of unsubtle gags over humor, as well
   as jokes repeated from past episodes.  Yes, there were a lot of jokes, but
   many of them were just too obvious and jutted out of the plot, which was in
   itself empty. Worst of the season so far.  (C-)

Mark A. Richey:  While this episode wasn't as amusing as the previous Super
   Bowl episode ("Lisa the Greek"), it still provided solid laughs.  The only
   people who had a Cruddy Sunday were the Atlanta Falcons.  (B+)

Tom Rinschler:  This was a blatant attempt by FOX to use the Super Bowl to
   give "The Simpsons" high ratings ... and I didn't care one bit!  I loved
   this episode! It was constantly funny all the way through and had very few
   slow portions. From the intentional overly-obviously (and hence hilarious)
   dubbing of the names of the teams, to the Springfield O-hi-o Maude joke, to
   Al Gore measuring the curtains, to the end commentary, I hardly stopped
   laughing.  (A)

Matt Rose:  A pretty lukewarm episode for me ... nothing much to laugh at or
   scoff at, though I got a kick out of the credits for some reason.  This
   episode seemed like it was wandering all over the place; really hard to get
   into the plot at all.  And Homer was unnecessarily boorish, as usual.  Most
   celebrity cameos didn't do much for me, though I thought Rupert Murdoch did
   a good job.  This one just seemed pretty uninspired and boring, much like
   the Super Bowl itself.  (C-)

Jason Rosenbaum:  Episodes do not get much worse than this.  This episode had
   the lamest plot in recent memory.  Great, they go to the Super Bowl, get
   arrested, break out, go home.  Wow.  This episode was written by FOUR
   people.  Can't they do better than this crap?  (F)

Samuel Sklaroff:  The jokes weren't funny, the "Where is Springfield?" gag
   fell flat, the subplot went nowhere, the cameos were pointless- ugh.  All I
   can say I really liked were the couch gag and Rupert Murdoch yelling
   "Silence!"  Definitely one of the ten worst.  (D-)

Yours Truly:  Sporadically brilliant, especially in the meta-humor department,
   but the episode never seems to go anywhere.  (Well, in terms of comedy,
   anyway.)  We got a fine premise, some good guest stars, and a nicely
   unexpected subplot with Marge and Lisa.  Unfortunately, the requisite
   excitement never fully materialized.  The last thirty seconds make up for a
   some of this, raising my grade to a  (B-)

AVERAGE GRADE:  B- (2.70)   Std Dev.: 1.0193   (32 reviews computed)

==============================================================================
> Comments and other observations
==============================================================================
>> Meta-reference Corner

Benjamin Robinson:  This episode was animated long before anyone knew who
   would go to Super Bowl XXXIII.  The producers emphasized this by the
   deliberately obvious audio splicing in Moe's Tavern, and the awkward way
   the men held the beer mugs in front of their mouths (so you couldn't read
   their lips).

   Wally Kogen's name is an amalgamation of Wal(lace) Wolodarsky and Jay
   Kogen, a former "Simpsons" writing duo.  In an unbelievably amazing
   coincidence, they were the lead writers for the series' other Super Bowl-
   related show, "Lisa the Greek (8F12)."  [{ss} was the first person to
   notice this -- Ed.]

   Marge mentions that she's surprised Vincent Price would lend his name to a
   shoddy product; some of the "Simpsons" merchandise fits that description.


Paul Melnyk observes:  End with John Madden and Pat Summerall talking about
   hardcore fans and stuff not satisfying for them [is similar to a.t.s].


Scott Henrichs counter-argues:  As I said in another post, THIS IS NOT A SPOOF
   ON THIS NEWSGROUP!  You guys are really overestimating the affect you guys
   have on Simpsons writers.  It's a spoof on Madden and Summerall's nit
   picking a football game, but apparently you haven't ever watched a game
   that they have done.


Ellen Cohen suggests an experiment to answer this debate:  There's only one
   way to prove once and for all that the Simpsons' writers lurk here and are
   influenced by us.  We have to start obsessing over something that would be
   more than sheer coincidence if it was brought up.  Like, it's got to be
   very important that we see Nelson Muntz's mother, or that we know what Abe
   Simpson's middle name is, or that we have a Snowball II episode.  We start
   on some teeny detail and obsess so much over it that if it turns up in an
   episode, we'll know it's an ATS in-joke!


>> Musical References

Mike Smith identifies the tire shop song as:  "Spanish Flea", by Herb Alpert &
   The Tijuana Brass, from 1966. You can find it in any record store.


Benjamin Robinson:  ZZ Top's "Legs" played during the Catholic commercial.


Craig Suef:  "Wild Weekend", by NRBQ, the best rock and roll band never to
   have made it to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame (they've been around since
   the 60's).  This was being played on the bus, and a brief snip was played
   over the beginning of the credits at the end of the show.


Matt Rose:  Blur's "Song #2" played while the gang was running around Joe
   Robbie, er, Pro Player Stadium.


>> Writer Watch

It took four guys to write this episode.  Mike Smith details the careers of
   three of them:  Brian Scully, according to Yeardley Smith in her chat at
   Lycos last November, is one of two writers that best described Lisa (The
   other is Ian Maxtone-Graham), having only written, before this one, the
   delightful season 9 episode, "Lost Our Lisa" [5F17], which I admired mainly
   for it's sweet ending.

   Mike Scully  have written some likable episodes (Starting with "Lisa's
   Rival" [1F17]), such as "Two Dozen And One Greyhound" [2F18], which is
   still best remembered for the classic number, "See My Vest", and "Marge Be
   Not Proud" [3F07], but, most of the episodes he written is nothing to write
   home to (Such as "Team Homer" [3F10]).  His last script was the "Homega
   Man" segment of "Treehouse Of Horror VIII" [5F02], which is best remembered
   for an object which is ahead of it's time-the Neutron Bomb with "Intel
   Inside" written on it!

   Before this one, George Meyer haven't been writing an OFF episode since
   "Bart's Inner Child" [1F05].  But, his scripts in the early years are
   classics, starting with his first one,  "The Crapes Of Wrath" [7G13], in
   which "TV Guide" named it as the greatest Simpsons episode listed in their
   "100 Greatest Episodes Of All Time" list back in their June 28-July 4,
   1997, issue (Placed at Number 17, the other OFF episode, "Krusty Gets
   Kancelled" ended up at Number 67).  He wrote it, like tonight's episode,
   with three other writers.  His first full episode is the still-lovable
   "Bart Vs. Thanksgiving" [7F07] (Which have, what I think is still, one of
   Alf Clausen's best-loved scores for any OFF episode ever), "Blood Feud"
   [7F22], the first "Summer Original Episode", "Mr. Lisa Goes To Washington"
   [8F01], the first OFF episode to be presented in Dolby Surround (And, the
   first to have Hank Azaria credited as an featured player), an segment of
   "Treehouse Of Horror II" [8F02], "Separate Vocations" [8F15], and "Homer
   The Heretic" [9F01], the first OFF episode to be produced at Film Roman,
   which is still their animation studio to this day.

   [This is Tom Martin's first "standard" writing credit -- Ed.]


>> Bart's forbidden dance

Joe Klemm:  Originated during the 70's, the Dirty Bird is one of many
   touchdown celebrations.  Recently, this dance was made big thanks to the
   Atlanta Falcons 1998-1999 season, which included a trip to the Super Bowl.
   Sadly, the dance failed to make it big time at the big game, as Denver beat
   the Falcons.


Mark Aaron Richey:  Even more impressive than the mention of the Broncos and
   Falcons was the chalkboard gag, which mentioned the "official" dance of the
   Falcons, one of several novelty dances that have popped up among teams in
   the last few years.  "Dirty Bird" has also become a nickname describing the
   team itself


>> Maybe when they do "Legends of Regional TV Clowns"

Jake Lennington relates the sad tale of a comedian:  Fatty Arbuckle was a
   movie star during the 1920's, until we was tried for the rape/murder of a
   woman.  He was acquitted after two hung juries in a trial as
   sensationalized as O. J. Simpson's seventy years later, but he lost his
   reputation and was permanently blacklisted from movies.  He later wrote
   scripts under false names.


>> Return =this= to sender!

Mark Aaron Richey:  In the early 90's, there were several incidents were
   postal workers or former postal workers shot up their post offices.  While
   these incidents were isolated and unrelated, the stereotype of the
   disgruntled, armed mailman took root.  Today, the term "going postal" has
   entered our vocabulary, meaning to suddenly go nuts.


John Ochs explains why Skinner might not be much better off:  Did anyone else
   notice the somewhat tasteless reference in this episode?  At the post
   office, after mentioning that the "disgruntled postman" is a thing of the
   past and how safe his job is now, Skinner chimes in that he works at an
   elementary school.  At first, I had no idea why he mentioned this, but then
   it hit me; the recent trend of kids going ballistic and opening fire at
   school.  I haven't noticed anyone mention this yet, so I think the writers
   did a good job of sneaking in a "bad" joke.


>> Springfield, NT 26505-3141290125362948567593747...

Benjamin Robinson:  The five-digit ZIP code has been around since the mid-
   Sixties, and should be familiar to everyone [in the United States, anyway]
   by now.  Twenty years later, automatic sorting equipment advanced to the
   point where it was feasible to add an extra four digits.


Brian Petersen explains what the four digits are =really= for:  Except in
   cases where an entity (be it a person or a company) receives a substantial
   amount of mail (take Fox's P.O. Box 900 fan mail address), the nine-digit
   zip codes do not narrow down to individual residences or businesses.  They
   are used to figure which mail bundle in what delivery route each parcel
   should be filed into.

   Ever notice how your postal carrier grabs a sack full of mail, delivers to
   about 10 homes, goes back to his truck for more, and continues on? Every
   bag contains all the mail for each individual +4 zip code.  On my street,
   for instance, there are three blocks: 1200's, 1300's and 1400's on both the
   east and west sides of the street.  One unique +4 code is assigned to every
   block on each side of the street.  I.e., the 1300's on the west side are
   all -1521; on the east, it's -1522.  With the 1400's, the west side is -
   1523, on the east, -1524.


>> Maybe they should start an NFL masters league

Well, obviously the oldest living player in the NFL isn't 53.  Craig Winkler
   writes:  The oldest ex-player is in his 90's, he played for the 1928
   Giants. They talked about him during the All-Millenium team thing [on Fox].
   [{pm} nominates Arda Bowser of the original Canton Bulldogs -- Ed.]


Glen Palmieri noticed:  Don't forget Pat Summerall [in this very episode! --
   Ed.], kicker on the '58 Giants.  He's waaay older than 53.


>> Where is Springfield?

Yuri Dieujuste:  Springfield must be in at least 5-7 hrs driving range of
   Miami since they left at what appeared to be sunrise in Springfield.  This
   points to the states of Florida, Alabama and Georgia.


>> Might've done better if he were more obnoxious...

Joe Klemm:  The small man not going to Miami is a play on Rudy, a small man
   who, in the 1970's, played for Notre Dame's football team.  Though his
   football career only lasted a few minutes, he gained his popularity though
   the fact that playing for Notre Dame was his life-long dream, and that he
   did everything to achieve it. His story was made into a 1993 film by Tri-
   Star.


Mark Aaron Richey has some more about the movie:  Inspiring 1993 movie about a
   small kid who dreams of playing football for Notre Dame all his life, and
   finally, in the last game of his senior year, goes out and makes a
   completely meaningless sack of the opposing quarterback.  It's actually a
   pretty good movie, even if it is a slight story to hang a feature film on.


>> An Egg-ceptional Actor

Darrel Jones explains Vincent Price to the uninitiated:  Vincent Price is a
   notable (and deceased) figure in the world of the macabre. He has appeared
   in horror movies, did a voiceover in Michael Jackson's song "Thriller", and
   voiced the warlock Vincent Van Ghoul on the 1985 cartoon series "The 13
   Ghosts of Scooby-Doo".  (You may shudder when ready.)  I think Marge's line
   about how he's never attached his name to a shoddy product refers to the
   Scooby-Doo series (which, BTW, marked the end of its 17-year run).


Mark Aaron Richey wrote:  Vincent Price was arguably the most famous horror
   movie star of the 50's and 60's, Price excelled at playing mad scientists
   and other weirdoes.  Unlike other horror stars, Price was actually a very
   good actor.  He mostly retired from acting in his later years, though he
   served as the host of PBS's "Mystery!" through most of the 80's.  He died
   in late October 1993 (and yes, he is dead).


Then Todd Emerson wrote:  He was in that classic "Help me!" scene from "The
   Fly," if that helps. It seems that a lot more people have seen just that
   clip than the entire movie.  It was also parodied in one of the Simpsons
   Halloween Specials.

   Vincent's last onscreen role was in "Edward Scissorhands," and if you
   haven't seen it, GO RENT IT RIGHT NOW!!!


Jessi Cuellar reports:  According to my husband, the egg joke is a Batman ref.
   In the series with Adam West, Vincent Price played a villain named Egghead.
   He had and egg shaped head, and he collected eggs, and would get mad if
   someone broke one.


Willondon Donovan adds:  He also did the narration on an Alice Cooper song
   (The Black Widow?) He was a museum curator giving the lecture to patrons on
   his favorite spider.


Cole Rieger confirms:  Price did do a voice over on the 1975 Alice Cooper
   album "Welcome to My NIghtmare" on the track "Devil's Food" where he did
   "play" a curator of a zoo or something with spiders and other creepy
   things. The spiders are the only animals ever made mention of.."moving to
   the next asile we have arichnida, the spiders..." Price also appears on the
   Alice Cooper album "The Alice Cooper Show" playing the curator once again,
   however this is a live album, and taken into account the fact it's live and
   on vinyl the whole thing sounds awful and really great at the same time
   because of those same reasons.


Benjamin Robinson adds:  Yes, he really is dead.  Fittingly enough, he died
   near Halloween.


>> Parade of stars

Man, were there a lot of famous people in this show [aside from Price, above].
   Here's a quick run-down

   Rosey Grier: For a period in the 1960's, he was a member of the "Fearsome
   Foursome" of the Los Angeles Rams defense (along with Merlin Olsen, Deacon
   Jones...and, uh, some other guy).  ["FitNFeisty@aol.com" says it's Lamar
   Lundy -- Ed.]  He was also well-known for doing needlepoint, hardly the
   avocation one would expect of a pro football player.  {dga}

   Grier was also a close friend of Bobby Kennedy, and when Kennedy was shot,
   helped wrestle Sirhan Sirhan to the ground.  Grier's sister is Pam Grier
   (Jackie Brown.)  {jlm}

   [Grier] appeared in a handful of films in the 70's.  After a long hiatus,
   he turned up in the film "Reggie's Prayer" and on an episode of "The Larry
   Sanders Show".  The only other thing I know about him is that he was a
   panelist for a week on "Match Game 74", that Game Show Network showed a
   couple of months ago.  {mar}

   Troy Aikman:  Quarterback for the Dallas Cowboys.  You can recognize him by
   the fact that he's the only team member not wearing police handcuffs.
   {bjr}

   Aikman has led his team, the glorious Dallas Cowboys (a.k.a. America's
   Team) to three world championships, in 1993, 1994, and 1996, and would have
   undoubtedly had lead them to more had it not been for some minor off-the-
   field distractions, a raid by other teams on our, er, their free agents,
   and an incredibly stupid coaching change following the 1993 season (though
   the stupid new coach was still able to win a championship in his second
   year, thanks to Aikman's leadership).  Even now, the 'Boys, though not as
   great as they once were, have won six of the last seven NFC East titles and
   this year, swept all the games in the division (yes, I'm ignoring the 2-6
   record outside of the division, as well as that playoff game).  (note: I am
   from Dallas.  Therefore, I apologize in advance for any hometown bias that
   creeps into this section)  {mar}

   Dan Marino:  Quarterback for the Miami Dolphins.  His arm has been giving
   him trouble lately, but that's because he's incredibly old in quarterback
   years.  The Super Bowl was held in Miami this year, so at least he didn't
   have to make a long trip.  {bjr}

   Marino won the rookie of the year award in 1983 (beating out another rookie
   QB named Elway), and led his team, the Miami Dolphins, to the Super Bowl in
   1985, as well as to several division titles.  His career is winding down,
   though he expects to be back next year (and when you're being coached by
   Jimmy Johnson, who would want to retire?).  {mar}

   John Madden and Pat Summerall:  Announcers for Fox sports; they covered the
   game for the U.S./Canada market right before tonight's episode aired.
   [{ms} adds, "Pat Summerall & John Madden IS truly THE TOP broadcasting team
   in NFL football, first at CBS from 1981 to 1993, then, since 1994, at Fox.]
   {bjr}

   Dolly Parton:  Popular country singer, who really does have a theme park
   (Dollywood) named for her.  {bjr}

   Rupert Murdoch:  The CEO of News corporation, which owns Fox television,
   along with other media properties.  Murdoch has a long-standing reputation
   for autocracy, and "The Simpsons'" own Mr. Burns was reportedly modeled
   after him.  {bjr}

   Rupert Murdoch looked like he was modeled after the man from [3F08]. No
   surprise, since that's who it was supposed to be.  However, the model is so
   close that we can safely say that the man from [3F08] *is* Murdoch, in the
   Simpsons' universe.  {ag}


>> The wandering Oakland Raiders

Mark Aaron Richey gives us the score on this here-today, gone-tomorrow team:
   The Raiders hold the distinction of being the only major league franchise
   to move away from a city, only to return to it later.  The Raiders left for
   Los Angeles in 1982, to the chagrin of the NFL, which had sued to keep the
   team in Oakland.  The league lost, which meant that owners can pretty much
   move their teams anywhere at will now, no matter how popular or profitable
   they are.  Since then, 6 teams, or 20% of the league has moved to new
   cities.  One of those teams was the Raiders, who returned to Oakland in
   1995.  Once again, the league was chagrined, since they now had no team in
   Los Angeles, since the Rams had moved to St. Louis earlier that year.
   Since then, owner Al Davis has made noise about moving the team back to LA,
   or some other place, though for the time being, he seems happy in Oakland.


>> The nonexistent New York Sharks

John C. Hallyburton, Jr. isn't convinced the "Sharks" sign in some of the
   background scenes is a goof:  I think this is actually more of a joke than
   a goof. While there are no NFL "Sharks" there is, of course, the NFL team
   the New York Jets. Their name "Jets" was in turn taken from "West Side
   Story" which was a great Broadway musical about the rivalry between two New
   York City gangs -- the Jets (mostly "white") and the Sharks (mostly Puerto
   Rican). It is a Romeo-and-Juliet story with music by Stephen Sondheim
   including the hit songs "Maria", "Tonight" and "I Feel Pretty".

   So although the reference is somewhat oblique I think the "Sharks" sign
   really is a joke instead of sloppy script or animation.


>> Traded for the Cardinals, no doubt

If you are the owner of one of the teams in the Super Bowl, you are awarded a
   free pass to see the game.  In "You Only Move Twice (3F23)," Hank Scorpio
   gave Homer the Denver Broncos as a thank-you for the work Homer did at
   Globex.  (Now =there's= an employee incentive program!)  So why didn't
   Homer receive tickets to SB XXXIII?  Sean O'Flaherty figured that Homer
   sold the team at some point.  Todd Emerson explains why Homer isn't richer
   than he is.


Todd Emerson:  But, this is HOMER we're talking about.  He might have sold the
   team for a song, just to get rid of them.  (I wonder if, after they won the
   Super Bowl last year, he ended up in the basement again, batting at the
   light bulb while hanging from the rafters?)  Or, if he did sell the team
   for a lot of money, he probably spent it all on "magic beans," or a really
   good car wash, or a case of Henry K. Duff's Private Reserve, or something
   along those lines.

   Or, most likely, the writers just forgot.  Which seems to be the case far
   too often these days.  [Yeah, but that's boring -- Ed.]


On a related topic, Josh Solomon notes:  When Homer took the Lombardi trophy
   he had every right to, since he owned the Broncos that was given to him by
   Hank Scorpio.  [Sean and Todd's reasoning above probably explains why he
   didn't get to keep it -- Ed.]


>> Miscellaneous, Etc.

The Haynes Lee alterna-title for this show is:  Cruddy Waters


Jordan Eisenberg's Alterna-alterna-title:  "I'm Going to Miami (Big Homey
   Style)"


Don Del Grande:  And no, the fact that they in Murdoch's skybox is not a
   reference to his Sky Sports satellite channel, which showed the Super Bowl
   in the UK...


Andrew Gill:  I guess this settles it.  His name is the Squeaky-voiced teen.


Paul Melnyk:  there's a pattern with Dolly Pardon's appearance:  Dolly ->
   Super Bowl -> Half-time -> Celebrity Deathmatch with her on it?
   ["Celebrity Deathmatch" is a claymation show on MTV where celebrities fight
   to the death.  Parton was a "guest" during the Super Bowl halftime show
   this year -- Ed.]


Benjamin Robinson contributes the next two:  The Oakland Raiders:  They moved
   from Oakland, California, to Los Angeles, and them back to Oakland.  Wait
   long enough, and they could be playing at a stadium near you.

   For the "Where is Springfield?" crowd:  It appears the town is within a
   day's driving distance of Miami.


==============================================================================
> Quotes and Scene Summary
==============================================================================
% At the Springfield Post Office, Principal Skinner leads a party of 
% schoolchildren on a tour.

Skinner:	Hey, hey!  Settle down, children.  Now, who's ever 
		wondered how the post office works?
		[dead silence from the kids, who stare blankly]
Skinner:	No one?
Lisa:		I did, until we came here last year.
Skinner:	[fondly] Ah, yes, last year.  Anyway, look!  Here comes 
		our guide for the day, Postmaster Bill!
Bill:		[laughs] Howdy, partners!  Welcome to your post office.
Bart:		Wow!  It's ours?
		[Bart knocks some papers off a shelf and grabs a pen, with 
		which he uses to draw on the wall]
Skinner:	Bart!
Bart:		Be with you in a minute!
-- Don't tell him that it's "your country" either, "Sunday, Cruddy
   Sunday"

% Unflustered, Postmaster Bill continues his tour.

Bill:		This is the lobby, where customers come for all their 
		postalistic needs.
Krusty:	[looking at a poster advertising stamps] Legends of comedy 
		my tukhas.  What has Fatty Arbuckle done that I haven't 
		done?
-- I'd make a list, but there'd be a paper shortage, "Sunday, Cruddy
   Sunday"

% From the lobby, the kids go into a room dominated by a big, 
% complicated machine.

Bill:		This machine reads zip codes.  These five digits tell us 
		where to direct your mail.
Lisa:		But it's nine digits now, what's the point of these 
		other four numbers?
Bill:		Those are citizen relocation codes.  With any luck, 
		we'll ... never need 'em.
		[a red light on a wall-mounted security camera blips; 
		behind it are a pair of security guards, one of which 
		has his finger on a big red button.  They stare at a 
		picture of Lisa on their screen]
Guard #1:	She's onto us.  Should I flood the chamber?
Guard #2:	Not yet.  Let's get some lunch.
-- Sunday, Cruddy Sunday

% Back in the mail room, the field trip continues.

Skinner:	Well, children, any questions for Postmaster Bill?
Nelson:	You ever gone on a killing spree?
Bill:		[laughs] No, no!  The day of the gun-totin' disgruntled 
		shooting up the place went out with the Macarena!
Skinner:	Well, I'm just glad I work in an elementary school.
-- So are the postal workers, "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% The group moves on to the employee lounge.

Bill:			And this is where our employees gather to unwind 
			after a hard day of servin' the public.
			[opens the door; behind it, three mail carriers 
			sit at a table, searching letters for cash]
Mail Carrier #1:	Bingo!  Birthday card!
Mail Carrier #2:	Graduation!
Mail Carrier #3:	Ding-ding-ding!  Wedding!
			[Bill shuts the door quickly and chuckles 
			uneasily]
-- And I thought they didn't want you to mail cash, "Sunday, Cruddy 
   Sunday"

% The last stop on the field trip is the Dead Letter Office.  "As a 
% souvenir of your visit," offers Bill, "you can each help yourself to 
% one piece of undeliverable mail."  The kids excitedly rush over to 
% the mail cart.

Ralph:	[picks up a package addressed to Otto, which is sniffed 
		and growled at by two nearby drug-sniffing dogs] I got 
		some dog food!
Milhouse:	I got my letter to Santa.
Bart:		A coupon book?  What am I gonna do with this piece of 
		junk?
		[sometime later at home, Bart tosses Homer a present]
Bart:		Happy birthday, Dad.
Homer:	Wow!  A Valu-Qual coupon book!  Let's see ... ten 
		percent off carpet cleaning.  Ten! [gasps] Two pizzas 
		for the price of one at Doughy's!
Lisa:		Doughy's has terrible pizza!
Homer:	Yeah, but there's two!
Marge:	Ooh, free foot pain analysis.
Homer:	Oh, Marge, that's a trick to get you in there so they 
		can cure your foot pain.
Marge:	Oh, I guess.  [limps off toward the kitchen]
Homer:	See ya, kids!  Me and my Valu-Qual coupon book are gonna 
		paint the town red, with savings!  I'll start with a 
		couple of pizzas, then a complimentary tango lesson, and 
		I'll cap it off with a smooth, refreshing colonic.
Lisa:		Um, Dad?
Homer:	[singing] Do you like pina colonics, and getting caught 
		in the rain ... [slams door behind him] passing out in 
		the ocean ...
-- Refreshing indeed, "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% At "High-Pressure Tire Sales", Homer takes advantage of one of the 
% coupon book's offers.  His car is being inspected while on a lift.

Homer:	Now, this wheel balancing is free, right?
Worker:	Oh, you betcha, absolutely.  Deh, uh, oh, uh-oh, wait a 
		minute.  These tires won't take a balance!
Homer:	They won't?
Worker:	Nah, nah, no, you hear that clunk? [knocks on wheel]
Homer:	No ...
Worker:	Well, that tells me you need four new tires.
Homer:	Really?
Worker:	Yeah.  Legally, I can't even let you drive outta here on 
these.
Homer:	Oh, please, can't you let me slide this time?
Worker:	Gee, I'd really like to, but if my boss found out, I ...
		[the employee makes a quick hand gesture to his boss]
Boss:		All right, what's going on over here?  Were you gonna let 
		this man drive out of here on unsafe tires?
Worker:	No boss, I swear!
Boss:		Ah, that's it, you're fired!
Homer:	No!  Wait!  This is all my fault!  Oh, if I could only 
		turn back the clock and buy four new tires ...
		[the two workers smile]
-- Are you taking advantage of the coupons, or are the coupons taking
   advantage of you?  "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Later, Homer sits in the waiting room alone, next to a copy of Trout 
% Fever magazine, a portrait of the man who had just scammed him (the 
% "Customer Care Specialist"), and a broken TV.  Cheerful yet annoying 
% Muzak plays.  Suddenly, someone walks in.

Wally:	Ooh, I know that look, heh.  You came in for the free 
		wheel balance and now it's costing you five hundred 
		simoleans.
Homer:	Six, with the tip.
Wally:	Hey, you got off easy.  I just came in to use the phone, 
		and they got me for the whole road king package -- 
		alignment, shocks, Armor All, stem lube ...
Homer:	[laughs] Stem lube!  Even I didn't fall for that.  
		Although winter is coming.
Wally:	Man, we are a couple of grade "A" suckers. [laughs] Wally 
		Kogen.
Homer:	Hey, I know you!  We were in the same pyramid scheme.
Wally:	Oh, don't remind me.  "Friends helping friends" my ass.  
		Say, you wanna grab a beer while we're waiting?
Homer:	Yeah, I'm getting tired of them pointing and laughing at 
		us.
		[a few of the workers are looking through the glass walls 
		of the shop's waiting room, laughing loudly]
-- "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% At Moe's Tavern, the two drink a beer while the bar TV plays a 
% football documentary.

Announcer:	The road to the Super Bowl is long and pointless.  I 
		mean, when you think about it.
Homer:	[laughs] Football's so great.
-- He never thought about it, "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% The documentary continues.

Announcer:	But now, the two conference champs must survive a 
		harrowing bye-week that no one enjoys.
		[the TV shows a bunch of football players lounging by a 
		pool]
Moe:		Bye-weeks.  Bronco Nagurski didn't get no bye-weeks!  
		And now he's dead!  Well, maybe they're a good thing.
Wally:	Yeah, how 'bout that Super Bowl?  You going this year?
Homer:	Me?  Nah.  Unless there's a coupon for it! [flips 
		through coupon book] Nah.
Wally:	Well, I run the Springfield Travel Agency.  We've got a 
		charter bus going down to the game.  You help us fill 
		it, you can ride for free!
Homer:	Homer Simpson at the Super Bowl?
		[imagines himself watching the game; a player is hauled 
		off on a stretcher]
Coach:	Dang!  That was my last quarterback.  Now what am I 
		gonna do?  [The coach looks into the crowd, and sees 
		Homer] You!
Homer:	Me?
Coach:	Yeah, you!  Get your hand off my wife's leg!
Homer:	Sorry!  [pulls his hand off the leg of the woman 
		sitting next to him, who glares]
-- "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Back to the bar.

Homer:	It's a deal!  Hey, Moe, you wanna come with me and Wally 
		to the Super Bowl?
Moe:		Oh, absolutely!  My favorite team's in it!  The ... [he 
		brings a beer mug up to his mouth, obscuring the exact 
		motion of his lips] Atlanta Falcons.  Yeah, ever since I 
		was a boy, I've always loved the ... [again, with the mug] 
		Atlanta Falcons.
Homer:	Yeah, they're good, but I wouldn't count out the ... 
		[gestures for the mug, and also does the mug bit] Denver 
		Broncos.
Wally:	Yeah, I hear that President ... [mug] Clinton is gonna to 
		be watching with his wife [mug] Hillary.
-- The Great American Variable, "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% In his kitchen, Homer, wearing his glasses, holds a clipboard and 
% talks on the phone, trying to round up a Super Bowl road trip.

Homer:	Come on, Lenny, I need four more guys to fill my Super 
		Bowl bus.  What do you say?
Lenny:	[on phone] Naah ...
Homer:	Come on ...
Lenny:	Naah ...
Homer:	Come on!
Lenny:	Naah ...
Homer:	Oh, come on!
Lenny:	Oohhh ...
Homer:	Yes!  Now that Lenny's in, Carl will fall like a domino.
Marge:	I'm so happy you're going to the big game.  My dream has 
		always been to see the Bolshoi ballet.
Homer:	Yeah, yeah.  Do we have any pencils that work?
Lisa:		[looking at Homer's clipboard] Wow, you've signed up quite 
		a few people, Dad.  Sea Captain, Bumblebee Man, Comic Book 
		Guy, the Squeaky-Voiced Teen ...
Homer:	Yeah, it's a good group.
-- Can you name a better group?  "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% In front of Wally's travel agency, Homer's Bowl buddies wait at the 
% corner for the bus, which pulls up.  Wally agrees that Homer has 
% assembled a good group.  With no women in the group the guys decide 
% they can hang loose.  One by one, the guys let their bellies out, 
% which bulge out their shirts not unlike bullfrog necks.  Just then, 
% the door to the bus opens; an attractive woman sits behind the 
% wheel.  "All aboard for Miami," she says, to which the men on the 
% street corner pull themselves back together.
%
% In a short while, everyone is packed up and ready to go.  Wally, 
% standing at the front of the bus, raises his arms.

Wally:	Super Bowl, please, and step on it!
Bus:		Yay!
Rudy:		[running up to catch the moving bus] Hey, wait up!
Moe:		Ah, crap, it's that pip-squeak Rudy.
Homer:	[opening the bus door] What is it, Rudy?
Rudy:		[running alongside] Can I come, too?
Krusty:	Forget it, kid.  You're too small to go to the Super Bowl.
Rudy:		But what I lack in size, I make up for in ... [the door 
		slams on his lips; he pries it open] obnoxiousness!
		[Rudy trips and falls on his face, watching the bus drive 
		off into the sunset, everyone inside cheering]
-- "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% [End of Act One.  Time:  7:26]
%
% The tour bus is full of life, everyone on board drinking beer, 
% listening to music, and throwing a football around.  Wally takes the 
% PA and talks to his customers.

Wally:	Well, sports fans, I see you've located the beer supply, 
		so let's all enjoy it in moderation.
		[the bus riders yell "Boo!" and throw their beer cups at 
		him]
		[weakly] Hey, don't make me come back there!  Seriously, 
		now, if you have any questions, just ask our team leader, 
		Homer Simpson.
Homer:	[singing drunkenly] Uhhhhh ...
Wally:	Or ... me.  Better ask me.
-- That is, if you want a coherent reply, "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Back in Springfield, Marge and Lisa sit on opposite ends of the 
% couch.

Marge:	[sighs] It's so nice to have a peaceful weekend together.
Lisa:		Yeah, I'm bored too.
Marge:	Mm-hmm.  Hey, why don't we do one of those craft kits Aunt 
		Patty always gives us?
		[Marge opens a nearby closet] 
Marge:	Ooh!  How about paint-by-numbers?
Lisa:		It's so rigid and uncreative.
Marge:	Okay ... oh, leathercraft!
Lisa:		Oh, those poor, helpless cows.
Marge:	Mmm ... what about clay?  You got any problem with clay?
Lisa:		Hey, what's this? [blows the dust off] "Vincent Price's 
		Egg Magic".
Marge:	Well, what are we waiting for?
-- Let the good times roll, "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Homer and Wally's bus is rapidly heading for Miami.  Lenny and a few 
% others try to keep themselves amused with a game of "keep away" with 
% Rev. Lovejoy's collar.  It turns out to be even more amusing than 
% hoped -- when Lenny pulls the Reverend's collar out of his shirt, 
% causing his clothes to peel off and fall to the floor.  Everyone 
% laughs.
%
% Chief Wiggum announces last call.  Everyone clamors for the case of 
% Duff he holds up; as they get too rowdy, Wiggum holds points his gun 
% at them and yells, "Come on, give me an excuse!"  Just then, the 
% driver sees the stadium ahead and makes an announcement -- "Pro 
% Player Stadium, Super Bowl," she says.  The boys all cheer and pile 
% out of the bus, leaving behind a bunch of trash, and, noticeably, a 
% goat feeding on it all.

Wally:	I'm sorry, the guys made kind of a mess in your bathroom.
Driver:	What bathroom?
-- The one you have now, "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Wally calls out to the rest of the troops, who are already on their 
% way to the stadium, except for Ned, the last off the bus.

Wally:		Uh, okay fellas, enjoy the pre-game fun!
Ned:			I don't wanna be a panicky Pete, but it's Sunday, 
			and I haven't been to church yet.
Wally:		No problem, the NFL's got you covered!
			[Wally points to "Rosey Grier's Porta-Chapel", where 
			a few souls have gathered to hear a sermon]
Grier:		And that the wandering Oakland Raiders may someday 
			find a home, Lord, hear our prayer.  Can I get an 
			amen to that?
Congregation:	Amen!
-- "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Bart and Homer make their way through the distractions, including 
% the oldest surviving NFL player -- 53 years young -- as well as Troy 
% Aikman, who is doing caricatures.

Homer:	Hey!  Troy Aikman!
Aikman:	So, Ned, do you like dune buggies?
Ned:		Well, it's not my cup of ...
Aikman:	Sure you do!  Everyone likes dune buggies!
-- Everyone who counts loves dune buggies, "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Troy is drawing Ned riding in a dune buggy, just as he's done 
% everyone else who's come to his booth, some samples of which hang on 
% the wall.
%
% Elsewhere, Dan Marino runs a "Catch A Pass" booth.  He tosses one to 
% Mel, who makes a diving catch.

Mel:		Great spiral, Daniel!
Marino:	[soaking his arm in ice] Man, that hurts.
Homer:	[cutting through line] Excuse me, coming through, friends 
		of Dan Marino.  Okay, Dan, fire away!
Manager:	I'm Dan's manager.  This is Dan.
Marino:	[to Bart] Go long, son.
Bart:		Yes, sir!
		[Bart runs out; the ball flies through the air]
		I'm catching a pass from Dan Marino!  This is the greatest 
		moment of my ... 
Homer:	[intercepts the pass] Woo hoo!  Homer Simpson with the 
		pick!
Marino:	Hey Bubba, Hacksaw!  Get that moron!
Homer:	[being chased] Uh, oh!  Lateral to Bart!
		[the goons tackle him anyway]
		[weakly] My spine!
-- Unnecessary roughness, "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Back in the Simpsons' kitchen, Marge and Lisa enjoy a pleasant 
% Sunday afternoon together painting Vincent Price's eggs.

Marge:	Oh, honey!  That is egg-ceptional! [laughs]
Lisa:		[laughs, then rolls her eyes] Okay.  Now, we just have to 
		stick the feet on.
Marge:	Right.  Hmm ... Lisa, I don't want to alarm you, but I'm 
		not finding any.
Lisa:		But it clearly says "feet included."  They have to be 
		here!
Marge:	No, nothing!  I can't believe Vincent Price would lend his 
		name to such a shoddy product.
-- Talk to Scooby-Doo or Michael Jackson, "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Lisa wonders what she and her mother should do now.

Lisa:		Now what do we do?
Marge:	Let's call the company.
Lisa:		Mom, this was made in 1967, they're probably out of 
		business.
Marge:	Well, we'll just see. [dialing] Murray Hill, 5-9232.
		[the call actually connects; even more surprisingly, 
		Vincent Price himself answers]
Vincent:	Hello, this is Vincent Price.
Marge:	Oh!  It's Vincent Price!  I thought he was dead!
Vincent:	You should know the grave could never tame me! [laughs 
		madly]
Marge:	Oh, Mr. Price!  I loved you in "The Abominable Doc ..."
Vincent:	If you're calling about the missing feet, leave your 
		address, and the replacement feet will be rushed to you by 
		my grandson Jody.
		[Marge scribbles "Jody Price" on a notepad]
Vincent:	And now, I must return to the sweet embrace of the crypt.  
		But I'll be back! [ghoulish laughter]
Lisa:		So is he alive, or not?
Marge:	[shrugs, waiting for the beep] 742 Evergreen Terrace, 
		Springfield, oh hiya, Maude!  Come on in!
-- Your heart jump for a second there?, "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% As Homer and his friends stand in the ticket line, a scalper makes 
% his way over to them.

Scalper:		Who needs tickets, tickets right here!  How 'bout 
			you, slick?
Homer:		Scalping tickets to the Super Bowl, have you no 
			shame, sir?  I should give you a royal caning!
Scalper:		Hey, I'm just trying to make an honest buck.
Homer:		Aw, get lost, you blood-sucking parasite.  Wally and 
			I have all the tickets we need.
Ticket-Taker:	Uh, sorry, fellas, but these tickets are 
			counterfeit.
Wally:		What?
Homer:		Counterfeit?!
Ticket-Taker:	Yeah, see, the hologram's missing ... and there's no 
			such team as the "Spungoes" ... and finally, they 
			seem to be printed on some sort of cracker. [takes a 
			bite of one]
Homer:		[grabs tickets back] Stop eating our tickets!
-- In order from least to most obvious, "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Thrown for an unexpected loss, Homer and Wally figure out their next 
% play.

Wally:	Oh, how could I fall for fake tickets?  Gee, the fellas 
		are gonna be crestfallen.
Homer:	Yes, if by "crestfallen" you mean "kill us!"  Listen, let 
		me talk to them, maybe I can smooth this over.  [to all] 
		My friends ...
Krusty:	They don't have the tickets!
Moe:		Kill 'em!
-- He should work for the Websters' people, "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% The other Bowl trippers start attacking Homer and Wally, strangling 
% Wally and putting Homer in a headlock.  Homer, yelling, promises to 
% get them in; they cool out for a moment and let him go.

Homer:	Excuse me, Mr. Scalper, sir, have I told you that I love 
		you?
Scalper:	Forget it.  You'll just hurt me, like all the others.
Homer:	Okay, Moe, I believe you had me by the throat.  Reverend 
		Lovejoy was working the body ...
Bart:		Wait!  Dad, look!  [points to a rack of "Halftime Show 
		Costumes"]
Homer:	Hello?  Gentlemen, I have an idea.
		[takes the rack of clothes and uses them to knock down a 
		pair of security guards, who give chase]
Homer:	[running] We can still make the kick-off!
		[camera cuts to a close-up of Lenny]
Lenny:	Here comes the kick!

% The gang is revealed to be in some kind of jail cell; as Hibbert and 
% Wiggum hold Homer's arms, Krusty lines up and kicks Homer in the 
% rear.  The others throw their arms up and cheer.
%
% "As a doctor, I'd say he's had enough," Hibbert says.  "But as a 
% football fan ..."  He lines up and kicks him again as the other 
% prisoners yell.
%
% [End of Act Two.  Time:  13:41]
%
% A lone blue automobile drives down a deserted road.  When it reaches 
% a tiny two-pump gas station, a man steps out.  Seeing no one else 
% around, he beeps his horn.
%
% The door to the station pops open; three minimally-clothed young 
% women step out as ZZ Top's "Legs" plays, sans vocals.  After a bit 
% of posing and wiggling, they go to work cleaning and gassing up his 
% car, until the man notices a cross hanging around the neck of the 
% blonde.  A voice-over says, "The Catholic Church.  We've made a few 
% ... changes."  Marge, Lisa, and Maggie sit on the couch, watching 
% all of this on TV.  "These Super Bowl commercials are weird," Lisa 
% concludes.
%
% Pat Summerall and John Madden are in the announcers' booth, calling 
% the game.

Summerall:	Just about ready for the second quarter here in Miami.
Madden:	I'll tell ya, Pat.  That wild first quarter blew out my 
		telestrator.  And now the fans are screaming for more.
		[among those screaming is Homer J., shaking the bars of 
		his cell]
Homer:	Aaah!  Let us out of here!
Wiggum:	Relax, Simpson, relax.  A little known fact about jail 
		cells they always have one phony bar for, like, 
		emergencies.  [tapping each bar successively] Real, 
		real, real, real, real.  So, by the process of 
		elimination, this one is the fake.
		[Chief Wiggum takes a few steps back and charges the bar 
		head first.  It's real]
		Ah, ah, that's painful.
-- Florida's prison builders must not have gotten the memo,
   "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Just then, the crowd cheers.

Lenny:	Aw, nuts.  That sounds like a touchdown.
All:		[groan]
Apu:		No, no, no, I know my roars.  And that was most definitely 
		a safety.
All:		[groan]
Wally:	Gosh, fellas.  To see you stuck in here when even guys in 
		China can watch the action from their town squares or 
		what-have-you, well, I just feel pretty doggone bad.  If 
		they were electing a president of Dumbville, I'd have to 
		nominate me.
Bart:		You got my vote.
-- Civic-minded as always, "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Just when things look their bleakest ...

Homer:	Oh, we're never going to get out of ... [a lady walks 
		past] psst!  Cleaning lady!  Would you let us out of here?
Dolly:	Me?  I'm Dolly Parton!
Homer:	I didn't ask for your life story, just give me the key!
Dolly:	Young man, where I come from, the South, folks say 
		"please".  And besides, I gotta go sing a medley with Rob 
		Lowe and "Stomp."
Wally:	Dolly, wait!
Dolly:	Wally?
Krusty:	You know Dolly Parton?
Wally:	Yeah, I book a lot of package tours to Dollywood, and 
		Euro-Dollywood.  That's in Alabama.
Dolly:	Wally Kogen, what are you doing in Super Bowl jail?
Krusty:	Ask her if she'll go out with me!
Wally:	We had a little ticket snafu, do you think you can bust 
		old Wally and his pals out of the pokey?
Dolly:	Well, I do have some of my extra-strength make-up remover.  
		Uh, shield your eyes.
		[Dolly rubs some make-up remover on the lock of the prison 
		door.  The steel sizzles, sparks, and smokes, and the door 
		pops open.  The Springfielders all start to walk out]
Lenny:	Thanks, Miss Parton.
Barney:	Way to go, Dolly!
Bart:		Thanks, babe.
Krusty:	Will you go out with me?
Dolly:	Ooh, look at the time.  I'd better scoot to that half-time 
		show.  See ya!
		[Dolly slaps on a rocket pack and puts a huge Snoopy mask 
		over her head.  Firing up the engines, she flies off 
		toward the field]
Homer:	Man, that's gonna be some show!
-- "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Now, the boys are ready for some football!  The group begins to race 
% from corridor to corridor cheering, to the tune of "Song 2" by Blur.  
% Suddenly, Moe stops.

Moe:		Hold it, we've been running around cheering for an hour!  
		Where the hell's the game?
Homer:	You guys are following me?  I was following Flanders!
-- "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Bart yells, "Hey, look what I found!"  He opens up a double door 
% labeled "Private", discovers a regal-looking skybox room.  They dash 
% in and start eating and drinking everything there.  Bart, watching 
% the game, points out that somebody just scored.  "In a minute," the 
% others murmur.  Suddenly, a helicopter lands on the glass roof.

Hey!  It's the beer 'copter!
-- Homer, "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Only it isn't.  A man steps out of the chopper and walks to a nearby 
% elevator.  It drops down to the level of the Springfielders, when 
% the door opens; two guards in black suits step out, followed by a 
% gray-haired man in a brown suit.

Murdoch:	What the bloody hell?
Homer:	Hit the road, gramps.  This is a private sky-box.
Murdoch:	I'm Rupert Murdoch, the billionaire tyrant.  And this is 
		my sky-box.
Wiggum:	If you're Rupert Murdoch, prove it.
-- "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Murdoch whispers briefly to one of his guards, who makes a quick 
% phone call on his cell phone.  On the field below, to the "20th 
% Century Fox" theme, both teams line up on the field below and, in 
% big people-letters, spell out and shout "Hi Rupert".  Homer and his 
% friends, seeing this, say "Uh oh," together.

Wally:	Well, I'm convinced.  Tell you what, Mr. Murdoch.  Let's 
		just split the difference.  The boys and I will just 
		crouch here quietly, and take it easy on the snacks ...
Murdoch:	Silence! [he throws something on the ground, and two puffs 
		of smoke appear, revealing three policemen] Seize them!
-- "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Homer and company take off, pursued by the guards, who mutter "Oi, 
% oi, oi".  Rushing down to field level, they end up in the path of 
% the winning team just as they leave the field.  The football 
% players, celebrating and running down the narrow hallway, push the 
% Springfielders right into their locker room.  A few reporters shout 
% out questions.

Reporter #1:	How does it feel?
Reporter #2:	Was it a team effort?
Reporter #3:	Did you ever stop believing?
Reporter #4:	Does this suit make me look fat?
-- "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Two security guards slam the doors to the locker room and tell the 
% disappointed reporters, "Players and VIPs only".  Inside, everyone 
% celebrates the victory.

Ned:		I can't believe it!  We're actually in the winning locker 
		room!
Player:	Whoo!  I'm going to Disneyland!
Wally:	Really, 'cause I'm a travel agent, and I've heard nothing 
		but bad things.
-- "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Homer nods.  Elsewhere, Barney grabs a bottle of champagne from some 
% players and takes a swig.  A telephone rings.  Homer answers it.

Homer:	'Yello.
Clinton:	Uh, hello, this is President Clinton.
Homer:	Hey, how ya doing?
Clinton:	You know, your determination and grit under extreme 
		pressure are an inspiration.  The whole country is proud 
		of you.
Homer:	Well it's about time!
Clinton:	And on behalf of America, I'd like to ...
		[just then, Homer gets snapped in the butt by Reverend 
		Lovejoy's towel]
		Ow!  [chases after Lovejoy, giggling]
Clinton:	Hello?  Hello?  I command you to answer me!  Hello? [sees 
		Gore taking measurements on Clinton's window] Al, do you 
		have to do that right now? [Gore nods]
-- "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% After the game, the Springfielders get ready to get back on the bus.

Lenny:	What are you gonna do with your Super Bowl ring, Carl?
Carl:		Eh, I'll probably give it to my wife.  It's our 
		anniversary today.
All:		Awww!
Bart:		[sees Homer with the championship trophy] Dad, that 
		doesn't belong to you.
Homer:	But this might be my last chance to win one.
Wally:	Well, we sure put together a heck of a trip, Homer.  Ever 
		thought about being a travel agent?
Homer:	Wally, I'd be lying if I said I hadn't.
Wally:	'Cause you can really ... "go" places in the travel 
		business.  Huh? [laughs] Feel free to use that one.
Homer:	What one?
-- "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% The bus pulls off; John Madden and Pat Summerall, who had been 
% standing behind it, come out to discuss their opinion of the 
% episode.  [And since they're not on the Internet, their opinion 
% counts -- Ed.]

Summerall:	Well John, what did you think of tonight's episode?
Madden:	I loved it!  The last-minute addition of Wally Kogen to 
		the line-up was a bit of a gamble, but it really paid 
		off.
Summerall:	Marge and Lisa painting eggs?  Did that work for you?
Madden:	Ho, ho, big time!  They came off the bench with a huge 
		effort that allowed Homer and Bart to make some 
		significant gains.
Summerall:	Did it strike you as odd that in a Super Bowl show with 
		Dolly Parton we didn't see any football or singing?
Madden:	I hadn't thought about it, Pat, but in retrospect, it 
		was kind of a rip-off!  What a way to treat the loyal 
		fans, who put up with so much nonsense from this 
		franchise.
Summerall:	Any final thoughts? 
Madden:		Nah, I'm too mad, let's get the heck out of here!
-- Now you don't even need to review the episode, "Sunday, Cruddy
   Sunday"

% A bus pulls up on the road behind John and Pat; Vincent Price is 
% driving.

Vincent:	All aboard, boys, I've been waiting for you!
Madden:	Now I'll tell you, that doesn't make a lick of sense!
Summerall:	I know.  Just get on the bus.
		[the two get on; we get a parting shot of the vehicle 
		from above and behind, as Price tries to work the manual 
		transmission]
Vincent:	Second pedal, clutch ... wait, wait, I'll get it!
Jody:		Give it some gas, Grandpa!
Vincent:	Oh, quiet, Jody, you're not helping.
-- "Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"

% Fade to credits, which shows Homer in the waiting room of the auto 
% shop, listening to Muzak.  His eyes move about occasionally.  The 
% shush of the Gracie Films lady is replaced with Rupert Murdoch 
% yelling "Silence!".
%
% [End of Act Three.  Time (up to "Silence!"):  21:10]

==============================================================================
> Contributors
==============================================================================
{ag}  Andrew Gill
{bjr} Benjamin Robinson
{ddg} Don Del Grande
{dga} Dale G. Abersold
{hl}  Haynes Lee
{je}  Jordan Eisenberg
{jg2} Joe Green
{jk}  Joe Klemm
{jl}  Jake Lennington
{jlm} Jesse Leon McCann
{jr}  James Reisdorf
{js}  Jay Sherman
{ljg} Larry J. Guzman
{mar} Mark Richey
{ms}  Mike Smith
{ol}  Ondre Lombard
{pm}  Paul Melnyk
{rb}  Rich Bunnel
{ss}  Samuel Sklaroff
{tdm} Travis D. McLemore
{tmh} Tyler McHenry
{tr}  Tom Rinschler

==============================================================================
> Legal Mumbo Jumbo
==============================================================================
This episode capsule is Copyright 2001 Benjamin Robinson.  It is not to be
redistributed in a public forum without consent from its author or current
maintainer (capsules@snpp.com).  All quoted material and episode summaries
remain property of The Simpsons, Copyright of Twentieth Century Fox.  All
other contributions remain the properties of their respective authors.  The
transcript itself is Copyright 1999 John Ogan.  This capsule has been brought
to you by Homer Simpson, proud owner of the Denver Broncos.

This work is dedicated to Raymond Chen, James A. Cherry, Ricardo Lafaurie,
Frederic Briere, and all of those who made episode capsules what they are
today.

Many thanks to Dave Hall and Frederic Briere, who provided me with
alt.tv.simpsons archives when needed.  This capsule wouldn't be nearly as
complete without their invaluable help.